The Best 66 Dentist Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Dentist jokes. There are some dentist anesthetic jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these dentist bad dentist puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Dentist Jokes and Puns
I dated a dentist a while back,
She had the whitest teeth I ever came across.
When my dentist reminded me about my wife's sensitive gag reflex, we laughed and laughed about it for a while...
Then I remembered...................me and my wife have different dentists…
A woman smiling
Not my joke but wanted to post it here. A bit dry but I find it funny.
At a bar a woman keeps smiling at a man. Finally the man walk over to her.
Man: I would like to ask you to come over to my place.
Woman: Are you trying to pick me up?
Man: No. I'm a dentist.
I have the worst dentist in the world.
He even got a little plaque to prove it.
Little old lady goes to a dentist...
A little old lady goes to the dentist.
She walks in to the dentists office, sits down, drops her panties, and lifts her legs.
Rather flustered the Dentist says, "I'm sorry madam, I'm not a gynaecologist!"
She says, "I know you're not, I just need my husband's teeth back!"
What does the dentist of the year get?
A little plaque.
A man walks into a dentist's office and says "Doctor, you have to help me! I think I'm a moth!"
The dentist says, "I think you want the psychiatrist down the hall."
And the man replies, "Yeah, but your light was on."
I just had my first prostate examination
Worst dentist ever.
How did the dentist become a brain surgeon?
His hand slipped.
A man and wife are lying in bed...
The man says "hey honey, do you want to make love?"
She says "normally I would, but I have an appointment with my gynecologist in the morning, and that seems like it would be gross."
The man says "I understand" and rolls over.
After a few moments, the man rolls back over and asks "when's your next dentist appointment?"
At the dentist
The wife says, -I have to get a tooth pulled and I have no time for any anesthesia. Just pull the tooth out as quickly as you can so we can get going!
The dentist was really impressed, -You are indeed a brave woman! Which tooth is to be removed?
She turned to her old man, -Show him your tooth, dear!
You can explore dentist teeth reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean dentist dental dad jokes. There are also dentist puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Man visits a dentist with broken teeth
Dentist.:- how did you manage to break these three teeth. .?
Man:- my wife bakeda bread that was too hard.
Dentist.:- you could have refused to eat it
Man:- that's exactly how this happened...
An old woman walked into a dentist's office (mild NSFW)
took off all her clothes and spread her legs. The dentist said, ''I think you have the wrong room.''
''You put in my husband's teeth last week," she replied. "Now you have to remove them."
My dentist and orthodontist have the same name...
Isn't that coinci*dental*?
So a mentally disturbed man walks into a dentist's office.
He says, "Doc, you gotta help me! I think I'm a moth!"
"You think you're a moth??" the dentist asks.
"Yes!"
"Well you don't need a dentist... you need a psychiatrist."
"I know," says the man.
"Then what are you doing here?"
"Well, you're light was on, so..."
Dentist: This is gonna hurt a little. Me: Ok.
Dentist: I've been sleeping with your mom.
Why don't dentists display their awards?
Because they want to prevent plaque build-up.
LPT: If your dentist has no painkillers, ask him for Helium.
It will be hilarious when you scream.
A guy walked into a dentist's office...
A guy walks into a dentist's office and says, "I think I'm a moth."
The dentist replies "You shouldn't be here. You should be seeing a psychiatrist..."
The guys replies, "I am seeing a psychiatrist."
The dentist says, "Well then what are you doing here?"
And the guy says, "Your light was on."
Why do only 9/10 dentists recommend Crest toothpaste?
The last dentist is busy killing a lion
The Dentist says, "When was the last time you flossed?"
The Patient replies, "You should know, you were there!"
Heard this at the dentist this morning
A woman goes to the dentist....
and the dentist says "Looks like you need to have a tooth pulled." The woman says "I'd rather have a baby."
The dentist looks at her and says "Make up your mind, I'll have to adjust the chair."
Why are dentists really good hackers?
Because they always get root access.
As a couple gets into bed, the husband starts to rub and kiss his wife.
