Danger Jokes

122 danger jokes and hilarious danger puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about danger that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

This article explores the various types of jokes that arise from the popular Nickelodeon show Henry Danger's Danger Force. Discover how these hilarious jokes can range from light-hearted banter to dark deadpan humor and the potential danger that can arise from carrying a joke too far. From joking about entering the Danger Zone to making jokes about carcasses and other potentially troubling topics, get tips on when it's important to know when to warn against a joke.

Quick Jump To

jokes about danger

Best Short Danger Jokes

Short danger puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The danger humour may include short threat jokes also.

  1. I tried to warn my son about the dangers of russian roulette... It went in one ear and out the other.
  2. I just got kicked out of karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" six times in a row… They said I exceeded my maximum number of Loggins attempts…
  3. Cigarette warnings should also include how dangerous it is just going to purchase a package... My dad left 19 years ago to buy some and he still hasn't made it back.
  4. Why did KGB officers always travel in threes? One who could read, one who could write, and the third to watch over those two dangerous intellectuals.
  5. Cigarettes are just like squirrels. They aren't dangerous until you stick one in your mouth and light it on fire.
  6. On my way home from work saw a man texting while driving.. Knowing how dangerous this can be I pulled up next to him, rolled down my window and threw my beer at him.
  7. A police officer was assigned to hunt a dangerous cannibal on his first day on the job All the more seasoned officers had already been eaten
  8. Im not going to vaccinate my kids because its too dangerous Id rather the doctors do it to ensure its done right
  9. Detroit is a such a dangerous city... You can't even let your kids out at night.
    The might rob someone.
  10. Feminists are way more dangerous than someone with a gun At least a gun only has one trigger...
Danger joke, Feminists are way more dangerous than someone with a gun

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about danger can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of danger puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Share Jokes With Friends

Danger One Liners

Which danger one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with danger? I can suggest the ones about risk and angered.

  1. I still 100% stand behind Alec Baldwin.. Standing in front of him is too dangerous.
  2. What is long, black and dangerous to cut into? the line at KFC
  3. What is the most dangerous type of canoes? Volcanoes
  4. What is the most dangerous position in chess? C4
  5. Women's hockey is the most dangerous sport... Twelve women, three periods each.
  6. I like my pick-up lines how I like my cheetos Dangerously Cheesy
  7. I've heard rumors acid is dangerous. Pretty sure they are baseless though.
  8. What is the most dangerous part of a church? The pews.
  9. I'll tell you what's a dangerous insect... ....That Hepatitis Bee
  10. I survived the most dangerous place in America... And all I got was this lousy diploma
  11. Worst thing to read in Braille DANGER. DO NOT TOUCH!
  12. Would it be dangerous for a human to live 65 million years ago? You bet jurassic would.
  13. Don't join dangerous cults Practice safe sects
  14. What's the most dangerous, predominantly black area known to man? Space
  15. How do you avoid stds while in a dangerous cult? By making sure to practice safe sects

Danger Zone Jokes

Here is a list of funny danger zone jokes and even better danger zone puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I was booed off stage and locked out of a karaoke bar for singing Danger Zone too many times very poorly They told me I had too many unsuccessful Loggins attempts
  • Why do scottish people sing 'Danger Zone' when they forget their password? Because they Kenny Loggin.
  • I got kicked out of the karaoke bar for singing "Danger Zone" too many times They lock you out after 5 Loggins attempts.
  • I got kicked out of the Karaoke bar last night for singing Danger Zone, then Footloose, then I'm Alright ... ...too many attempted Logging's...
  • Did you hear that the guy that wrote Danger Zone had his identity stolen online? They got all his Kenny logins
  • What does the singer of Danger Zone and other hits call his usernames and passwords? Kenny Log-ins.
  • What function puts you in the danger zone The LOG^^^gins function!
  • You better call Kenny Loggins CAUSE YOU'RE IN THE DANGER ZONE!

Stranger Danger Jokes

Here is a list of funny stranger danger jokes and even better stranger danger puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Jesus had a twin that was abducted shortly after birth In other words, there was doppelganger stranger danger in the manger.
Danger joke, Jesus had a twin that was abducted shortly after birth

Witty Danger Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun with Friends

What funny jokes about danger you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean damage jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make danger prank.

A lion walks into a bar...

Several people get up and leave predicting the impending danger.

