The Best 44 Decades Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Decades jokes. There are some decades millennia jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these decades months puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Decades Jokes and Puns

Comedian Jeff Dunham has been accused of sexual assault

After allegations from his coworkers saying that he's been fisting them for decades.

Just look up his Youtube channel if you want to see evidence of this abuse. Millions have just sat by and watched while these poor souls suffered through tremendous pain right in-front of them.

'What Will Communism Be Like?'- A Russian Joke

One day, as a young man, Ivan asked a member of the Party, "What will it be like once we have built communism?". The Party man replied, "The shops will be full of goods, and we will have no money". Four decades passed, and the Soviet Union fell. After the fall of the USSR, Ivan found himself walking the streets of Moscow. He looked at the shops, and he felt in his pockets, and smiled. "Comrades", he said, "We have built communism at last!"

The fishing trip

So four high school friends have gone fishing together every year for the last two decades. That was until this year, when Jim had to inform the group he couldn't make it.

"Look, it's the wife. She's been saying I haven't been spending enough time with her."

Of course, the others were upset but told him they couldn't rearrange all the schedules to make it work out this year, so they stuck to the date.

The morning of trip, the guys are unloading on the dock when Jim comes running up with his stuff.

"What's the deal, Jim?" asked one of the fishermen.

"So I came home from work last night and I found my wife in the bedroom. She was laying down with a spool of rope, some duct tape and a ball-gag, and told me how she's been reading *50 Shades of Grey*. She told me to tie her up and do anything I want. So, uhh, here I am!"

Decades joke, The fishing trip

When the Jews wandered in a desert for four whole decades,

surely it went from epic fail to epoch fail

After decades of intense research, scientists have finally figured out what a woman wants

Unfortunately, she's since changed her mind.


Hanging in the hallway at a high school are...

...the basketball team pictures from the past decades. A player in the center of the front row in each picture holds a basketball identifying the year -- "92-93," "93-94," "94-95," etc.

One day the principal spotted a freshman looking curiously at the photos.

Turning to the principal, he said, "Isn't it strange how the teams always lost by one point?"

The flag planted on the moon is now completely white, since it has been bleached by decades of cosmic radiation...

The US should replace the flag sometime soon, we don't want people to think the French were the first to complete a lunar landing!

Decades joke, The flag planted on the moon is now completely white, since it has been bleached by decades of cosmi

The French are such nice people. (would have been funnier a few decades ago)

Do you know why all of the streets in France are lined with trees?

The Germans like marching in the shade.

The secret of recent explosion of Antares rocket

The decades old Soviet rocket engines it used were engineered to fly TO America, not AWAY from it.

So Jeremy Clarkson's politically incorrect jokes got him fired from the BBC.

Great to see the institution which gave Jimmy Saville and Rolf Harris jobs for decades is really going after the bad people society.

I'm making a documentary...

I'm making a controversial documentary that reveals decades of covered-up sexual misconduct in youth tennis programs across the country. It's called *15 - Love*.

You can explore decades hundred reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean decades ago dad jokes. There are also decades puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


After decades of research scientists in Texas have discovered a new use for sheep!

Wool!

Yo momma's privates are like Mars...

It took a team of scientists decades to find moisture on it.

My wife saw her ex high school boyfriend, drunk in the street. She said he started drinking when she broke up with him after graduation decades ago. I said....

....Impressive. .. I've never seen anyone celebrate that long before.

Prince's housekeeper of 30 years was offered a job as a crime scene investigator.

She was considered highly qualified due to her decades of experience dusting for Prince.

After spending over 3 decades in the hard candy business, I've had enough...

I've finally realized it's for suckers.

Decades joke, After spending over 3 decades in the hard candy business, I've had enough...

An Englishman, an Irishman, a Welshman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar.

Then a few decades later they walk out again squabbling among themselves.

I'm sick and tired of those who say Hillary has no great accomplishments....

I would say staying out of prison for the crimes she committed in the last four decades is a great accomplishment.

The best soccer team in the world

We will put gays as defenders, since they pressure well from the back.

