Deaf Mute Jokes
52 deaf mute jokes and hilarious deaf mute puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about deaf mute that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Deaf Mute Short Jokes
Short deaf mute jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The deaf mute humour may include short deaf jokes also.
- There was a fight between a blind man, a deaf man, and a mute man I just have to ask, how long until we end this senseless violence?
- A tasteless joke. People who can't hear are called deaf.
People who can't see are called blind.
People who can't talk are called mute.
What do you call people that can't taste food?
Ethiopian - There was a deaf mute who said so many dirty words that his mother had to wash his hands with soap.
- Blind, deaf and mute people can all tolerate a dark joke. It's because they're not sensitive.
- Doctor: *panic* Disabled guy: Stands
Blind guy: did he just stand?
Deaf guy: did he just see?
Mute guy: did he just hear? - Did you hear about the shooting at the school for blind, deaf mutes? It was truly a senseless tragedy.
- What is logic? A mute telling a deaf guy that a blind guy saw a paraplegic running behind a bald guy while grabbing his hair.
- Did you hear about the deaf person who was cut up but was surprisingly happy about the whole thing? The headline was: Mutilated mute elated
- A criminal defense lawyer says "Don't talk" to his clients regarding interactions with law enforcement, except to his deaf-mute clients, to whom he says "Don't sign anything."
- Alfred: I can't hear the TV. Steve: I can't either, it's muted. Also, you're deaf.
Alfred: What?
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Deaf Mute One Liners
Which deaf mute one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with deaf mute? I can suggest the ones about blind deaf and deaf people.
- Two deaf-mute kids were arguing. The mother came and turned off the light.
- A deaf-mute man came on a talent show. And what is your talent?
- I can speak! - What did the deaf, mute, paraplegic get for Christmas? Cancer
- What did the blind deaf mute child get for Christmas? Cancer
- What do deaf-mute people like about yoga pants? They make lip-reading easier.
- What do you call a man who's blind, deaf, mute, and paralyzed? Probably dead.
- What do you call a deaf person with no arms? Mute
- What does an argument look like between 2 deaf-mute people? 2 drunk people dancing.
- What did the blind, deaf, mute quadraplegic boy get for Christmas?
Cancer. - What do you call a deaf traitor? A mutineer (mute-in-ear)!
- What did the mute dude tell the deaf man? That a blind guy was watching him.
- I like deaf mute pants for women... So I can read their lips better.
- What did the mute man say to the deaf man? Does it even matter?
- What do you cal a Deaf and Mute person? It doesn't matter. He's not going to come.
- What does deaf, mute and blind person get for christmas? Cancer
Deaf Mute Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about deaf mute you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean blind people jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make deaf mute pranks.
Yesterday I r**... a deaf-mute girl...
...I´ve broken her arms so she couldn´t tell anyone.
What does a deaf-mute kid with three fingers do?
Stutters
A few pen jokes
What's Lance Armstrong's favorite pen brand?
Uniball.
What's a Muslim's favorite pen?
Arab Bic.
What's a deaf-mute's favorite pen?
Pentel.
How do you stop a deaf mute girl from telling her parents you r**... her?
Break her fingers.
[Nsfw] How do a mute and a deaf person have consensual s**...?
They use hands and fingers.
m**...
A blind man, a deaf man and a mute are murdered.
These are senseless killings
What is worse than r**... a deaf-mute girl?
Breaking her fingers so she won't tell nobody.
A lawyer was travelling in an almost empty train.
A lady approaches him and says "Put everything you have in this bag or I'll shout that you are molesting me." The lawyer signals that he is deaf and mute and asks her to write what she just said on a paper. She does so. He smiles and keeps the paper in his bag and says "Now do whatever you want!"
What do you call a four-legged, three-eyed, mute, deaf, transgender, African-American, handicapped, e**..., cancer-riddled, rich, thrice-divorced, tired, fashionable, pansexual, elderly factory worker?
I don't know.
When you insult a deaf-mute m**... in sign language
...it's a deaf-sentence.
My deaf-mute postman has such a tough job. He starts work at 3am. In summer he gets attacked by dogs and in winter he has to brave through sub-zero temperatures. But in spite of all this....
I've never heard him complain
A mute guy, a deaf guy and a drunk guy walk into a bar...
The mute guy says
What are you guys having to drink?
The deaf guy realizes that the mute just somehow talked and asks him
How come you just spoke if you're mute?
The drunk guy starts to come to his senses about the situation that the supposed deaf guy somehow heard the supposed mute guy. He asks them,
Wait how come you just spoke when you're mute AND he just heard you when he is supposed to be deaf?!?
The bartender says,
Hey who's that drunk guy talking to?
A blind man, a deaf man, and a mute man like a woman
The blind man, to impress her, says: "If I could see anything, I wish I could see your face."
The deaf man says: "If I could hear anything, I wish I could hear your voice."
The mute man says: