The Best 35 Democrat Republican Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Democrat Republican jokes. There are some democrat republican democrats jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these democrat republican election cycle puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 Funniest Democrat Republican Jokes and Puns
The problem with Trump jokes:
Republicans don't think they're funny, and Democrats don't think they're jokes.
Comey: He's guilty
Democrats: He's guilty
Trump: I'm guilty
Republicans: We may never get to the bottom of this
Democrats are sexier than Republicans
A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "Is it true that Democrats are generally considered to be more attractive than Republicans?" he asks the bartender. "Well, have you every heard of a hot piece of elephant?" the bartender responds.
How are republicans and democrats like divorced parents?
They care more about you hating the other person than they do about your well-being.
So I've got some buddies...
They just so happen to be a high-ranking officials in Denver,Colorado. They're currently trying to get Republicans and Democrats to both agree to legalize medical marijuana to ease arthritis symptoms. I guess you could say I have friends in high places in high places in high places for joint support for joint support for joint support.
If A Democrat Wins, I'm Leaving,
If a Republican wins, I'm also leaving.
This has nothing to do with politics.
I just really want to travel.
This is a very old joke that I'm sure most people have heard.
One day George W. Bush was walking through Washington when he spotted a boy selling week old "Republican Puppies", delighted he resolved to come back with reporters in a few weeks for his campaign. When he came back the boy was now selling "Democratic Puppies". Disgruntled he asked why and the boy said,
"They used to be Republican Puppies, but now they've opened their eyes."
What is the one thing that Democrats and Republicans can agree on?
They should allow guns at the Republican convention
Those "Run Hillary, Run!" bumper stickers are selling incredibly well
Democrats put them on the back of their cars, Republicans put them on the front!
What did one passive aggressive republican say to the passive aggressive democrat?
I don't know, let me go check my Facebook feed.
You know what sucks the most about being a democrat in a republican household?
If you try to address the Elephants in the room, you end up making an ass of yourself
You can explore democrat republican republicans reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean democrat republican gop dad jokes. There are also democrat republican puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Finally, a fact both Democrats and Republicans can agree on!
"Anyone with half a brain knows Trump won."
I heard that Monica Lewinsky voted Republican this year.
The Democrats left her with a bad taste in her mouth.
On His Deathbed
On his deathbed, a lifelong Republican supporter suddenly announced that he was switching to the Democrats. I can't believe you're doing this. said his friend. For your entire life you're been a staunch Republican. Why would you want to become a Democrat now? Because I'd rather it was one of them that dies than one of us.
A Republican walks up to a Democratic with a face mask and say, do you know what I say to sheep like you?...
Whatever the Republican Party tells me too say.
What do condoms and taxes have in common?
Republicans are against them and democrats want more for schools.
A Democrat, a Republican and a guy with hemmerhoids walk into a bar...
They're all butthurt.
The difference between a Republican and a Democrat . . .
A Republican sees a man drowning 50 feet from the pier. He throws the man a 25 foot rope, and expects him to swim half way.
A Democrat sees a man drowning 50 feet from the pier. He throws him a 100 foot rope. Then lets of of his end.
A Republican and a Democrat found a magic lamp
The genie said "I will grant one wish per person". The Republican immediately jumped forward and said "I wish all Republicans and conservatives had their own planet, separate from all these libs." The genie nodded and the Republican vanished. The Democrat then asked "Are they all on their own planet?" "Yes" said the genie. "Are you sure? All of them?" The genie said "Yes" one more time. Then the Democrat said "I guess I'll just have a glass of water then."
An old Republican is on his death bed
\- I have a confession to make! I declare myself a Democrat now!
\- But... but... why? You hate democrats! You spent all your life fighting with them!
\- Because now one of them will die!
A man gets sick and, fearing he might have Covid, goes to get tested
When the results of his test come back he gets called in and the person asks him, first, are you a Democrat or Republican?
The man says, what? What does that have to do with anything?
Well, if you're a Democrat you've got Covid. But if you're a Republican it's just a hoax.
I try to reassure everyone I meet, Republican or Democrat alike - the cost of replacing Trump is actually not that high.
It is only 1 Pence.
Democrats have been really angry over the 2016 election results
The last time Democrats were THIS angry is when the Republicans took their slaves away
Looks like the Democrats were holding strong in the Midwest until the republicans got off work.
My grandmother voted Republican until the day she died.
Ever since then, she's voted Democrat.
I haven't seen the democrats this mad at republicans...
... Since they freed the slaves
What's the biggest difference between Republicans and Democrats?
Republicans sign their checks on the front, and democrats sign on the back.
Kid Rock announced he won't be running for the Republican Michigan Senate nomination .
This come as a great relief to Democratic challenger Kid Scissors.
Republicans and Democrats never agree on anything
Republicans said the temperature is -40° F
And democrats immediately said it was -40° C.
A guy walks into a store
He sees three brains on display.
One is a Libertarian Brain, priced at $250.
The second is a Republican Brain, priced at $275.
The third is a Democrat Brain, priced at $5,000,000.
The Guy asks the sales clerk, Man, why does the Democrat brain cost so much more than the other two? Clerk replies, Well, sir, that brain has never been used.
A gay Republican impregnants a Lesbian Democrat at a crazy house party. They decide to share custody of the child.
It was a bi-party-son agreement.
Did you hear Monica Lewinsky became a republican?
The democrats just left a bad taste in her mouth
A blind answer poll was made to dads everywhere, whether they liked Republicans or Democrats.
The only answer they got back was "Yes."
What do Republicans and Democrats have in common?
Epsteins island.
I sexually identify as half Democrat and half Republican
I'm bipartisan
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the democrat republican national convention puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working democrat republican republican candidate piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.
