custer Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious custer puns

What did Assad and Custer say?

"Where the fuck did all these Tomahawks come from"?


Remembering General Custer

In remembrance of the Battle of Little Bighorn, the government hires an artist to create a mural. He's told by the generals "paint what was going through his mind in the final moments of the battle."

He goes to work, and a few weeks later, he unveils his creation. On the mural, there's a picture of Jesus on the cross and a bunch of Indians all having sex.

One of the generals asks, "What in the hell were you thinking when you made this?" The artist explains, "I was just doing what you told me."
The general inquires, "How is this close to what I told you?" The artist replies "Well, wouldn't you think his last thoughts would be 'Jesus Christ! Look at all the fucking Indians!"


Ten times in history the "f" word was appropriate...

- "Scattered fucking showers, my ass" - Noah, 4314 BC

- "How the fuck did you work that out?" - Pythagoras, 126 BC

- "You want WHAT on the fucking ceiling?" - Michelangelo, 1566

- "Where did all those fucking Indians come from?" - Custer, 1877

- "It does so fucking look like her" - Picasso, 1926

- "Where the fuck are we?" - Amelia Earhart, 1937

- "Any fucking idiot could understand that" - Einstein, 1938

- "What the fuck was that?" - Mayor of Hiroshima, 1945

- "I need this parade like I need a fucking hole in the head!" - JFK, 1963

- "Aw c'mon... who the fuck is going to find out?" - Bill Clinton, 1997


What's the difference between Jack Daniel's and General Custer?

Jack Daniel's is still killing indians.


What did general Custer and Assad both say to their men?



Little Billy was in class, learning about Custard's last stand...

The teacher asked all the kids to draw a picture of what they thought was going through the mind of General Custer. Little Billy drew a cow witha halo over it's head and a bunch of Indians having sex. "Um... Billy, what is this?" The teacher asked. Little Billy responded, "It's what General Custer was thinking, Ms. Johnson... 'Holy cow, look at all the fucking Indians. "


General Custer is addressing his men at the Little Bighorn. He says "well boys, I've got some good news and some bad news."

"The bad news is that the Sioux are camped right down the hill. Come morning they're going to overrun us. They'll ride roughshod over our whole company and leave us all killed, then probably mutilate our corpses beyond recognition when they're done."

His lieutenant asks, "what's the good news General?"

Custer says "Well, we won't have to ride through Nebraska again."


What's the difference between Colonel Custer and Jack Daniels?

Jack Daniels is still killing Indians


Whats the diffrence between General Custer and Jack Daniel's?

Jack Daniel's is still killing indians.


What did Custer say to his troops 140 years ago today?



Who's killed more natives than General Custer?

Jack Daniels


what is the difference between captain Morgan and general Custer?

Captain Morgan is still killing Indians to this day


General Custer to a Geordie soldier: "The Apaches are playing war drums!" Geordie soldier: "So they're thieving bastards as well as savages!"


When the US Army couldn't Pass Muster

the Indians Cut Custer


What are the most funny Custer jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Custer? Well, here are the best Custer dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Custer pick up lines to share with friends.


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