The Best 22 Dear Santa Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Dear Santa jokes. There are some dear santa naughty jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these dear santa misprinted puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Dear Santa Jokes and Puns

Dear santa...

Dear santa, this year, please send clothes for all those poor ladies in daddy's computer.

I made this one up today…. What is Santa's favorite weather?

It's rain, dear!

Dear Santa....

All I want for Christmas is a fat bank account and a slim body. Please do not mix it up like last year.

Dear Santa

I ask your help to cure my dyslexia by pledging my soul to thee, oh prince of darkness.

Dear Santa, Last year you gave me a sweater for Christmas.

This year I would prefer a Moaner or a Screamer.


What did Santa Claus say when Mrs. Claus asked him for the weather?

It's rain, dear!

WHAT DID SANTA SAY WHEN HE SAW HIS WET ROOF

It looks like rain dear

What did Santa say to Mrs. Claus when she asked him why he wanted to go to a strip club?

Because I want to make it rain, dear.

Dear Santa -- For 2017, all I want is a SLIM body and a BIG FAT bank account.

Please don't mix it up like last year.

Dear Kids, there is no Santa.

Those presents are from your parents.

Love, Julian Assange - *WikiLeaks*.

A little girl writes a Christmas letter to Santa

"Dear Santa, I want a fur coat and a scarf for Christmas." She goes to the post office and sends the letter. Next day the postman reads the letter and decides to give the girl a scarf for christmas. After christmas the postman gets another letter: " Santa, thanks for the scarf, but i bet the mailman took the coat!"

You can explore dear santa congratulations reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean dear santa log dad jokes. There are also dear santa puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


What is Santa saying to Mrs. Claus right now?

I told you it would rain, dear.

Note for Santa

Dear Santa,

Please give me a big fat bank account and a slim body. Please don't mix those two up like you did last year. Thanks.

What's the difference between Santa Clause, Kim Jong Un, and 34 ounces of printer ink?

One's a deer leader, one is a Dear Leader, and the other is a dear liter.

Eying the distant storm, Santa said to Rudolph:

"It's going to rain, dear!"

Get a brother

A little kids sends a letter to Santa that says: "Dear Santa I want a brother for Christmas." Santa writes back, "Dear Timmy send me me your mommy."

What did Santa Claus say to his wife after he watched the weather report?

It's going to rain dear.

^Yeah ^I'm ^sorry ^its ^late ^guys.

A Christmas Wish

Little Johnny wrote a letter to Santa,

Dear Santa Claus
Please send me a sister for Christmas

Santa wrote back,

Dear Little Johnny
Please send me your mother

Dear Santa,

Thank you so much for my new fap chair....

....or computer chair as they call them in Stores.


My 9-yr old daughter just told me this one.

What did Mrs. Claus way to Santa when she looked out the window?

It looks like rain, dear.

Kid: "Dear Santa, I want a younger brother for Christmas."

Santa: "Send me your mom."

A child writes a letter to Santa...

A child writes a letter to Santa. He writes " Dear Santa, I want a little sister for Christmas." Santa writes back to the child "Dear Billy send me your mom."

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the dear santa usps jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working dear santa santa tracker piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes