Following is our collection of funny Declare jokes. There are some declare pronounce jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these declare breach puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Epstein didn't kill hims Elf.
After getting off the plane in Sydney, the man waits to go through Australian customs.
"Do you have anything to declare?" asks the Australian customs officer.
"No" replies the British man.
"Do you have a criminal record?"
"I'm sorry, I didn't know that was still a requirement."
He said " I have nothing to declare but my genius. Oscar Wilde, 1882 ".
I replied "Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. Oscar Wilde, 1882 ".
Socialism: The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor
Communism: You give them to the government and the government gives you some milk
Fascism: You keep the cows and give the milk to the government, then the government sells you some milk
New Dealism: You shoot one and milk the other, then you pour the milk down the drain
Nazism: The government shoots you and keeps the cows
Capitalism: You sell one and buy a bull. Then put both of them in your wife's name and declare bankruptcy.
Environmentalism: You have two cows. The government bans you from milking or killing them
Totalitarianism: You have two cows. The government takes them and denies they ever existed. Milk is banned
Binaryism: You have 10 cows
It's official guys, meat is literally murder.
*Surrendre*
They do declare!
Declare that the US has a $900 million loss so we all don't have to pay taxes!
I don't know, who?
France surrenders
Italy changes sides
Both lose
France surrenders and Italy switches sides. Both countries lose.
You can explore declare profess reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean declare declaration dad jokes. There are also declare puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
A blonde goes to court.
Eventually the judge says: I hereby declare the case closed. There is not enough evidence that you stole the 10000 US$.
The blonde is thrilled: Gosh, so does that mean I can keep the money?
Customs agent: Do you have anything to declare today?
Me: *starts sweating* ummmmm no. *trips and falls. Hundred of Kinder eggs spill from my pockets, jacket and bag*
Customs agent: GET ON THE FLOOR NOW!
Me: But, I am -
*armed guards swarm around and pin me down*
Armed guards: WHAT'S IN THE EGGS!!!
Me: I don't know, it's a surprise!!
(Sorry if the formatting sucks. On mobile)
I was driving back to Canada with my family when we came to the border. After a short wait in line, we get to the guard booth, and he asks if I have anything to declare. With a sigh, I turn to my wife and say, "Honey, I want a divorce."
His aide said, "So what do think are some good ways to prevent it?"
Trump replied, "Prevent it?"
"After review, the receiver did not get two feet down."
Well, I do declare.
The only thing NASA has to do is declare war on Mars!
Traveller: Only an undying love of travel puns.
Border officer: ...You just crossed a line, kid.
With a white flag.
Declare him as Integer.
5, 6, 7, 8 loser is a buffer state.
"I'm so AUtistic!"
So this handyman was caught working without a license. He was a bit of a diy guy and had decided to fix some things himself, but wasn't licensed to do so and they weren't up to standard.
In the court, the judge received a note from his assistant and immediately declare him guilty for working without a license and for bribing.
Turns out he had done some jury rigging.
This is known as the Salmon Roe Doctrine
Because the cabin boy wouldn't share his booty!
WHO declared COVID-19 as a pandemic.
A British national travelling to Australia on holiday is stopped at customs after getting off the plane. There, the customs agent asks him, "business or pleasure?"
"Pleasure," he replies.
"Anything to declare?"
"Does jet lag count?" the Brit asks with a cheesy smile. The Aussie customs agent looks up, drearily, unamused.
"Do you have a criminal history?"
Suddenly, the British man becomes concerned, and looks around nervously.
"What's wrong?" the customs agent asks.
"Oh, I'm sorry," the brit replies. "No, I don't. I didn't realise we still needed one of those"
This is the first time in
english literature question
and answer both are same
Q:Who declared Corona
as a pandemic?
A: WHO declared Corona
as a pandemic.
"Remember the à la mode"
The fence is required to contain as much land as possible for the least amount of fence material.
The engineer says "easy, just make a circular fence"
The physicist says, "wait a second! If you build the fence across the equator you'll have an even higher area/fence ratio!"
The mathematician says "amateurs!". He gets up and builds a tiny fence around his feet and proclaims "I declare myself to be on the outside."
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the declare gunner jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working declare airspace piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.