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Delivery Driver Jokes

31 delivery driver jokes and hilarious delivery driver puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about delivery driver that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Delivery Driver Short Jokes

Short delivery driver jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The delivery driver humour may include short delivery man jokes also.

  1. What do a pizza delivery driver and a gynecologist have in common? They both get close enough to smell the goods but if they eat it they'll be in trouble.
  2. I had to fire my fruit delivery driver today I hate to let the mango but he was driving me bananas
  3. What's the difference between police officers and pizza delivery drivers? Pizza delivery drivers actually face consequences when their jobs aren't done right.
  4. A FedEx driver, UPS driver, and USPS driver walk into a bar... Nevermind, you wouldn't get the delivery from the FedEx driver.
  5. If OP was a Pizza Delivery Driver, how much would he make? Nothing because OP never delivers.
  6. I was fired from a pizza place only 6 hours in. They said I was a bad delivery driver, but could they know? I hadn't even delivered my first order yet.
  7. I had an interesting and deeply meaningful conversation with my UPS delivery driver Unfortunately there was a lot to unpack
  8. I slashed my Postal Delivery Driver's tires today I wanted to be sure *all* of my last minute packages had flat rate shipping.

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Delivery Driver One Liners

Which delivery driver one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with delivery driver? I can suggest the ones about delivery boy and truck driver.

  1. A delivery driver asked me what time it was… I said, Somewhere between 8am and 5:30pm .
  2. What do you call a delivery driver from an indian takeaway? A curryier.
  3. About to start a new job as a pizza delivery driver, any tips?
  4. What's it called when a delivery driver forgets to shave? UPS next day hair
  5. If you're a delivery driver and don't get a tip... You get shafted
  6. What do you call a Russian Coca-Cola delivery van driver? Idroppalotta Popoff
  7. Q: How do you get a UNC fan to leave your house? A: Pay the pizza delivery driver.
  8. What do you call an East-Indian Fed-ex delivery driver? A currier.

Cheerful Fun Delivery Driver Jokes for Lovely Laughter

What funny jokes about delivery driver you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean delivery service jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make delivery driver pranks.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

You m**... one pizza delivery driver, and then you have to m**... another pizza delivery driver.

That's the domino effect

Don't know what was wrong with the delivery driver this morning.

He was all smiles until I signed his touch screen thing, then he got all shouty and mad.
I was so scared I dropped my sharpie and just closed the door.

A lady gets some flowers delivered from her husband

She doesn't look as excited as the delivery driver thought she should be so he asks, 'don't you like the flowers?'
She replies, 'no I love them, it's just that now I'll be expected to lay on my back all weekend with my legs in the air.'
Delivery driver replies 'why not just use a vase?'

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Why do l**... make horrible delivery drivers?

They only focus on the box and ignore the package!

A new shipment of dark blue shirts arrived at the loading dock at work today.

My coworker and I checked the boxes and the shirts felt differently so we started asking questions like, what distributors is this? and who makes it? . Finally after a lot of questions we ask from who? . The delivery driver looks at us and shouts Scan the Navy in!

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

School Cafeterias

A cafeteria lady who has been on the job for many years is showing a new one through the ropes. She shows her the right portions of food to give out to students, what to serve on each day of the week, and all the other responsibilities of working in the school cafeteria.
Suddenly a garbage truck pulls up outside the school. The older cafeteria lady runs outside and starts yelling frantically at the driver. When she gets back in, the new cafeteria lady is confused. "Why on earth did you do that?" she asks.
"Because," says the older cafeteria lady. "That m**... never seems to learn. All deliveries are supposed to be made to the *rear!*"

Penguin Truck

So there's a truck driver with a very important delivery: penguins to be delivered to the zoo. Unfortunately, his truck breaks down and they are stranded in the middle of a desert. Luckily , a passer by has a pickup truck. So the truck driver flags him down and says: "here is $300. Go take these penguins to the zoo." So the driver goes and takes them. Later the truck driver sees the other driver, and following him are the penguins. The trucker is furious and shouts at him: "what are you doing?! I gave you 300$ you were supposed to bring them to the zoo!!" He replies:" I did! We had money left over so I brought them to the movies as well!"