Data Jokes

Following is our collection of binary puns and gigabytes one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Data jokes for adults, dirty unauthorized jokes and clean hdd dad gags for kids.

The Best Data Puns

My stats professor told me that the larger the sample size the more trustworthy the data.

I guess the N's justify the means.

What is the difference between USA and USB?

One connects to all of your devices and accesses the data, the other is a hardware standard.

The misuse of users' Facebook data has caused Mark Zuckerberg significant emotional distress.

He asks that you respect his privacy during this challenging time.

Yo mama's so fat...

...she has to upgrade her data plan every time she sends a selfie.

There's two types of people

Those that can deduce facts from incomplete data


There are 2 types of people in this world

Those with the ability to extrapolate information from incomplete data

There are two kinds of people in the world

There are two kinds of people in the world. There are those who can extrapolate from incomplete data,

What would Mark Zuckerberg add to the game, if he created MineCraft?

Data.

So he can mine it.

What does baby computer call his father?

Data.

Why doesn't Captain Picard have an iPhone

He already has an android, and it came with a data plan.

I like my women like I like my computer data,

with the ability to back it up.


What did the data say to the CPU?

Cache me outside

A data analyst walks into a bar and sees two tables..

So he goes over to them and says; "Hey guys, can I join you?"

I was playing grand theft auto 5 when all of a sudden it crashes and an error message pops up

It read unfortunately the game is corrupted and the data will be deleted feeling sad and annoying with my 100s of hours lost I looked up online as to why it happened. I found a guide that said if you restart the game on the same console and go to the nearest garage and talk to the guy who's working on the car it can fix it. I did just that and it restored my old saves!
Thank god for that game mechanic

Who is the first person to have downloaded data from the cloud and onto their tablet?

Moses.

I hate it when people use the average of several data points to represent their data.

It's just mean.

What is the difference betweeen the USA and a USB

One records and reads all of your personal data, and the other is a hardware standard.

Statistical inference joke - why are two medians in a single data set funny?

Because it's a co-median ^_^

I checked my phone bill after my trip to Italy, and it said I spent DCXII dollars.

I must have left on Data Roman.


What Did The Hard Drive Get When It Wanted Data But Didn't Have The Resources?

A Cache-Advance

I went to the doctor today for a checkup and he showed me on a chart that I'm 20 pounds overweight.

But, I pointed out that using his very same data, *I'm not overweight.* I just need to be 3 inches taller.

I collected a lot of data trying to disprove observation bias.

The results were exactly what I expected.

One class D personnel from SCP foundation walks into a bar.

\[DATA EXPUNGED\]

There are 2 types of people...

1. Those who are able to make inferences from incomplete data.

I couldn't figure out why my data wasn't coming out like my classmate's, until I realized I dropped a square root in the formula.

I put it back in and re-plotted the data. I saw a radical change.

Where did the Wifi router go?

He went data way.

Which way did the programmer go?

He went data way.

What do you call an Asian woman who lives next to a data centre?

Ping Lo.

Being a prostitute on the Enterprise sounded interesting...

But actually it's mostly Data entry.

The most embarrassing thing that can happen to a data scientist...

Is premature extrapolation.

Don't have enough storage?

Buy a chinese phone, so you are ensured that CCP has backup of all your data.

There are two kinds of people in the world...

those who are unable to extrapolate from data.

Does anyone know why tik tok data is getting stolen?

I thought they would be looking for intelligence.....

Claims that cloud storage is the future of smartphone memory issues

Sounds good, but I have no data to back it up.

A database professional walks into a bar

And joins two tables.

There are 2 kinds of people

1. Those that can extrapolate from incomplete data

Which food collects your personal data?

A Zuckerburger.

A friend of mine accidentally deleted my game data and told me to calm down

...So after a nice cup of tea, i hid his body

A biologist, a physicist and a mathematician sit at a bench in a park

They see a man walk into a shed. 10 minutes later, two people walk out.

The biologist says "It was reproduction",
the physicist says "It must be bad data",
but the mathematician doesn't say anything.

A few minutes later, someone else walks in the shed.

The mathematician goes "Ok, *now* nobody is in the shed"

What's a pirate's favorite device to store data on ?

CD-RUM

Why couldn't the restaurant owners open a new data center

They just didn't have enough servers...

Find out if Cambridge Analytica has access to your data...

But first, fill out this personality & psychological profile quiz to find out...

what does a baby computer call its parents?

data & motherboard.

What's a ghost's favorite data type?

BOO-lean!

I recently told my girlfriend about removing the cookies and site data because it slows down the browser speed...

Now she understands why I delete the browsing history everyday.

BLONDES BLOW IT

Q: What's it called when a blonde blows in another blonde's ear?

A: Data transfer.

There are two kinds of people in the world

1) Those who can extrapolate from missing data.

If I had a pound for every email I got about data protection...

I'd have...

Well that's private

Three men walk in to a bar. One of them is wearing a hat

Oops!

Your current data plan doesnt cover this feature. Click here to upgrade.

Your options when you want to backup your data...

If you want to backup your data, you've got only 2 options. NAS or NSA.

Turns out google is selling your personal data

Bing if true.

What does a baby computer call it's dad?

DATA!

How many SCPs does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

[DATA EXPUNGED]

There is an abundance of input jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 53 funniest jokes and data puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any folder witze you can hear about data.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes