The Best 19 Derby Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Derby jokes. There are some derby destruction jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these derby kentucky derby puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Derby Jokes and Puns

Kentucky Derby

Watching the Kentucky Derby for the first time, I was surprised it was only a single race rather than a full event, but then again, they only want one race in Kentucky.

Derby winner Medina Spirit turned down an invite to Mira Lago...

...saying if he wanted to see a horse's ass he would have come in second.

My wife and I got married on the same day as the Kentucky Derby. I remember it because I was considering betting my life's savings on this one Filly.


I also considered putting money on the derby.

What do the Kentucky Derby and a wedding have in common?

They both have months of build up for 2 minutes of action.

So I saw Amy Schumer perform live...

The Kentucky Derby really is magical!

Favourite football/soccer teams

What's an arthroplasty surgeon's favourite football team? Ipswich Town

What's a jockey's favourite football team? Derby

What's a detective's favourite football team? Leads United

What's a fossil's favourite football team? S'underland

What's a stale meat's favourite football team? Oldham

What's a fit, balding person's favourite football team? Wigan Athletic

What's a pirate's favourite football team? Loot-on (Luton) Town

Tickets to the Kentucky derby are 1100$

If I wanted to spend 1100$ for two minutes of action, I'd hire a prostitute.

Derby joke, Tickets to the Kentucky derby are 1100$

Are you guys watching the Kentucky Derby?

Yay or neigh?

Why was the driver fired from the destruction derby?

He was accused of wreckless driving.

They call the Kentucky Derby the fastest two minutes in sports...

But they clearly haven't seen me start, then quit, a 5K.

I hate to beat a dead horse, but

If I've got enough money in the Kentucky Derby, you better believe I'll do what's necessary

You can explore derby automobile reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean derby autonomous dad jokes. There are also derby puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

In honor of the Kentucky Derby:

Horse Racing is very romantic. The horse hugs the rail, the jockey puts his arms around the horse, and you kiss your money goodbye.

My sex life (Dirty)

My sex life is like the Kentucky Derby, four hours of foreplay, and only 90 seconds of real action

What do you call the worst destruction derby car racer?


How do you know a blind man that goes to the Kentucky derby isn't racist?

He doesn't see race

Quagmire gay joke

You know what the difference is between the NBA playoffs and Kentucky Derby? Giggity.....two extra legs.

Derby joke, Quagmire gay joke

My friend stole a soapbox derby car...

It's all downhill from there.

"Oh my god! Sarah Jessica Parker is a competitive sprinter?!"

"Greg, calm down! This is just the Kentucky Derby."

Q: What do you call it when an honest politician rides a unicorn to victory in the Kentucky Derby? A: A Fairy Tale, there is no such thing as an honest politician

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the derby chevy jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working derby racehorse piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes