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Dark Matter Jokes

41 dark matter jokes and hilarious dark matter puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about dark matter that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Dark Matter Short Jokes

Short dark matter jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The dark matter humour may include short dark people jokes also.

  1. What's the difference between dark matter and Black Lives Matter? Dark matter has the capacity to leave an impact on a system
  2. How many WoW devs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Doesn't matter. They'll just nerf darkness next patch instead.
  3. I like my coffee like I like my women, It doesn't matter how dark as long as it's sweet :3
  4. What does Neil Degrasse Tyson say to pickup a lady? "Hey, would you like to get astro physical with my dark matter?"
  5. Along with "Antimatter" and "Dark Matter" we've recently discovered the existence of... "Doesn't Matter" witch appears to have no affect on the universe at all.
  6. Light... Two physicists are in a dark room. The first physicist suggests they turn on a light. The second physicist says "does light really matter?" The first one replies "no, it waves".
  7. how many black live matters protester does it take to screw in a light bulb? no one knows it was too dark to see them.
  8. I tried to discuss multidimensional physics with a friend today But he didn't want to talk about such dark matter.
  9. Apparently, scientists proved the existence of dark matter Does that mean
    Black Matter Lives?
  10. I am deeply troubled that more than half the universe cannot be detected... This truly is a dark matter

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Dark Matter One Liners

Which dark matter one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with dark matter? I can suggest the ones about dark side and darkness.

  1. Love holds the universe together. Just kidding. It's dark matter.
  2. My love life is like dark matter.... It theoretically exists.
  3. What do you call a light fragment? A dark matter
  4. Where can we study dark matter? Just visit Africa
  5. Dark matter? No Everyone matters!
  6. Einstein Vs Weinstein. Both are responsible for dark matter.
  7. First video of DARK MATTER
  8. People keep on talking about galaxies and space... When it's a really dark matter
  9. A few kids were talking... Darkness Matters...
  10. Thanksgiving dinner table comment of the day... Mom: "Dark Meat Matters"
  11. Why can't Neil deGrasse Tyson find his father? Because dark matter is difficult to detect
  12. Why don't Dark Matter particles have s**... tapes? Because no one sees them coming.
  13. DId you hear about the Dark Matter particle's s**... tape? No one saw it coming.

Cheerful Fun Dark Matter Jokes for Lovely Laughter

What funny jokes about dark matter you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean dark shadows jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make dark matter pranks.

Scientists have today discovered that dark matter actually does not exist.

The source of the unknown mass in the galaxy was never dark matter, but the result of a calculation mistake.
The scientists admit that they forgot to include your mother in the calculations, and therefor the last (approximately) 80% of the mass in the Milky Way has finally been discovered.

A football coach addresses his team amidst rumors of his racism...

and says:
"I know people have been saying things, but those rumors couldn't be farther from the truth. The truth is, I don't care what color any of you are. I don't care if you're black. I don't care if you're white. It simply doesn't matter. So, I'll tell you what. From now on, you're all green.
"Now, everybody get on the bus. Light green in front, dark green in back."

Along with antimatter and dark matter, a new type of matter was discovered

Called doesn't matter, which has absolutely no affect on the universe whatsoever

What's the difference between dark matter and f**... matter?

None! It's dark, it's invisible, it's everywhere (85%)

The other day someone asked me "what was the matter?"

I simply replied "dark"
God this an awful joke

Probably one for British people

A man and his wife were on their honeymoon and about to do the deed. The wife stops the husband unexpectedly.
"Darling," she says. "I am afraid I have a dark secret to tell you, and I haven't been entirely honest with you."
"Sweetheart, no matter what you have done in the past I will forgive you."
"Well," she starts. "I used to be a h**...."
"My dearest," he replies. "That is no problem for me. To be honest I'm a little turned on. Tell me more."
"Ok then, my name was Brian and I played for Wigan."