Deadly Sins Jokes
16 deadly sins jokes and hilarious deadly sins puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about deadly sins that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Deadly Sins Short Jokes
Short deadly sins jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The deadly sins humour may include short deadly jokes also.
- Jesus died for your sins. But did He stay dead?
At most, He lost a weekend for your sins. - Eating too much cake is the deadly sin of gluttony But not eating too much pie, because the sin of pi is always zero.
- If there is one thing we can all agree upon about the Seven Deadly Sins... It's that Kevin Spacey labeled himself as the wrong one
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Deadly Sins One Liners
Which deadly sins one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with deadly sins? I can suggest the ones about three sins and mortal.
- Which of the7 deadly sins are lions guilty of? Pride!!
- What is bread's most deadly sin? Gluteny
- The seven deadly sins were having a Mexican stand-off... Greed-o shot first
Deadly Sins Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about deadly sins you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean sorrows jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make deadly sins pranks.
In a confession booth...
ME: I committed all seven deadly sins in 30 minutes.
PRIEST: Wow I gotta hear this.
ME: I was angry and envious at my neighbor so I lazily seduced his wife and ate all his groceries and I didn't share.
PRIEST: You forgot pride.
ME: No, Im pretty proud of this.
One morning, a priest gives a sermon on the Seven Deadly Sins
After the sermon, a guy goes up to the priest and says, "Father, thank you so much for giving that sermon. It meant so much to me, and I'll tell you why. I lost my hat last week and I couldn't find it anywhere. I finally decided to steal a new one from the store, but now that I heard your sermon, I'm not going to."
The priest smiles and says, "That's good, my son. The part about 'thou shalt not steal' moved you, did it?"
The guy says, "Nope. After that part about adultery, I remember where I left my hat."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Everyone who participates in pride month is going h**...
Not because they Are gay but because pride is one of the 7 deadly sins
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If you commit one of the seven deadly sins you should be punished.
If you commit all of them you should be a politician.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I'm always confused by gay pride parades.
Don't the g**... realize its a sin? One of the seven deadly ones, even!
An elderly woman had just returned
to her home from an evening worship service and was startled to find an intruder in her house.
Catching the man in the act of burglarizing her home, she yelled:
STOP! Acts 2:38! ( Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ so that your sins may be forgiven. )
As the burglar stopped dead in his tracks, the woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done.
Shortly, several officers arrived and took the man into custody.
As he was placing the handcuffs on the burglar, one of the officers asked:
Why did you just stand there? All the lady did was mention a scripture verse.
Scripture? replied the burglar. She said she had an axe and two 38's!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A priest and a nun are playing golf...
The priest is on the putting green and is an avid golfer. He lines up his shot and swings...and the ball goes far left.
"GOD d**...!" shouted the priest.
The nun, horrified, says "Father, you can't do that, that's offensive". And the priest, looking down, apologizes and asks for her forgiveness.
Once again, he walks up to the ball, lines up his shot, swings, and once again the ball misses the hole. "GOD....d**...!" screamed the priest as he threw his putter on the ground.
"Father!" said the nun, "You are taking the lords name in vain, that is a sin. You are a representative of the church you musn't do that.
And once again the priest says "Sorry. Forgive me".
"Well just try to let it not happen again" said the nun
The priest grabs his putter, lines up his next shot, misses, and screams "GOD d**...!"
The nun cries out "Father! That is enough! You are commiting a sin you are personally offending me, you are taking the lords name in vain. Never do that again"
The priest says "You're right, if I say that again, may the lord strike me dead"
And after a nod of approval from the nun, the priest takes another swing, misses once again, and screams "GOD d**...!"
Just as he says it clouds swell overhead and a powerful bolt of lightening comes down and strikes the nun dead. And the priest heard this big booming voice say....
"OH, GOD d**...!"