So a rhino walks into a bar...

and several patrons pay their tabs and leave because they see the danger in this situation.

A horse walks into a bar

A horse walks into a bar. The other customers promptly get up and leave, seeing the potential danger in the situation

What's the most dangerous place in an Excel file?


What is the biggest danger to an ear f*cker?

Hearing AIDS.

The Philandering Duck

This swinging philandering duck suddenly became conscious of the danger of acquiring AIDS through s**... promiscuity.
To put himself at ease he went to his local druggist and asked for a c**.... "How much will that be?" asked the duck. "1 dollar and 19 cents" replied the druggist. "Would you like me to put this on your bill"? "What kind of a duck to you think I am"? replied the duck.

A wife is at home watching the news.

On the TV she sees footage of a crazy man driving the wrong way on the freeway. She realizes her husband takes the same path home from work. She immediately calls him and warns him of the danger. She says, "Be careful! There's a crazy man driving on the wrong side of the freeway!"
The husband replies, "One!? There's hundreds of them!"

What is more dangerous than a polar bear?

A bi-polar bear.

Danger is my middle name.

Avoid is my first, and Completely is my last. Nice to meet you.


Around 0AD childbirth was fraught with danger, but luckily for Jesus he was born in a stable condition

An US tourist visiting the USSR fell down the open manhole...

After he was helped out, he started complaining: why on earth such as danger was not marked properly? In the USA there would be red lanterns or at least some red flags. "How did you arrive in Moscow?" asked one of the Russians who helped him out. "Well, via Sheremetyevo airport". "Haven't you noticed the huge red flag on its main building?"

What is the most dangerous state of water?

Ice is.
I'll show myself out now.

What's the most dangerous animal in the world?

A Bluebird with a Tommy Gun.

Ever since I read an article about the danger of smoking

I stopped reading.

What's the world's most dangerous city?


I really need to work on my accent marks

Or else my French grades may be in grave danger.

If Danger Dolan started making fun of people, would he be known as

Danger Trollan

What's the most dangerous place in Washington D.C.?

Between a politician and a news camera.

Why is dangerous to have s**... in canada

eh'ds everywhere

Which is the most dangerous page of the newspaper?


Have you heard the one about the suicidal farmer that liked to mutilate cows?

He was a danger to himself and udders.

The most dangerous rollercoaster in the world is the Wolfcoaster

The dangerous part isn't the velocity. It's the wolves.

Literary alcohol puns

I saw someone post some the other day. Has anyone thought of any new ones?
Here are a couple my friends and I thought of...
50 Shades of Grey Goose,
Into the Wild Turkey,
Beer and Present Danger,
Patriot Drinking Games,
The Sum of All Beers (I like Tom Clancy),
The Red Badge of Liquid Courage.

A gorilla walks into a bar...

And several people get up to leave seeing the possible danger of the situation.

What's the most dangerous thing in your freezer?

Ice is.

Why did the gravedigger quit his job at the haunted cementery?

He was in GRAVE danger.

Yo mama so fat

It is a serious problem. She is suffering from diabetes, and your father dosen't find her attractive anymore, putting their marrige in danger

What's the most dangerous part about Scrabble

It's all fun and games until someone loses an I

Girls are like roads.

more curves equals more danger.

Policeman stops priest on the bike...

Policeman: Hello father. Your light isn't working. That will be 20$.
Priest: Don't worry mister, i'm not in danger. Jesus is always with me.
Policeman: Sorry father. Then the fine is 40$ because two persons are not allowed to ride a bike.

Chicago's a dangerous place.

Last time I visited I stole two cars and a lady's purse.

What's more dangerous than a serial killer?

A parallel killer.

What is the most dangerous color?


What's the most dangerous tree in the world?


A horse walks into a bar...

People begin to quickly, but calmly leave the bar as they realize the potential danger of the situation.

What's more dangerous than running with the scissors?

s**... with the runs

What's the most dangerous thing about Steven Seagal?

his Cholesterol level

A dangerous parasite walks into a bar...

The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind in here."
The parasite replies, "Well, you're not a very good **host**."

I'm about to have a dangerous cup of coffee... tea first, though.

Why is it dangerous to drive near churches?

Because there is so much cross traffic.

What's the most dangerous thing in the corporate ocean?

The Loan Shark

What is more dangerous than a pitbull with AIDS ?

The guy who transmitted it to him.

A horse walks into a bar.

Many people get up and leave seeing the potential danger in this situation.

A drunk is leaving a bar and heads to his car...

A police officer notices the drunk fumbling with the keys and knowing the iminent danger, says to the man, "where do you think you're going like this? You can barely walk!" The man then replies, "I know, that's why I'm driving!"

Where is the most dangerous place to swim?

Hepatitis C.

What is the most dangerous spectrum of light?


Boston's dead crows

On interstate I-95 running from Boston to New Hampshire they had a problem with crows being hit by vehicles. They were being killed by the hundreds. They hired a professor from MIT to figure out why so many crows were being hit. He discovered that when crows land to feed, they leave one crow in the tree to watch for danger. They found out that the Boston crows could say caw caw but they couldn't say truck truck .

How do you assess the danger of a chemical?


Women can be likened to roads

The more curves, the bigger the danger

It's actually really dangerous to steal kitchen utensils from bakeries.

But you just have to be willing to take the whisk

The most dangerous thing about the World Cup being held in Russia

is ensuring the Kremlin doesn't eat after midnight

Why is it dangerous to have more than one violin in your house?

Because it leads to domestic violins.
(From my 9 year old...)

What's the most dangerous Caribbean food?

Ricin peas.

My friend got fired from his cow milking job because of his erratic behavior.

He was considered to be a danger to himself and udders.

A serial killer who was known for taking body parts as trophies

A serial killer who was known for taking body parts as trophies was captured after attacking a uniformed police officer and severing her arm. When asked why he went after the officer despite knowing the danger, he simply replied, "It was a wrist I was willing to take."

It was really dangerous driving home from the pub yesterday...

Especially since I walked there.

Did you know that tornadoes can displace shellfish?

Apparently the locals in danger areas are able to identify oncoming bad weather due to the shellfish preceding it.
They call it the clam before the storm.

On a river rafting trip in Egypt, a couple began to sink. The husband urged his wife to swim to safety before the water got too deep, but she refused to believe she was in any danger.

She was too deep in de Nile.

Failing surgery on a grape would make it...

in a grape danger.

That's Dangerous!

I'm never jumping out of the 3rd floor window again...

I could've killed myself!

Why is it dangerous to do math in the jungle?

Because if you add 4 plus 4, you get ate

I told my therapist that my marriage was in danger because I wouldn't stop doing a Borat impression

He asked me who led me to believe this ...

What do you call a dog who warns you about danger at the yogurt drink factory?

Mango Lassi

Have you heard the undead are attacking people?

Yeah we're in grave danger

God's assistant: why did you give man two eyes?

God: So he can know how far or close danger is
God's assistant: why two ears?
God: So he can know if danger is on the left or right
God's assistant: then why only one nose? Surely it won't help identify location of danger.
God: Yes but wouldn't it be funny when he won't know who f**... in the room.

Why is it dangerous to listen to too much Queen?

Because of its high Mercury content.

Little Peter

Came in to class one day with burns all over his face.
The teacher asked him what happend.
"Well i bought a crate of fireworks and..."
"There you have it kids, fireworks are a real danger" the teacher interupted
"Thats exactly what my father said as he threw it into the fireplace"

You've been warned

A stranger enters a store and spots a sign: DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG! Inside, he sees a harmless old hound asleep on the floor.
"Is that the dog we're supposed to be aware of?" he asks the owner.
"That's him," comes the reply.
"He doesn't look at all dangerous to me. Why would you post that sign?"
"Before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him."

What is the most dangerous bug at the moment?

The asymptoma tick

A farmer was fed up with drivers speeding down the road where he lived, so he asked the police to put up a sign...

They put up a "Slow down, speed limit" sign - with no effect. Then, "Danger, road hazard!" sign was put up, but had no effect, either. Then the police tried a sign stating "Children crossing" - and still nobody slowed down.
Finally, the farmer asked the police if he could put up his own sign. They agreed, and to their surprise, just days later a passing officer saw a row of cars moving very slowly past the farmer's place. The policeman approached the farm, and saw a new, hand-painted sign stating: "Nudist Colony".

It's going to be dangerous to trick-or-treat this Halloween due to the coronavirus pandemic.

The only way you're getting candy from a stranger this year is by putting on a mask and going to the grocery store.

In a dangerous situation, I'd always put my children first.

I do this because I have a crippling habit of hiding behind my mistakes.

Danger joke, In a dangerous situation, I'd always put my children first.

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these danger jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.