Dear Santa Jokes

28 dear santa jokes and hilarious dear santa puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about dear santa that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Dear Santa Short Jokes

Short dear santa jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The dear santa humour may include short santa christmas jokes also.

  1. Dear santa... Dear santa, this year, please send clothes for all those poor ladies in daddy's computer.
  2. What did Mrs. Claus said when Santa Claus asked how is the weather? "It looks like rain dear!"
  3. Dear Santa.... All I want for Christmas is a fat bank account and a slim body. Please do not mix it up like last year.
  4. Dear Santa I ask your help to cure my dyslexia by pledging my soul to thee, oh prince of darkness.
  5. Dear Santa, Last year you gave me a sweater for Christmas. This year I would prefer a Moaner or a Screamer.
  6. Dear Santa -- For 2017, all I want is a SLIM body and a BIG FAT bank account. Please don't mix it up like last year.
  7. Dear Kids, there is no Santa. Those presents are from your parents.
    Love, Julian Assange - *WikiLeaks*.
  8. Note for Santa Dear Santa,
    Please give me a big fat bank account and a slim body. Please don't mix those two up like you did last year. Thanks.
  9. What's the difference between Santa Clause, Kim Jong Un, and 34 ounces of printer ink? One's a deer leader, one is a Dear Leader, and the other is a dear liter.
  10. Get a brother A little kids sends a letter to Santa that says: "Dear Santa I want a brother for Christmas." Santa writes back, "Dear Timmy send me me your mommy."

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Dear Santa One Liners

Which dear santa one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with dear santa? I can suggest the ones about santa claus and mall santa.

  1. I made this one up today…. What is Santa's favorite weather? It's rain, dear!
  2. What did Santa Claus say when Mrs. Claus asked him for the weather? It's rain, dear!
  3. WHAT DID SANTA SAY WHEN HE SAW HIS WET ROOF It looks like rain dear
  4. What is Santa saying to Mrs. Claus right now? I told you it would rain, dear.
  5. Eying the distant storm, Santa said to Rudolph: "It's going to rain, dear!"
  6. Kid: "Dear Santa, I want a younger brother for Christmas." Santa: "Send me your mom."

Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Dear Santa Jokes with Friends.

What funny jokes about dear santa you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean dressed santa jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make dear santa pranks.

What did Santa say to Mrs. Claus when she asked him why he wanted to go to a s**... club?

Because I want to make it rain, dear.

A little girl writes a Christmas letter to Santa

"Dear Santa, I want a fur coat and a scarf for Christmas." She goes to the post office and sends the letter. Next day the postman reads the letter and decides to give the girl a scarf for christmas. After christmas the postman gets another letter: " Santa, thanks for the scarf, but i bet the mailman took the coat!"

What did Santa Claus say to his wife after he watched the weather report?

It's going to rain dear.
^Yeah ^I'm ^sorry ^its ^late ^guys.

A Christmas Wish

Little Johnny wrote a letter to Santa,
Dear Santa Claus
Please send me a sister for Christmas

Santa wrote back,
Dear Little Johnny
Please send me your mother

Dear Santa,

Thank you so much for my new fap chair....
....or computer chair as they call them in Stores.

My 9-yr old daughter just told me this one.

What did Mrs. Claus way to Santa when she looked out the window?
It looks like rain, dear.