Diameter Jokes
35 diameter jokes and hilarious diameter puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about diameter that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Diameter Short Jokes
Short diameter jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The diameter humour may include short circumference jokes also.
- What do you get when you divide a pumpkin's circumference by its diameter? Pumpkin pi
Heard this on Psychostick's livestream :3 - What do you get when you take a bovine and divide its circumference by its diameter? A cow pi.
- So a circumference walks into a restaurant... ...sits down and orders a bowl of diameter ice cream. The waiter asks, "You want pie with that?"
- You would think that with the sun being 109 times the diameter of Earth... ...that it would be hard to lose it at night right? So I sat outside for the whole night, and then it dawned on me.
- If Demeter is the goddess of crops... Does that make Diameter the goddess of crop circles?
- What do you get when you cut a Jack O' Lantern by its diameter? Pumpkin pi.
Happy Pi Day, y'all! - Did you guys know that my son is a really big star? Yup, he's 1.989 x 10^30 kilos and has a diameter of 1.4 million kilometers.
- I made fun of the astronomers for trying to figure out the Sun's diameter to circumference ratio.. That was really a pi in the sky idea...
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Diameter One Liners
Which diameter one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with diameter? I can suggest the ones about radius and dial.
- What do you get if you divide a pumpkins circumference by its diameter? pumpkin π
Sorry. - What is half the diameter of a radish? ...the radiush.
- What's a pumpkin circumference divided by pumpkin diameter? Pumpkin pie
- What's the ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter? Eskimo pi.
- What did the circumference of a circle say to its diameter? Want some pi?
- What part of a circle can tell the time of the day? The dia-meter
- My friend broke his radius. I am twice as jinxed, I broke my diameter.
- What is Pewdie's CIRCUMFERENCE divided by Pewdie's DIAMETER? PEWDIE-PIE
- How do you find Pumpkin pi? By dividing its circumference by its diameter!
- Why do we learn the diameter and area? >!for buying windows after sucide. !<
Fun-Filled Diameter Jokes to Boost Your Mood
What funny jokes about diameter you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean caliber jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make diameter pranks.
A mathematician, a physicist and an engineer are tasked with finding the volume of a rubber ball
The mathematician takes the ball, measures its diameter, then calculates the volume.
The physicist submerges the ball in water and measures the amount of water displaced.
The engineer twists and turns the ball, looking for the model number.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A rooster smokes m**... and walks in a circle. What is the name for the ratio of the circumference of that circle to its diameter?
Chicken p**... pi
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
s**... Statistics on a Plane.
A businessman boards a flight and is lucky enough to be
seated next to an absolutely gorgeous woman. They
exchange brief hellos and he notices she is reading a manual about s**... statistics. He asks her about it and she replies,
"This is a very interesting book about s**... statistics.
It identifies that American Indians have the longest
average p**... and Polish men have the biggest average
diameter. By the way, my name is Jill. What's yours?"
He coolly replies, "Tonto Kawalski, nice to meet you."
A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer are asked "what is pi?"
The mathematician says "pi is the ratio of a circumference to its diameter".
The physicist says "pi is 3.1415"
The engineer says "it's about 3"
5 Jokes About Pi
1. Divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter and what do you get?
Pumpkin Pi
2. I saw a movie and gave it a 3.1415 out of 5.
It was Life of Pi
3. My friend decided to get a tattoo of the symbol pi on his face.
It was an irrational decision
4. Who was the roundest knight at King Arthur's table?
Sir Cumference . but how did he get that way?
eating too much Pi.
5. I hate all these Pi jokes.
They go on forever.
With that last one I'll show myself the door.
You have a pumpkin.
You measure around it. All the way around.
Then you cut the pumpkin in half so the top is separate from the bottom.
Measure across the cut pumpkin.
Divide the circumference by the diameter.
What do you have now?
Pumpkin Pi
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Russian President Vladimir Putin called Barack Obama with an emergency request
Mr President, we need help. Our largest c**... factory has exploded, the Russian President explained. My people now have no method of birth control! This is a true disaster!
Vladimir, said Obama, the American people would be happy to do anything within their power to help you.
We do need your help, said Putin.
Could you possibly send one million condoms to tide us over? No problem, I'm on it, said Obama.
Oh, and one more small favour, please? said Putin. Yes? said Obama.
Can you supply the condoms red in colour and at least ten inches long and four inches in diameter?
No problem, replied Obama, and with that, he hung up and called the CEO of Durex. I need a favour, you've got to make one million condoms right away and send them to Russia.
Consider it done, said the CEO of Durex.
Great! Now listen, they have to be red in colour, ten inches long and four inches wide.
Easily done. Anything else?
Yes, says Obama. Print 'MADE IN USA, SIZE MEDIUM' on each one.
