Deadly Sins Jokes

19 deadly sins jokes and hilarious deadly sins puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about deadly sins that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Deadly Sins Short Jokes

Short deadly sins jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The deadly sins humour may include short deadly jokes also.

  1. Jesus died for your sins. But did He stay dead?
    At most, He lost a weekend for your sins.
  2. Eating too much cake is the deadly sin of gluttony But not eating too much pie, because the sin of pi is always zero.
  3. 7 deadly sins Eating too much cake is a sin of gluttony, but eating too much pie is okay because the sin of pi is always zero.
  4. If you commit one of the seven deadly sins you should be punished. If you commit all of them you should be a politician.
  5. If there is one thing we can all agree upon about the Seven Deadly Sins... It's that Kevin Spacey labeled himself as the wrong one
  6. Everyone who participates in pride month is going h**... Not because they Are gay but because pride is one of the 7 deadly sins
  7. Jesus died for our sins. *But he was only dead for 3 days* .
    So what did he sacrifice?
    *His weekend.*
    **Jesus gave up his weekend for our sins**
  8. I'm always confused by gay pride parades. Don't the g**... realize its a sin? One of the seven deadly ones, even!

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Deadly Sins One Liners

Which deadly sins one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with deadly sins? I can suggest the ones about sins and three sins.

  1. Which of the7 deadly sins are lions guilty of? Pride!!
  2. What is bread's most deadly sin? Gluteny
  3. Which deadly sin do bread lovers commit? Gluten-ny
  4. The seven deadly sins were having a Mexican stand-off... Greed-o shot first

Deadly Sins Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about deadly sins you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean sins of nuns jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make deadly sins pranks.

In a confession booth...

ME: I committed all seven deadly sins in 30 minutes.
PRIEST: Wow I gotta hear this.
ME: I was angry and envious at my neighbor so I lazily seduced his wife and ate all his groceries and I didn't share.
PRIEST: You forgot pride.
ME: No, Im pretty proud of this.

One morning, a priest gives a sermon on the Seven Deadly Sins

After the sermon, a guy goes up to the priest and says, "Father, thank you so much for giving that sermon. It meant so much to me, and I'll tell you why. I lost my hat last week and I couldn't find it anywhere. I finally decided to steal a new one from the store, but now that I heard your sermon, I'm not going to."
The priest smiles and says, "That's good, my son. The part about 'thou shalt not steal' moved you, did it?"
The guy says, "Nope. After that part about adultery, I remember where I left my hat."

An elderly woman had just returned

to her home from an evening worship service and was startled to find an intruder in her house.
Catching the man in the act of burglarizing her home, she yelled:
STOP! Acts 2:38! ( Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ so that your sins may be forgiven. )
As the burglar stopped dead in his tracks, the woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done.
Shortly, several officers arrived and took the man into custody.
As he was placing the handcuffs on the burglar, one of the officers asked:
Why did you just stand there? All the lady did was mention a scripture verse.
Scripture? replied the burglar. She said she had an axe and two 38's!