Defective Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Defective jokes. Read defective deduction jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) that will make you laugh out loud.

Enjoy this list of puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these defective dysfunctional puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Unearthly Funniest Defective Jokes to Tickle Your Sides

A Russian goes to a watchmaker.

He says, "My clock is defective. It only goes 'tic...tic...tic...tic...' unlike the others, which go 'tic...toc...tic...toc...'."
"No problem", says the watchmaker, taking the clock from its owner.
He then shines a light in the clock's face and says menacingly, "We have ways to make it toc."

I came across a great movie about a semi-truck with a defective refrigeration unit that had to deliver a large shipment of meat.

Unfortunately, the trailer spoiled it.

TIL the company Tampax donates their slightly defective tampons to women's prisons

No strings attached

Two Parachutists

Two parachutists jumped out of a plane, they had headsets on so they could talk to each other on the way down.

One man's parachute opened, the other one's didn't.

The guy with the defective c**... was falling fast but appeared to be slowly and very calmly trying to figure out the issue. Appeared to be in no rush.

The other guy with the good c**... said Hey, you look so calm and collected. Why are you taking your time? Why aren't you panicking?

The guy with the unopened c**... said Hey, why should I rush? I've got the rest of my life to figure it out .

A parachutist is plummeting to Earth

Because her ripcord malfunctioned.

As she frantically pulls at the defective cord, she passes a man atop a stove traveling the opposite way.

She yells out to him, Hey, do you know how to fix a parachute!?

He replies back No! Do you know anything about repairing gas lines??

What do you call a defective dishwasher?

A feminist

What do you call a Private Investigator who is bad at his job?

A Defective!

Defective joke, What do you call a Private Investigator who is bad at his job?

Two blondes trying to light a match

After few failed attempts, the first one turned to her friend and said: maybe this match is defective
to which the first one replied: it was just working before you came

A blonde and her friend...

Are recently hired putting up siding on a house. They're working on opposite sides so the first one goes to check on the second. She watches as she pulls a nail from her bag, lookas at it, and throws it away. She hollers up and asks what that was about. The second blonde says some of the nails are defective. The point is facing the wrong way so she throws those out. The first blonde says, " You idiot! They aren't defective, they're for the other side of the house "

What do you call a broken police officer?

Defective

What do you call a firm yet defective b**...?

asphalt

You can explore defective shred reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean defective glitch dad jokes. There are also defective puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

I ordered a pair of sneakers from an online shopping site and found it to be defective.

Is that an e-shoe?

What section would a defective cabinet look for in a library?

Shelf help

I'm the leader of a group of shoddy private investigators.

I'm a directive defective detective.

The U.S. postal services came out with a new Donald Trump stamp. Although they received many complaints that they were defective!

After polling the public on how the stamp is defective, they figured out nothing was wrong with the stamp at all!

The americans were just not spitting on the right side!

Where do the Japanese store defective mannequin feet?

In bent-toe boxes.

Defective joke, Where do the Japanese store defective mannequin feet?

What does a statistician call a defective butter substitute?

A margarine of error!

Did you hear the one about the defective knife?

He couldn't cut it.

A Customer bought a parachute from me

I realised after selling it that it was defective.

He hasn't come back to return it.

I wonder if he has jumped to a conclusion of not coming back.

An American factory orders a shipment of a certain part from a Japanese factory.

They write a letter to warn their partners "Be aware of our strict standards, we only accept 3 defective parts per 10 000".

The Japanese reply: "We don't quite understand what do you need them for, but as per request, we manufactured three defective parts and attach them separately hereby"

My irony detector is defective.

It detects everything except irony.

I got one of those digital assistant things for Christmas, but I think it's defective

It refuses to open the pod bay doors.

I thought I'd invented a new type of soap, but it was defective.

I guess I'll need a new solution.

An infamous sleuth gets half of his deduction wrong.

He was a Defective.

My buddy said I shouldn't get mad because my can of WD-40 has a defective nozzle…

...but I told him, This stuff is indispensable!

I bought a defective pack of playing cards. It had only three suits and all the cards were jacks.

I'm still trying to get a refund from those heartless b**....

Defective joke, I bought a defective pack of playing cards. It had only three suits and all the cards were jacks.

What do you call a Chinese Transformer?

defective

What do you call a patent for a defective human?

Did you hear about the comedian who gave an old lady a defective piece of cooking equipment?

He's known for his deadpan delivery.

Hearing people talk about how amazing dads are and how their dad would do anything for them has always made me feel weird.

I must have received a defective model.

My father just called me super defective!

anyone care to be Watson?

Remember that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes that make girls laugh. Many of the defective kaleidoscope puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When a joke goes too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke becomes inappropriate.

We suggest you to use only working defective cord piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and make them laugh.

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