The Best 71 Currency Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Currency jokes. There are some currency gdp jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these currency crypt puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Currency Jokes and Puns
A boy asked his Bitcoin-investing dad...
...for $10.00 worth of Bitcoin currency.
Dad: $9.67? What do you need $10.32 for?
What's a dog's least favorite currency?
the pound
fluctuations
This asian lady goes to a bank to exchange her currency into dollars. For 1000 yuans she gets about 160$.
A week later she walks in with a thousand more and this time she only gets 150.
Confused, she asks the teller " Why 10$ less this time?"
Teller says "fluctuations"
She turns to leave and says " Fluc you americans too..."
Currency caper
A Japanese man visits Australia.
On the way in he converts his 4000 yen to $100.
A couple of weeks later, he is returning home and converts his last $100, but this time only receives 2000 yen.
"what's up with this?", he enquires, "why is the conversion rate half what it was when I came here?"
"fluctuations." replies the exchange kiosk operator.
"yeah? well fluck you too, white man."
Why did the Irish call their currency the "Punt" ?
Because it rhymes with Bank Manager
What do aliens use for currency?
Starbucks!
There's an Italian town where pasta is a currency
A penne for their thoughts.
What did the cashier say after handing down a wad of currency to Dracula?
"Count Dracula."
Our official currency should become bubblegum...
That way it can be inflated and deflated at will!
An Asian guy walks into
An Asian guy walks into the New York City currency exchange with 2000 yen and walks out with $72. Next week he walks in with 2000 yen and gets $66. He asks the lady why he gets less money this week than last week. The lady says "Fluctuations". The Asian guy storms out, and just before slamming the
door, turns around and says: "Fluc you Amelicans too!"
So I hear that the Euro is destabilizing and deflating...
...if its value decreases any more, Europe might have to switch back to their old international currency, Czechoslovakia.
You can explore currency usd reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean currency euro dad jokes. There are also currency puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
A Japanese man walks into a currency exchange
A Japanese man walks into a currency exchange with 4000 yen to exchange and receives $40.
A week later, he walks into the currency exchange again with 4000 yen, but this time only receives $30. He asks the teller why he received less money this time.
"Fluctuations," the teller says.
Furious, the Japanese man storms out of the exchange, but before slamming the door, turns around and shouts "Fluc you Amelicans too!"
With how fat America is....
With how fat America is, I'm surprised their currency isn't in pounds.
This Chinese chap goes into a bank to change some currency. After receiving his Money he asks, "How come I came in here with same amount of Money as yesterday but today I get less Yuans in return?"
The banker says, "Fluctuations."
The Chinese guy replies, "Fluck you Blitish too."
When/If Scotland becomes independent, what will the national currency be called?
Doesn't matter, you won't be able to pry it out of the cheap bastards' hands anyway.
A student asks another student, "How many zeroes does your salary have?"
He responds "One"
"In which currency?"
"Any :("
I'm excited about a black person being on the $20 bill.
I always wanted to use black people as currency.
Im excited to have Tubman on the twenty
So we can use black people as currency again
What does black people and Deutsche Mark have in common?
Both are outdated currency.
What's the best way for an American to lose weight?
Gamble in British currency.
Ever wonder why Britain's currency dropped so quick after the Brexit compared to everyone else's?
Because paper money weighs like a gram but Britain's is a pound.
A Japanese man walked into the currency exchange in New York City with 2000 yen and walked out with $72.
The following week, he walked in with another 2000 yen, and was handed $66.
He asked the teller why he got less money that week than the previous week.
The teller said, "Fluctuations."
The Japanese man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and shouted, "Fluc you Amelicans, too!"
I heard Venezuelan currency has inflated so much they are weighing it instead of counting it.
Looks like they finally transitioned from bolivars to pounds.
If I Had a [currency] For Every [action],
I would do more of [action].
So they say a Harriet Tubman's face is going on the $20 bill.
Excellent, I can't wait to start using black people as currency again.
George's son
George goes to the Birth Registration Office to register his newborn son.
The man behind the counter asks the name he wants to give to
the boy, and the father replies: "Euro."
The man says that such a name is not acceptable, because it's a currency.
Says George: "What? There weren't any objections when I called my first two sons Mark and Frank."
What type of currency do pickles use?
dill dough.
In fallout, why are caps used as currency?
Because america is a CAPitalist country.
What currency do they use in space?
Starbucks
What type of currency they use in outer space?
Star Bucks
Zimbabwe's currency is so devalued...
That rapper "50 cent" is known as "40 billion dollar"
A Japanese man walks into a currency exchange.
He gives the teller $100 CAD And receives $150 ¥ back.
He returns the following week to do the same thing. He gives the teller $100 CAD and receives $140 ¥.
He asks "I was in here last week, why am I not getting the same amount back?"
Teller replies, "Well, fluctuations."
The Japanese man says, "Oh yeah? Well fluck you white guys too"
If Europe uses Euros as currency...
then Africa should use Afros as currency.
Did you hear of the American who robbed a bank in Latvia?
Turns out potatoes aren't a valid currency in the US.
