Detroit Jokes
80 detroit jokes and hilarious detroit puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about detroit that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Have you been searching for Detroit Lions, Red Wings, Tigers and Pistons jokes? Look no further! Find endless amounts of jokes from the Motor City here! Read about how the city is represented in humor, from classic one-liners to cartoons about the teams of Detroit. Make sure to check it out for good laughs about the teams in Detroit, Oklahoma, Baltimore and Minneapolis!
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Funniest Detroit Short Jokes
Short detroit jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The detroit humour may include short city jokes also.
- Why does the population of Detroit never change? Because as soon as a baby is born, some guy leaves town.
- Detroit is a such a dangerous city... You can't even let your kids out at night.
The might rob someone. - I was travelling on the West Coast when I saw a bumper sticker on a parked car that said: "I miss Detroit" ...so I broke a window, stole the radio, and left a note that said, "Hope this helps."
- me "Please to meet you, I am from East Detroit" Other person: "Oh my gawd, have you ever seen someone get shot"
Me: "No I close my eyes when I pull the trigger" - Why is a Detroit Lions fan the easiest to date? Her standards are so low, because every year she gets disappointed by 55 men.
- Henry Ford owned a brothel He packed the brothel with the most beautiful women in Detroit. Any man could come in and take one out on a date. They were known as the Ford Escorts.
- Someone threw a dollar coin at the mayor of Detroit Police are trying to figure out if it's assault or a bailout package.
- Why did all the Black people move to Detroit? Because they heard there were no jobs there.
- What do you call a group of people who are trying to rebuild after a major disaster? The Detroit Tigers.
- What do Detroit and the Olympics have in common? You hear a gunshot and see a bunch of black guys running
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Detroit One Liners
Which detroit one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with detroit? I can suggest the ones about detroit lions and eastern.
- What do you call fifty guys watching the Super Bowl? The Detroit Lions.
- The United States ruined Hiroshima. Which American city did Japan ruin? Detroit
- Lost job and no money for buy potato.
Also is cold.
Regret immigrate to Detroit. - Who's your daddy? A roleplay exercise in Alabama, a serious question in Detroit.
- Without crossing any lines, what's an offensive joke? The Detroit Lions
- Did you hear about the kidnapping in Detroit today? He woke up a half hour later
- When Transformers was filmed in Detroit Michael Bay had to use CGI to repair buildings
- What is the people mover in Detroit? A bulldozer.
- What do you call 53 men watching the Superbowl on TV? The Detroit Lions
- Whats the worst part about a black out in Detroit? All the pairs of floating eyes
- My grandpa has the heart of a lion He's not allowed back into the Detroit Zoo.
- What is the most confusing holiday in Detroit? Labor Day.
- watch.. Detroit Lions.. vs.. New York ..Jets ..live ..stream ..NFL ..video
- How would Jesus die if he was born in Detroit? In a crossfire.
- What state is Detroit in? A bad shape.
Detroit Lions Jokes
Here is a list of funny detroit lions jokes and even better detroit lions puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What did the Detroit Lions fan say when they won the super bowl? Why, why did you wake me up? I was having such a nice dream!
- What do Billy Graham and the Detroit Lions have in common? Both can make 20,000 people stand up and yell, "JESUS CHRIST!"
- Detroit Lions are playing right now They're playing their greatest rivals, the Manhattan Refs
- In Detroit, The Lions get blown out by the New York Jets.... In New York, The Jets blow out you!
- The Detroit Lions have been given guns to subvert increasing violence in the area... ...local zookeepers fear the worst.
- The Detroit Lions. (Passed down through my family for generations).
- Detroit is winning the Super Bowl this year Just kidding, I should stop lion
- The Detroit Lions. (they play football)
Detroit Tigers Jokes
Here is a list of funny detroit tigers jokes and even better detroit tigers puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do possums and the Detroit Tigers have in common? Both play dead at home & get killed on the road.
- How do you make the Detroit zoo more exciting You mispronounce tiger.
Rib-Tickling Detroit Jokes that Bring Friends Together
What funny jokes about detroit you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean survey jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make detroit pranks.
Tonight, two candidates squared off in a head to head clash for supremacy. One of these candidates has to come out on top. The loser will go home, defeated.
The winner will face Detroit in the World Series
I was in Florida recently to visit a good friend...
and saw a bumper sticker on a parked car that read, "I miss Detroit."
So I broke the window, stole the radio, and left a note that read...
"I hope this helps."
My little sister asked me which state is Detroit in
I said, "Turmoil".
Three year old goes to prison.
A police officer was investigating a noise complaint coming from a daycare in downtown Detroit. The officer realized that it was just a three year old kid k**... and screaming because he didn't want to nap during nap time. The officer charged the child with resisting a rest, and took him to prison.
Shower s**... in Detroit
In a recent survey, people from Detroit have proved to be the most likely to have had s**... in the shower.In the survey, carried out for a leading toiletries outfit, 86% of Detroit residents said that they have had, if not enjoyed, s**... in the shower. The other 14% said they haven't yet served any time in prison.
I visited Detroit recently.
I love the smell of the ol' factories.
What's the most confusing day in Detroit?
Father's day.
Why are so many African Americans moving to Detroit?
Because they hear there are no jobs there.
What's the best thing about being a Cubs fan?
Not being from Detroit.
A recent study showed that 93% of the people in Detroit have had shower s**...
The other 7% have not been to jail.
Where's the safest place for shelter during a tornado in Detroit?
The Pontiac Silverdome, there hasn't been a touchdown there in years.
So Fidel Castro was once given a key to the City of Detroit...
That is not a joke. That actually happened.
David calls up his brother Mike to schedule their annual family trip.
He tells him they're leaving Saturday to go to Detroit. Mike asks, "wait a minute, why Detroit?"
David answers, "Well, you know that thing old ladies do, where they set up a map on a dart board, and wherever it lands is where they go?"
Mike couldn't resist a chuckle, and says back to him "Yeah, i know that one."
"Well, I missed and hit the trash can."
Febreeze
Two men were urban exploring in the ruins of Detroit on a windy day. As they walked past the old factories, one man smelled a strange smell.
He said to his friend, "This smells like rusting iron.".
His friend replies, "I agree, it smells like FeBREEZE."
The Detroit airport was my favorite airport until I realized...
I was in Detroit
Did you know that shot sizes are different in different places?
In most of the US it's usually 50mL but in Detroit it's usually 9mm.
Good news for Detroit - a major TV show just signed to do filming there!
Unfortunately, it's Survivor.
Detroit and the Olympics have one thing in common
My son says that Detroit: Become Human wont run on his console
That's weird, everyone usually run so fast in Detroit...
What do you call an Italian living in Detroit?
Spa-ghetto
What type of 'review' new iPhone got from the Detroit folks?
The Neg. one.
What do a Detroit p**... and off-brand fireworks have in common?
a cheap bang!
In the city, you ignore sirens and listen for gunshots. In the country, you ignore gunshots and listen for sirens.
In Detroit, you ignore both.
In china, they invented a machine that can capture thieves
They tested out the machine in china for a week and they caught 2 thieves. The following week the russians decided to test this machine in Moscow, they caught 10 thieves. Seeing the machine's success, the Mexican government wanted to try this in the City of Mexico, they caught 400 thieves. Then the Americans caught interest and decided to test the machine in Detroit... They stole the machine
Auto
John: "My uncle in Detroit tried to make a new kind of car. He took the engine from a Ford, the transmission from an Oldsmobile, the tires from a Cadillac, and the exhaust system from a Plymouth."
Dave: "Really? What did he get?"
John: "Fifteen years."