She turns over and says, "I'm sorry, honey. I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow, and I want to stay fresh." The husband sadly turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife. "Do you have a dentist appointment, too?"
Why do dentists only want to be awarded with paper certificates?
They hate plaque buildup.
So my dentist says to me...
So my dentist says to me, "you're the cleanest patient I've had all week!"
Then I respond, "Wow I deserve a plaque!"
This literally just happened. She lost it.
I'm a moth
I walked into a dentist's office. The dentist asked me what the problem was.
I said, I'm a moth.
The dentist said, You're a moth?
I said, Yes! I'm a moth. I act like a moth. I think like a moth. I'm a moth!
The dentist said, Sir, I think you want the psychiatrist's office. He's two doors further down the hall.
I said, I know. I was on my way there, but your light was on.
I went to the dentist.
I sat down in the chair and he said, "Open up for me..."
"OK," I said, "my parents don't love me very much."
It's in the Smile
A boy met a girl....
Girl: Every time you smile, I feel like inviting you to my place.
Boy (smiling): Why thank you... are you single?
Girl: No, I am a dentist.
A man goes to the dentist with some broken teeth...
The dentist asks the man what happened, to which the man responds saying:
"My wife cooked some chicken and roti (Indian flatbread) but the bread was very hard and stiff."
The dentist replied: "You should have told her the bread was too hard and refused to eat it"
To which the man responds:
"Man, that's exactly what I did!"
(A joke originally told to me by my grandfather in Urdu)
A man goes to the dentist for a check-up
"Uh oh" the dentist says, "looks like your denture plate is eroding a bit. Have you been eating any new foods lately?"
The man thinks for a moment and says "you know, my wife has been using a lot of hollandaise sauce lately. She's been putting it on every dish."
"Ah, that explains it" the dentist replies. "We'll have to make you a new denture plate, but this one will need to be made of chrome."
"Chrome?" The man asks in surprise. "Why chrome?"
"Well, you know what they say", replies the dentist.
"There's no plate like chrome for the hollandaise"
A guy walks into a dentist's office and says, "I think I'm a moth."
The dentist replies "You shouldn't be here. You should be seeing a psychiatrist..."
The guy replies, "I am seeing a psychiatrist."
The dentist asks, "Well, then what are you doing here?"
The guy says, "Your light was on."
i just got my first prostate exam
and im never going back to that dentist again
Dentist: This will hurt.
Patient: OK.
Dentist: I've been having an affair with your wife since last year.
My doctor checked my prostate last week
It was the worst dentist appointment of my life.
My dentist told me to open up....
so I started telling him how depressed I was.
My dentist asked me the last time I flossed
I replied, "You remember.. You were there.."
Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin meet with guests at the White House
One of the guests asks: Mister President, what are you talking about with president Putin? – We are planning World War III.' - 'And what does it look like?' – Trump: We will kill 4 million Muslims and a dentist... The guest looks a bit confused: Why a dentist? - Putin claps Trump on the back and says, What did I tell you, Donald? No one will ask about the Muslims.
Doctor of death!
Impressively, only 2% of the people I operated on died last year. But for some reason the authorities think that's too high for a dentist.
Why did the Oreo cookie go to the dentist?
Because he lost his filling.
Teacher asked kids to tell her what they liked the most about her and she would tell them who they would be when they grew up.
Sally : I like your hair teacher!
Teacher: well, you're going to be a hair stylist!
George : I like your teeth teacher!
T : Well, you're going to be a dentist.
Then little Johhny jumps out of his seat and yells : I already know what i'm gonna be!
T : well, tell us.
Johhny : A milkman!
I went to the dentist today
Dentist: Open up please
Me: Sometimes I get sad.
The dentist said, "You need two root canals. They'll be expensive, but I'll let you pay...
..for them for $500 a month for 36 months."
I said, "Wow, those sound like car payments."
"They are."
Dentists are racist and homophobic.
They want to make your teeth white and straight.