Exchange rate
I had a bunch of Canadian dollars I needed to exchange, so I went to
the currency exchange window at the local bank. Just one lady in front of me...an Asian lady who was trying to exchange yen for dollars and she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, 'Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla fo yen. Today I get hunat eighty? Why it change?' The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, 'Fluctuations'. The Asian lady says, 'Fluc you white people, too'.
I went to pay the Cashier at the Grocery store
Cashier "That will be $18.35"
Me: Hands her a $50 bill
Cashier "Sorry sir, We cant accept that because we had too many problems with counterfeit currency. Do you have anything smaller?"
Me " I fully understand, Here you go.."
*Politely hands her a crisp $25 bill*
What's the one currency superman can't hold?
Kryptocurrency.
TIL that the Hindi word for "penny" is derived from the word for bread, as in the ancient Indus valley, small and dense pieces of bread were used as currency
Sounds like a bunch of naan-cents to me
Germany and the Czech Republic have left the EU to form their own fully integrated economy.
Their currency is called the ✓
I think that we should officially change our currency to balloons.
You could much more easily control inflation.
What is the Zombie equivalent of a Leprechaun's Pot o' Gold?
Crypt o' Currency.
My grandfather was cheap. He'd give me a 50 dollar bill each year for my birthday
Not currency; an actual invoice for 50 dollars
The police arrested me for paying for sex with a child.
Apparently they aren't legal currency.
A boy asks his father, the Bit-coin investor,
...for some Bitcoin currency again, this time in the amount of $25.00.
Dad: $23.67? What do you need $20.32 for?
A Korean man walked into the currency exchange in New York City with 200,000 Korean won and walked out with $200...
The following week, he walked in with another 200,000 Korean won, and was handed $185. He asked the teller why he got less money that week than the previous week. The teller said , "Three syllables bro: Fluc-tu-ations." The Korean man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and shouted, "Fluc you Amelicans, too!"
Nerds buy Bitcoin currency because it reminds them of their girlfriend
Completely virtual.
A boy asked his bitcoin trading father
...for $10.00 worth of Bitcoin currency.
Dad: $9.45? What do you need $10.11 for?
Currency Fluctuations
An Asian man comes to the US to do business and converts 110 million Yen into 1 million dollars. On his next trip, he returns to the bank to do the same, but only receives $990,000 in return.
He asks the teller, "Why did I receive less this time?"
The teller responds with a shrug, "Fluctuations"
The man gets very angry and storms out, stopping at the door to shout back, "Fluc your Americans too!"
I want to make a joke about Ghanaian currency
... but I'm not sure anyone wants to Cedis.
I used to be a cashier at a gas station on the Canadian border.
I would always ask what currency people would be paying with, but I stopped after a woman screamed at me for assuming her tender.
Did you hear about the global trade war to determine who's currency is stronger?
South Korean Won.
An Iranian goes to exchange some currency
He asks the teller what the current rate is for the US Dollar.
"Now, or... now?"
What do you call it when you cut out the Presidents' pictures from your bills?
Defacing currency
Currency trading
I used to trade currency. this asian guy came in and wanted to exchange 10,000yen - I gave him $120.
a week later he came in with another 10,000yen - I gave him $105.
a week after that he came in with another 10,000yen - I gave him $135.
the guy said to me in an annoyed voice " why one week $120, then $105, then $135! - why the difference?!!?"
I says to him "fluctuations"
He responds "fluck you white people"
Why didn't George Washington want his portrait on US currency?
Because he didn't want to be drawn and "quartered."
What is a deers preffered currency?
Bucks
What is the accepted currency in Australia?
Outbucks.
Why is everyone in outer space a basic white girl?
Because the universal currency is Starbucks
I believe that it is time for all the world's countries to come together and create one universal currency
I mean it's just common cents
I had to throw out all of my danish currency
I didn't wanna catch the Kronervirus
What's the difference between British currency and American currency?
You can Pound me but you can't Dollar me.
Every single currency in this world is just an illusion, a social construct
but Brazil's real.
Which country has no official currency?
Chequeoslovakia
I have a job at the mint making paper currency.
That's right, my job isn't making cents.
Did anyone hear about that country who started using balloons as currency?
They ended up with a massive inflation problem.
A boy asked his bitcoin-investing dad for £10.00
The boy asked his Dad for £10.00 in bitcoin currency.
The das said "£9.57? What do you need £10.79 for?"
An Asian walks into a currency exchange and get $100 back for his exchange
Next day he goes there again and for the same amount of money he receives $94 this time.
He asks the teller "why $6 less today compared to yesterday"
The teller say "fluctuations"
The Asian man get up angrily and storms out slamming the door, turns around and shouts "fluc you Americans too!"
What kind of currency do astronauts use?
Starbucks
I sold my cabin out in the mountains to Sasquautch.
He paid me in cryptid currency.
What type of currency will Superman never accept?
Krypto-currency
Street gangs of southern LA have started decapitating each other and using the body parts to trade for goods...
The most valuable of which is the Crip toe currency.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the currency bonuses jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working currency coin piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.