Following is our collection of purgatory puns and ghoul one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Demon jokes for adults, dirty headstones jokes and clean heaven dad gags for kids.
Pepper-oni.
They show possession.
Posession
...Because they hate getting exorcised.
Her mother frantically calls their priest, requesting an exorcism. She describes the details "She has been spinning about wildly, climbing on the walls, running on the ceiling.. moving about non-stop!" The priest replies "I don't know what you want me to do. Sounds like she's already exercising plenty!"
You exercise it.
Mat Demon
His wife decides to teach him a lesson by dressing up like Satan and scaring him.
When he finally stumbles across the lawn, his wife jumps out and howls like a demon.
He looks at her and slurs, "You don't scare me. I'm married to your sister!"
They were demanding change.
My wife was furious and told me not to treat her mother like that
If a millennial asks you why people in old photos have red eyes
Tell them that they're too young to remember the demon uprising of the 1980s
Because they hate exorcising.
You exorcise him.
So I really need to start exorcising.
... then I got a divorce.
Demon free since 2003.
To prove it he had a glass of each. He dropped a worm into the water and it wiggled about. He dropped a worm into the whiskey.
Stone dead.
A person at the back jumped up shouting, "I'll have the whiskey Vicar! I've been having trouble with worms all my life
Asking for a fiend
Gandalf immediately froze in fear. It was what he had feared since entering Moria.
With each horrific step, the bells jangled damnation.
That's the jingle bell, muttered Gandalf.
Step.
That's the jingle bell.
Step.
That's the jingle Balrog.
She went to her priest, desperate to relieve herself of this burden. After a few silent rituals, she was rid of the demon. As she was exiting though, the priest extended his hand, signifying he was due payment. The woman replied, "Oh, but father, I have no money!"
She was repossessed.
He was charged with possession.
I'll succubi.
Whats the difference between a normal exorcism and an Irish exorcism??
A normal exorcism you call the priest up to banish the demon out of the child.
An Irish exorcism you call the demon to banish the priest out of the child... :D
Two counts of possession
Because the priest knew how to exorcise
Exercise.
Demonetization.
They get on the succubus.
It follows It Follows.
With the succu-bus
Mark zuccubus
Call a shrexorcist!
When I asked him why he looked at me saying, "I am eating your sole"
They're asking everyone to believe in bull oni.
"Demons should take good care of their possessions and not leave them out after they're done playing with them."
You cannot get PTSD if you ARE the traumatic event
The doctor said he just needed to go outside and get some exorcise.
Look for the one that's ember-assed.
Make him run a lap then do 10 push-ups and sit-ups
"In or out," says the bartender. "Just stop with the damned door."
...make demon ale.
El Disablo
They charged him with possession.
He exorcises
There is an abundance of judgment jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 43 funniest jokes and demon puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any succubus witze you can hear about demon.
Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.