Denial Jokes

Following is our collection of refuse puns and onetwothree one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Denial jokes for adults, dirty thames jokes and clean acceptance dad gags for kids.

The Best Denial Puns

Breaking: Donald Trump has just won another state.


Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance

Saturday, Sunday

There's no "i" in denial.

Egyptian alcoholics are the hardest to talk to.....

They are always in denial.

I'm canoeing in Sudan, not Egypt - my map must be wrong

I guess I'm just in denial

It's been 5 months since my best friend drowned in a river in Egypt.

....and he's still in denial.

Bernie Sanders was asked why he is still in the race

and he responded "there are still some states left for me." Those states are Denial, Anger, Grief, Bargaining and Acceptance.

Did you hear about the Egyptian who refused to accept that he was drowning?

He was in denial

Two Rastafarians go to the river in Egypt and one of them gets in and says "Ey, mon, me not get wet"; his friend replies

"Ya right, mon, you in denial"

I once fell into an African river but refused to accept it

I was in denial

My friend and I took a trip to Egypt. While we were sightseeing, he slipped and fell into a river. I told him he needs to get out as soon as possible but he refused to acknowledge his predicament.

He was in denial.

Breaking News: Trump has won another state!

The state of denial.

A preschool teacher is teaching a student basic geography

Teacher: "what state do you live in?"

Student: "denial."

There is no I

In denial.

I was in denial until her wake...

But then I saw her face... now I'm a bereaver

my wife tried to tell me that I'm in denial...

So I told her to go back to school and learn geography because I'm standing nowhere near a river in Egypt

An old Egyptian pharaoh drowned himself when he learned the new, younger pharaoh was taking over...

He was in denial.

2016 Denial

2017 Anger

2018 Bargaining

2019 Depression

2020 Acceptance

When I told my friend how my dad drowned in the longest river on earth, he didn't belive me.

He was in denial.

Where would you find an Egyptian psychopathic swimmer?

In denial.

My friend told me "the first stage is grief"

"Isn't it denial?" I replied.

"No, not for me"

Yesterday I thought I was in the Amazon river

Turns out I was in denial

My friend just went to Egypt

He had a break up and now he's in denial

My wife left me because she believes I live in constant denial

Tonight we'll have a romantic dinner celebrating our 5th year anniversary

Me: The first step to success is denial.

Other person: No it's not.

Me: I'm so proud of you.

1. Denial 2. Anger 3. Bargaining 4. Depression 5. Acceptance ...

The 5 stages of buying petrol.

I thought I might be an alcoholic, so I did some research. It turns out the first sign of alcoholism is denial...

So I guess I'm not an alcoholic.

Fishy tales

Why couldn't the Egyptian fisherman get over the fact that his boat had sunk?

Because he was stuck in denial.

What do you call a Jamaican who goes swimming in Egypt?

In denial

Did you hear about the Egyptian murderer who evaded capture by jumping into a river?

Police said he was in denial.

I know a guy who takes denial to the next level.

He doesn't believe in stairs.

There's no "i"

in denial.

Did you know it's Holocaust Denial Month?

Happy JewLie.

Why was Cleopatra sitting on a boat, sad, going down a river?

Because she was in denial.

My roommate seemed like he was in denial when I told him I spilled all his protein powder...

...he just kept saying "no whey, no whey"

There's no "I" in..


I asked my brother if he has a fetish for rivers...

He's in denial.

There's no E in denial

And no I in Elleterate

I grew up in Egypt and was thrown in a river as a baby, but I never believed it.

I was in denial.

Why was Cleopatra so negative?

Because she was queen of denial.

There's no I...

in collaboration.

Or denial.

My Egyptian friend's dad drowned yesterday...

He's still in denial.

What do you call Cleopatra when she's depressed?

The Queen of Denial.

I can't believe that Fisherman told me there were no rivers in Africa

He was clearly in denial

Why didn't the Egyptian woman think she was pretty?

Because she was in denial.

What do you call a river that refuses to see the truth?


Breaking news! Due to heavy storms, all the rivers in Egypt are flooding.

The citizens of Cairo are still in denial

My friends say im in denial

I dont know what theyre talking about.

A little doctor joke

Patient: Doctor, I keep thinking I'm in a large African river!

Doctor: Ah, you must be in denial.

A man is having a session with his therapist.

Therapist: One of your biggest problems is changing the subject all the time.

Man: No I don't.

Therapist: Denial.

Man: Thats a river in Africa.

Cleopatra fell out of her boat but wouldn't admit she was wet.

She was in denial.

What do you call a river that thinks it's not a river?


Did you hear about the Pharaoh who refused to believe that his boat was sinking?

He was in denial

There is an abundance of pharaoh jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 53 funniest jokes and denial puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any nile witze you can hear about denial.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

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