destroys Jokes

funny jokes and hilarious destroys puns

The government reveals their new logo today....

The government reveals their new logo today, on a black background sit a magnificent image of a condom.

I guess it makes sense, seeings as how a condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of dicks, and gives you a sense of security while being screwed.

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The Govenment made a recent announcement.....

.......that it is changing the national flag to a CONDOM, because it more accurately reflects the government's political stance.

A condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security whilst you're actually being fucked!!

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Working in porn for the free sex is like working at Chipotle for the free burritos

Yeah, you're getting paid, but it destroys your asshole

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The government today announced that it is changing its emblem from an eagle to a condom because it more accurately reflects the government's political stance.

A condom stands up to inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security while you're actually being screwed.

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North Korean submarine accidentally destroys another North Korean submarine

Woops, wrong sub

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What's the difference between a mad engineer and a mad scientist?

The mad engineer builds an efficient, well-desined death ray and destroys the world in one blow.

The mad scientist builds his death ray and divides the world into three randomised groups: an experimental group to be killed, a control group to be spared and a group that is told they are dead to account for the placebo effect.

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The New National Symbol

The government today announced that it is changing its national symbol to a CONDOM because it more accurately reflects the government's political stance.

A condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, and gives you a sense of security while you're actually being screwed. It just doesn't get more accurate than that.

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A guy walks into a bar. . .

. . .And asks for a shot of vodka. The bartender tells him "You should come back here tomorrow we have a contest going on. Drink the most shots of vodka in 2 minutes and you win free shots for a year."

So the guy comes the next night and destroys the competition. Does 25 shots in two minutes. He stumbles out victorious and no one sees him for a few weeks. When he eventually comes back the bartender says to him "Hey champ, want a shot?"

The guy goes a little green around the gills. "No thanks, last time I blew chunks."

The bartender responds. "Hell man most of the guys blew chunks after 5 or 6 shots."

The guy just puts his head down and says. "You don't get it Chunks is my dog.

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Lord of the Rings is symbolic of Marriage

One ring rules your life, it slowly destroys you, and sometimes, death seems easier than continuing on.

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What's the difference between a mad engineer and a mad scientist?

The mad engineer builds an efficient, well-desined death ray and destroys the world in one blow.

The mad scientist builds his death ray and divides the world into three randomised groups: an experimental group to be killed, a control group to be spared and a group that is told they are dead to account for the placebo effect.

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Difference between Ellen Pao and Kim Jong-un.

One is tyrannical and ruthless dictator, who destroys each and every opposition and other is supreme leader of North Korea.

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Two house fires break out at noon on a Wednesday and destroys two families' homes. One family lives in a capitalist country and the other lives in a socialist country. Though the fires were nearly identical, only the family living in the socialist country dies in the fire...

Because in the capitalist country, the parents had jobs and the kids were in school.

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A superhero who destroys his victims with horrible innuendos

The PUNisher

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An apartment building with three floors...

There is an apartment building with three floors. A different family lives on each floor. Floor one a black family. Floor two a Mexican family. Floor three a white family. Unfortunately a tornado destroys the apartment building at 2:00PM, leaving only one surviving family. Which family survived? The white family ofcourse because the kids were at school and their parents were at work.

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It's double standards!!!!

When The Hulk goes off into a vicious rage and destroys everything, he's "Incredible."

But when I do it,

I'm, "an alcoholic."

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God creates man...

man creates phone

man destroys god

man destroys headpone jack

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The US Justice system is just like bleach

Works great for whites, destroys all color

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what type of cane

Made in USA is always late and destroys everything in its path?

The Hurry-cane

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What is love?

Love is our 7th sense that destroys all 6 sense
And makes the person nonsense.

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It's been said gambling destroys lives

Well I dont know, it's brought me and my family closer together.

We now all live in a bedsit.

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Anal cancer destroys the families of everyone who is afflicted with it.

It's wrecked 'em all.

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T cells

Killer T cells are where your immune system finds and destroys infected cells that have turned into virus-making factories.

Mr. T cells are where they pity the bacterial fools.

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School's an abusive relationship, it treats me like shit and mentally destroys me but I keep going back...

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A massive earthquake destroys a town

It was the earth's fault

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Why can't Ben Shapiro fly an airplane?

He always destroys the left wing.

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What do babies and girlfriends have in common?

One brings amazing joy and the other destroys your life ( not saying what is what)

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Working in Porn for free sex is like working in Chipotle for free buritos

Yeah you're getting paid but it destroys your asshole

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Love is the seventh sense

According to Genius William Sexfear,

Love is the seventh sense

that destroys all the other 'Six Senses'

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If CERN's Large Hadron Collider creates a black hole that destroys earth

would that make it a weapon of math destruction?

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The current law system is like bleach

It works great on whites...

but destroys colors.

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In Soviet Alberta

Environment destroys you!

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An elephant walks into a bar

and destroys it totally.

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What are the best Destroys puns and pranks?

Did you ever wanted to prank someone about Destroys? Well, here are the best jokes about Destroys to have fun with.

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