Arabs, Chinese and Caucasians in mid because they bring color to the field.

Jews will be attackers because it's frowned upon to chase them.

And a 50 year old nun as our goalkeeper.
Because she hasn't let anyone in for three decades straight.


I like my women like I like my whiskey

Stuffed in a barrel that remains untapped for decades.

UNC received no sanctions for their decades of cheating...

...but they're forced to keep their football team.

For decades I've always liked Kevin Spacey

Turns out he stopped liking me decades ago

A hundred year old woman from Texas was asked the secret to longevity.

On her birthday the local news came by and asked her the secret to long life. She said that every morning she takes a shot of whiskey and a spoonful of gunpowder with her breakfast. Her family agreed that every day for decades she had downed a spoonful of gunpowder. She died not long after this of natural causes. She left her house to her kids, her money to charity, and a fifty foot crater where the crematorium used to be.

Nice job Elon, it took decades of hard work and determination but you actually launched that car into space. Well done you! Two words though

decoy snail

After decades of fighting his terrible cigarette addiction, my grandfather finally stopped

breathing

Although the cannibalism of the praying mantis may seem severe, it is thankfully brief. In other species, the female will slowly suck the life out of her partner over a period of decades.

This process is commonly called marriage.

Historically, the Inuit are one of the few groups of people who never lose their temper. After decades of research, scientists were able to figure out why...

They're nomads.

A short true tale about Ireland, quiz-shows and Hitler

Decades ago when I lived on the rocky coast of West Cork, there was a quiz show called "Quicksilver". It had a top prize of something like $1.25 (perhaps a bit more), and the contestants were just average people. In one show the contestant was asked for Hitler's first name. He thought about, smiled and said "Heil" He did not win his $1.25 but almost everyone in Ireland remembers the tale.

I imagine that being with a woman for decades is like having a balloon.

At first things are electric, but as time goes on, everything starts to sag.

Why does everyone always brag that they are going to go unplugged for a while

Wireless devices were invented decades ago.

New York City just went a weekend without a shooting fir the first time in decades

They'll have to make up next weekend

I yelled into the intercom at the grocery store

Why did I get kicked out when James Brown has been getting away with it for decades?

What do you call a book club that has been stuck on the same book for decades?

Church

Harper Lee made her own alcohol several decades ago, researchers found out it's called

Tequila Mockingbird.

What are these TV series about 2 musiciancs fighting against sharps and flats for decades?

Supernaturals

How many GOP congressmen does it take to change a light bulb?

Doesn't matter, light wasn't burnt out, they haven't had any bright ideas in decades to turn it on.

A Palestinian wakes up from a coma and is discovers he's been sleeping for decades.

He goes to the first person he sees and asks them Are the stories true? Is it real?

The man responds, Yes my friend, I'm afraid it Israel.

I don't know why people think throwing singles at children is the new viral trend...

Hollywood's been doing it for decades.

"Crystal ball, how much time do I have before I die?"

"Five..." said the image on the crystal ball

"Five what? Years? Days? Decades?"

"Four... Three..."

Decades later our kids would be asking us.

Dad, why did y'all have to write "do not drink" on a bleach bottle?

I've now been alive in six decades:

The 1980s
The 1990s
The 2000s
The 2010s
The 2020s
May

When I grow up and have kids in a couple of decades. I won't be worried when the day comes they ask for for the newest released M rated game. I'm confident I won't even need to play its unsuitable.

I mean I've played GTA 5 before.

When I send my child to school this fall they'll be decades ahead of their peer group

They'll die way before the rest of them.

A ship discovers a lost island in the South Pacific

To their surprise, the ship's company find the remains of a shipwreck there, a couple of decades old, and a single survivor, a Welsh mariner who has busied himself building an exact replica of a Welsh village, complete with a town hall, a pub, a rugby pitch, and two chapels.

"...Two chapels?" asks the ship's captain, and the castaway's face darkens as he nods in the direction of one of the chapels: "That's the one I don't go to."

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the decades fifties jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working decades dozen piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes