Democratic Jokes

Following is our collection of funnies and chistes working better than reddit. They include Democratic puns, dirty or clean gags suitable for kids, that are actually fun like the best witze.

The Best jokes about Democratic

Trump, Merkel and Kim Jong-un are in the Middle East being chased by ISIS:

Trump turns to them and shouts: "Stop chasing us and I'll pay you a million dollars!" The terrorists continued.

Then Merkel turns to them and shouts: "Stop chasing us and I'll give you German citizenship!" The terrorists still kept chasing.

Then Kim Jong-un turns and shouts: "You are about to cross the border into the People's Democratic Republic of Korea. Welcome!"

The terrorists screamed and turned to run away.

I Hear that Russia is so mad about the US airstrike in syria

That they are seriously considering voting democratic in the next election.

You want to know what's the most unrealistic thing from Batman V superman? (not a spoiler)

A democratic senator from Kentucky.

This is a very old joke that I'm sure most people have heard.

One day George W. Bush was walking through Washington when he spotted a boy selling week old "Republican Puppies", delighted he resolved to come back with reporters in a few weeks for his campaign. When he came back the boy was now selling "Democratic Puppies". Disgruntled he asked why and the boy said,
"They used to be Republican Puppies, but now they've opened their eyes."

Why isn't North Korea democratic?

Because Kim Jung Un doesn't want a public erection

A Republican walks up to a Democratic with a face mask and say, do you know what I say to sheep like you?...

Whatever the Republican Party tells me too say.

Bernie Sanders joins list of 2020 Democratic Presidential candidates.

Err sorry, typo. That should be:
Bernie Sanders joins list of 2,020 Democratic Presidential candidates.

I heard on the radio that protestors in Beijing are demanding authentic democratic reforms.

Unfortunately, all they can get is cheap Chinese knockoffs.

An Economist went to a lingerie shop

to buy a bra for his wife. While he proudly announced to the Salesgirl that he is an Economist, he also confessed that only thing he knows about bra is 'how to unhook', and he really needed some expert help in making the purchase.


The smart Salesgirl asked, "Sir, you want a capitalistic, socialistic or democratic bra?"


Of course, our Economist was intrigued and he asked, "What are they?"


Salesgirl : "Sir, capitalistic suppresses the masses, socialistic uplifts the downtrodden and democratic makes mountains out of molehills."

Kid Rock announced he won't be running for the Republican Michigan Senate nomination .

This come as a great relief to Democratic challenger Kid Scissors.

Did you guys hear about the new death camps in North Korea?

No you didn't. You haven't heard anything. Long Live the Democratic People's Republic of Korea.

Why are there no chairs in the Democratic National Headquarters?

Because everyone is left leaning.

We haven't heard from the Democratic nominee in a while

Seems like he's Biden his time

What's the difference between a democratic system and a feudal system?

In one your vote counts, in the other, your count votes.

Did you hear? If the democratic candidate wins the white house...

the president will be taking a pay cut. It works out to be about 22%.

How many parties does it take to run a democratic nation?

Two, one to... just kidding you can't run a democratic nation on two parties.

What does John F. Kennedy have in common with the current Democratic Party?

No brains

The Democratic National Committee

Democratic. You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

I like this new Democratic candidate, Pete Buttigieg. Some people think he's not experienced enough...

But it's my vote, so I'll Buttigieg of that.

I think we all know Lincoln Chaffee won the Democratic debate last night.

Iran has finally reached out to America politically

Concerned for its citizens, they want to send over a few election monitors to ensure a fair democratic election occurs without fraud.

Democratic Difrence Between Usa & India

Democratic Difrence Between Usa & India. In Usa U Can Kiss In A Public Place But Can't Susu. In India U Can Susu In Public Place But Cant Kiss.

What do you call a conservative acting as a mole in the Democratic party?

A decepti-con.

What does a democratic magician wear?

Appointed Hat.

A North Korean farmer is finally rewarded after fifty years of hard labour for the State

A party official visits the farmer in his simple living quarters and proclaims

"Comrade, for your hard work and absolute dedication to the great leader and the Democratic People's Republic, we would like to reward you with a car"

The humble farmer nods silently to show his appreciation, the party official continues;

"As you know, North Korean industry is the the most powerful and efficient in the world, and as such we will have your car delivered to you in exactly 8 years"

The humble farmer then signals to the official to wait, and he crosses the room to check his calendar. After flipping through for some time he finally says;

"Morning or afternoon?"

The party official is rather offended, and remarks "comrade, you are being given a car! And that privilege aside, delivery is 8 years away, what does it matter if its morning or afternoon?"

To which the farmer responds "Well, the plumber is coming in the morning..."

"A leader in the Democratic Party is a boss, in the Republican Party he is a leader." Harry S. Truman

The Boss was complaining in our staff meeting the other day that he wasn't getting any respect.

The next day, he brought a small sign that read:

I'm the Boss!"

He then taped it to his office door.

Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note to the sign that said: -

Your wife called, she wants her sign back!"

"By 2040, 70% of Americans will live in 15 states, which means that 30% of Americans will elect 70 of the 100 senators."

America is Democratic.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends.

Joko Jokes