darth Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious darth puns

Met a prostitute who said she'll do anything for $50...

Guess who just got Darth Vader unlocked...

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How does Darth Vader manage to eat through that mask?

He's force fed.

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Why is Darth Vader so famous?

He was the first black man to admit he is the father.

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The last joke my brother made up, before he passed away this week.

Him: "If my name was Ella, and I married Darth Vader. My name would be Elevator". Stupid and corny, but it's exactly the kind of lame jokes he would make.

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How did Darth Vader know what Obi-Wan Kenobi was getting for Christmas?

He felt his presents…

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How do you know that Darth Vader isn't a black man underneath the mask?

He claims to be your father.

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How did Darth Vader figure out what Luke was getting for Christmas?

He felt his presents.

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Where do Siths do their shopping?

At the Darth Mall

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My friends 10 yo daughter made this up while in the elevator today: "Did you know Darth Vader has another daughter?"

Mom: "No, who?"
Daughter: "Ella, Ella Vader."

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Which sith lord prefers to cripple his opponents rather than kill them?

Darth Ritis

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What's Darth Vader's corrupt brother's name?

Taxi Vader

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Darth Vader could never find love....

He was looking in Alderaan places.

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Retailers have pulled all the Darth Vader toys from their shelves...

Apparently they are a choking hazard.

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Why did Darth Maul jack off into a piece of fruit?

Because the sith always comes in pears

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Seasonal Star Wars joke

> **Darth Vader**: Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas.

> **Luke**: How?

> **Darth Vader**: I felt your presents.

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How does Darth Vader know what he's getting for Christmas?

He feels his presents

(This is my only Christmas joke and I am deeply ashamed of that)

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Darth Vader was the first black guy to.....

admit that he's the father

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How did Luke Skywalker know what Darth Vader got him for his Birthday?

He felt his presents.

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Joke For Darth

What is the difference between the first fight between Vader and Kenobi and the second?

Obi-wan then Obi lost.

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How do we know for sure that Darth Vader isn't black?

Because he keeps on saying "I am your father"

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why was darth vader arrested?

excessive use of force.

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Had a dream that I was playing as Darth Vader in Battlefront 2

Woke up and couldn't find my wallet.

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What do you call a person whose wife was the Queen, daughter is a Princess and his boss is the Emperor, but he himself is no royal?

Darth Vader.

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Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker are having a lightsaber battle

Darth Vader says to Luke " I know what your getting for Christmas"
Luke says "eh?"
Darth Vader says again to Luke " I know what your getting for Christmas"
Luke says " how would you know that?"
Darth Vader says " I felt your presents"

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What's Darth Vader's least favorite temperature?

Luke warm.

^^im ^^sorry

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How did Darth Vader know what Luke had for Christmas?

He felt his presents.

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How did Luke always know what Darth was getting him for Christmas?

He felt his presents...

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You are Darth Vader. How can you tell if your stormtroopers just played paintball in their freetime again?

You can't.

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Just met Darth Vader's corrupt brother.

Taxi Vader

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Help me figure out a knock knock joke that's had me stumped for 20 years

When I was a kid my sisters and I ordered a book of knock knock jokes from the book club at school. I remember reading them to everyone who came by the house but there was one that I never understood. No one in my life has ever had a logical explanation for it and I have never forgotten it:

Knock Knock.

Who's there? Darth Vader.

Darth Vader who?

Darth Vader Cookie Crumble.

__

WTF?

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Darth Vader is fighting Luke Skywalker...

Darth Vader says to Luke: "Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas."
Luke: "How could you possibly know?"
Vader: "I felt your presents."

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Why did Darth Vader get suspended from the Police?

He was under investigation for excessive use of Force

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So Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader are locked in their final showdown...

...light sabers are flashing, the balance is delicate, but suddenly Luke knocks Darth's weapon away. As it's skidding out of reach, Luke moves in for the final blow. Quickly, Darth holds up a hand and says "Luke, wait! I need to tell you something". Luke, sensing a trap, asks why he should do such a thing. Darth replies, "Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas." Slightly taken aback, Luke asks "How do you know that?". Darth replies "Luke, I felt your presents."

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Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker are on an epic fight...

Suddenly, Vader stops swinging. He pulls Luke close to him, and says:

*breathing sounds*

"I know what you are getting for Christmas"

"WHAT?? IT CAN'T BE! HOW?"

*breathing sounds*

"Because I have felt your presents"

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What's the difference between Darth Vader and Tom Brady?

Darth Vader probably gets high fived

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What are the most funny Darth jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Darth? Well, here are the best Darth dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Darth pick up lines to share with friends.

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