My dentist mocked me today, saying that even though he's much older than me, he has healthier teeth.
I said it must be because he has the better dentist.
Dentist: This will hurt a little.
Patient: OK.
Dentist: I've been having an affair with your wife for a while now.
Why did Donkey Kong go to the dentist?
He had tooth DK
My dentist asked me how long it had been since I flossed
I said you should know that, you were there .
Will Smith teeth joke
Jason Derulo classic golf moves leaving Will Smith with no front teeths !
Three guys just met eachother and they have a conversation about different sorts of paste
The first guy says: "I know everything about tomato paste, because I own an Italian restaurant."
The second guy says: "I know everything about toothpaste, because I am a dentist."
The third guy says: "I know everything about copy-paste, because I am a Redditor."
My dentist said my teeth were stained and then asked me "Do you smoke or drink coffee?"
I said ... "I drink it"
When my dentist reminded me about my husband's sensitive gag reflex, we laughed and laughed and laughed about it for a while, but then it hit me....
We have different dentists...
If dentists make all their money from bad teeth...
....why should we use toothpaste that 8 out of 10 dentists recommend.
My dentist told me "This might hurt a little bit. Are you ready?"
I said "Yes, I'm ready."
He said "I'm sleeping with your wife."
a graphic designer, an astrophysicist, a dentist and an electrician walk into a bar
it was queen and they were playing their first gig
My dentist was voted "Dentist Of The Year"....
He didn't get a trophy, they just gave him a little plaque.
The dentist said "This might hurt a bit...are you ready?"
The patient said "Yes I'm ready"
The dentist said "I slept with your wife"
A man picks up a girl at a party. They proceed to her place and things start to heat up....
He takes his shirt off and then washes his hands. He takes his pants off and washes hands again. After watching this for a few minutes, the girl says, "I bet you're a dentist." Surprised he replies, "That's correct. How did you know?" "You keep washing your hands, so I figure you're used to it ..." They go on and have sex and then afterward she says, "You know what? I'm willing to bet you're a very good dentist." "Oh? How can you tell?" he asks. "Well, I didn't feel a thing..."
How do dentists pay for their lawyers?
Retainers
Doctor's know...
"Doc, there's something strange going on, it's not normal."
Doctor asks "What do you mean?"
"Whenever I fart it sounds like I'm saying 'Honda'."
Doctor says "Go see your dentist, you've got a cavity."
So he goes to the dentist, and sure enough he has a cavity. Dentist fills it and, just like that, his farts sound normal again!
He calls his doctor: "Doc, you were right! I had a cavity, and once it was filled my farts were normal again! But you gotta tell me, how did you know?"
"Doctors know that abscess makes the farts go Honda".
I finally got to go to the dentist for the first time since the pandemic started…
The doctor was shocked at how clean my teeth were but said my breath smelled like shit and he couldn't figure out why.
He asked if I'd been brushing regularly and I said yes.
He asked if I flossed regularly and I said as much as I normally do.
He asked if I changed my diet and I told him it was the same as it always was.
After sitting there for a moment, he looks at me and asks:
Doctor: Is there anything that's changed?
Me: Well…I did get a bidet and I haven't quite figured out the water pressure.
My Dentist asked me when's the last time I flossed
Me: Oh don't you remember? You were there!
Crown for me
Dentist: "You need a crown."
Me: "Finally someone who understands me."
Why do dentists never lie
Because the tooth always comes out
Husband and wife are in bed and the husband starts in on the foreplay.
She stops him and says even though she wants to, she can't tonight. Why not asks the husband. Cause I have an appointment with the gynecologist tomorrow and I want to be nice and fresh.
Alright says the husband. He sits there for a moment and then says.
Well you ain't going to the dentist tomorrow are ya?
A lady goes to the dentist...
... he looks in her mouth and says "that tooth needs to come out".
She says "oh no I'd rather have a baby than have a tooth pulled!!"
He says "ok but make up your mind I need to adjust the chair"
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the dentist dentist knock knock jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working dentist female dentist piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.