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Dark Skin Jokes

23 dark skin jokes and hilarious dark skin puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about dark skin that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Dark Skin Short Jokes

Short dark skin jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The dark skin humour may include short brown skin jokes also.

  1. A dark skinned lady named Betty goes to the butcher and asks for some beef. The butcher replies: "Nooooo Black Betty, ham or lamb!"
  2. Dark I took my grandma to a fish spa center where the little fish eat your dead skin for only $45. 
     
    It was way cheaper than having her buried in the cemetery.
  3. Why are there so few dark skinned students at Hogwarts? Because most of them were expelled for using Black magic.
  4. How does a dark-skinned boy have light-skinned hands? ...because paint!
    -my four-year-old daughter.
  5. A dark skinned lady named Betty goes to the butcher and asks for some beef The butcher starts insulting her and spreads rumors around
  6. A dark-skinned human and a red-skinned human walk into a bar... It ends with the city guards being acquitted.
  7. Why aren't there many good, white people jokes? Because when they start getting dark, most of them get skin cancer and die.

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Dark Skin One Liners

Which dark skin one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with dark skin? I can suggest the ones about light skin and light skinned.

  1. I like dark mode on everything Except for my skin
  2. There's a mexican and a dark skin guy, Whos driving? The cop

Howlingly Hilarious Dark Skin Jokes for an Unforgettable Evening

What funny jokes about dark skin you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean bad skin jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make dark skin pranks.

Mom, why am I dark if my father's skin is alabaster and yours is too?

Rough translation from Spanish:
Child:Mom, why am I dark if my father's skin is alabaster and yours is too?
Mother: With how drunk I was that night it's a miracle you don't bark!

Today my wife gave birth to our son and unfortunately he was born with a very rare skin condition.

My wife told me it is called a pre-natal sun burn . Apparently it can be caused by too much time in tanning beds or long exposure to the sun on the beach.
Essentially all it does is dye the pigments of the child's skin dark brown but he shouldn't feel any pain.
She told me that there's no cure for it at this time and that he will likely suffer from it for the rest of his life.
Please keep my son Tyrone in your prayers.

A new discovery is made pertaining to the ethnicity of Ancient Egyptian Kings

Archaeologists have discovered that the kings of Ancient Egypt were in fact black. Upon unwrapping the gold sarcophagus they found the body of a dark chocolate skinned man. The legendary Pharaoh Rocher.

Scary Story

It seemed like an average Tuesday night. The roads were quiet outside, and rain was beginning to pour down hard. Things were going pretty slowly until a friend of mine burst through the door, but there was something off about him. There he stood, motionless in the dark, his piercing stare not leaving me. After a moment or two, he began to slowly peel his own skin off. Blood dripped slowly from his lips, and I had to ask him with the most courage I could muster:

"Dude, do you need to borrow some ChapStick?"

A husbands last request

A husband and wife have four sons. The oldest three are tall with red hair and light skin while the youngest son is short with brown hair and dark eyes.
The father was on his deathbed when he turned to his wife and said, "Honey, before I die, be totally honest with me: Is our youngest son my child?"
The wife replied, "I swear on everything that's holy that he is your son."
With that, the husband passed away. The wife muttered, "Thank God he didn't ask about the other three."

A story about my first time

The sky was dark
The moon was high
All alone just she and I.
Her hair was soft
Her eyes were blue
I knew just what she wanted to do.
Her skin so soft
Her legs so fine
I ran my fingers down her spine.
I didn't know how
But I tried my best
I started by placing my hands on her breast.
I remember my fear my fast beating heart
But slowly she spread her legs apart
And when I did it I felt no shame.
All at once the white stuff came
At last it's finished it's all over now
My first time ever at milking a cow...

Jesus is always watching.

A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said, 'Jesus knows you're here.'
He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head and continued.
Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard 'Jesus is watching you.'
Startled, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.
'Did you say that?' he hissed at the parrot.
'Yes', the parrot confessed, then squawked, 'I'm just trying to warn you that he's watching you.'
The burglar relaxed. 'Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?'
'Moses,' replied the bird.
'Moses?' the burglar laughed. 'What kind of people would name a bird Moses?'
'The kind of people who would name a Rottweiler Jesus.'

A Burglar Broke Into a House...

A burglar broke into a house one night. He shone his flashlight around, looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said, 'Jesus knows you're here.'
He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight Off, and froze.
When he heard nothing more, after a bit, he shook his head and continued.
Just as he pulled the stereo out so He could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard 'Jesus is watching you.'
Freaked out, he shone his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice.
Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.
'Did you say that?' he hissed at the parrot.
'Yep', the parrot confessed, then squawked, 'I'm just trying to warn you that he is watching you.'
The burglar relaxed.. 'Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you ?'
'Moses,' replied the bird.
'Moses?' the burglar laughed. 'What kind of people would name a bird Moses?'
'The kind of people that would name a Rottweiler Jesus.'

Jesus is watching you

A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said, 'Jesus knows you're here.'
He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, after a bit, he shook his head and continued. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard a voice....say, 'Jesus is watching you.'
Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. 'Did you say that?' he hissed at the parrot.
'Yep', the parrot confessed, then squawked, 'I'm just trying to warn you that he is watching you.' The burglar relaxed. 'Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?'
'I'm Moses.' replied the bird.
'Moses?' the burglar laughed. 'What kind of people would name a bird Moses?'
'The same kind of people that would name their Rottweiler Jesus.'

Jesus is watching

A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said, 'Jesus knows you're here.'
He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head and continued.
Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard 'Jesus is watching you.'
Startled, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in
the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.
'Did you say that?' he hissed at the parrot.
'Yes', the parrot confessed, then squawked, 'I'm just trying to warn you that he's watching you.'
The burglar relaxed. 'Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?'
'Moses,' replied the bird.
'Moses?' the burglar laughed. 'What kind of people would name a bird Moses?'
'The kind of people who would name a Rottweiler Jesus.'

In an African tribe village, the chieftain's wife gave birth to a white skinned child.

The chieftain quickly figured the voluntary doctor from Europe might be to blame. So the chieftain asked him to talk in his tent.
Chieftain: "Today my wife gave birth to a white child. She and I are dark skinned. You are white. It doesn't take a doctor to figure out that you have slept with my wife!"
The doctor remains calm: "The answer lies in the genetics. Some genetics have recessive traits, which are not apparent to the parents but may be passed on to the child. For example, last week one of your sheep gave birth to a black sheep."
The chieftain pauses for a thinking, then replies: "I tell you what. You say no word about black sheep and I say no word about white child."

A husband and wife have four boys. The odd part of it is that the older three have red hair, light skin, and are tall, while the youngest son has black hair, dark eyes, and is short.
The father eventually takes ill and is lying on his deathbed when he turns to his wife and says, "Honey, before I die, be completely honest with me. Is our youngest son my child?"
The wife replies, "I swear on everything that's holy that he is your son." With that, the husband passes away. The wife then mutters, "Thank God he didn't ask about the other three."