Cue Jokes
30 cue jokes and hilarious cue puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cue that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Cue Short Jokes
Short cue jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The cue humour may include short pool jokes also.
- Ringwraiths My daughter watching Lord of the rings:
D: So the hobbits call the nazgul the black riders right?
Me: yeah
D: the nazgul are like: 'yo, that's wraithist'
Cue facepalm. - I hinted to my friend that if he wanted to improve his billiards game, he should get better equipment... ...sadly, he took my cue.
- My therapist told me that I'm terrible in picking up social cues. I think she's hitting on me.
- I was playing snooker with Jacqueline. I looked at her and said, "Where's your cue?"
She said, "It's after the C." - I'm bad at reading social cues, can't make eye contact, am really good at drawing, and don't pick up on sarcasm... I think I might be artistic.
- Did you hear about the guy who burnt down the Chinese restaurant? He was charged with won ton destruction
^^*cue* ^^*groan* - Trump mistakenly referred to 9/11 attacks as 7/11 attacks It seems someone has been providing him fake cues.
- Courtesy of my 6 year old. She: What's that under there?
Me: Under where?
*cue, kids doubled over with laughter*
You said underwear! - What's the difference between Eric Clapton and a snooker player? One plays with an electric guitar, the other a-cue-stick.
- The genius and the pool player A genius walks into a bar and says, "I have 200 IQ!"
The pool player replies, "I have an eye cue too!" and pokes the genius in the eye.
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Cue One Liners
Which cue one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with cue? I can suggest the ones about pong and queue.
- From my 7 y/o What do you call a bunch of hairdressers having a party?
A Barber-cue - Used one of the kids dolls to play snooker It's now a Barbie-cue
- What kind of a cue would Barbie use if she played pool? A barbeque.
- I was waiting for ages to play snooker the other night but gave up The cue was too long
- What does an onii-chan drive? A Niisan.
*cue rimshot* - What do bulls do math with? A cow-culator!
(Cue groans) - Why can't an autistic kid play billiards? He can't pick up cues.
- Why was the cotton swab really good at playing billiards? It had cue tips
- If Pokemon Go is forbidden in Cuba by popular opinion... Queued Cubans cue Cubone ban.
- Which part of a billiards setup can you use to clean your ears? The cue tip.
Cue Ball Jokes
Here is a list of funny cue ball jokes and even better cue ball puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do a cab driver and a cue ball have in common? The harder you hit them
...the more english you get out. - How are a Mexican and a cue ball alike? The more you hit them, the more English comes out.
Uproarious Cue Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What funny jokes about cue you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean laughter jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make cue pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An old couple gets pulled over and...
Lady cop - "May I see you license and registration sir?"
Old man - "ugh, what did she say?"
Old wife - "She needs to see you license and registration dear."
**The old man hands it to the lady cop and...**
Lady cop - "Oh, I see you are from New York. I used to have a lover from New York, he was the worst lover I ever had."
Old man - "ugh, what did she say?"
Old wife - "Nothing dear, She thinks she used to know you."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
WALKS INTO A BAR... MERMAID s**...
An old man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender notices the guy's head is the size of a cue ball.
"I got to ask, sir," says the bartender. "What happened?"
The old guy sighs and tells him, "My ship was torpedoed by the Germans in WWII. A mermaid rescued me and promised to grant me three wishes. For my first wish, I asked to return to the States. My second wish was to have all the money I would ever need. Finally, my third wish was to have s**... with the mermaid."
"That doesn't sound too bad," says the bartender. "Then what happened?"
"Well," sighs the man, "mermaids can't have s**..., so I asked her if I could just have a little head... ."
Imagine my delight yesterday when my 6yr old told me her new teacher's name is Mrs Watt.
Cue about 10mins of me asking "What's her name?"
And her saying "Mrs Watt"
"I don't know, you tell me, what's her name?"
"Mrs Watt"
"What?"
"Yes"
"What's her name?"
"Mrs Watt"
...
...
...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man walks into a bar...
An old man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender notices the guy's head is the size of a cue ball.
"I got to ask, sir," says the bartender. "What happened?"
The old guy sighs and tells him, "My ship was torpedoed by the Germans in WWII. A mermaid rescued me and promised to grant me three wishes. For my first wish, I asked to return to the States. My second wish was to have all the money I would ever need. Finally, my third wish was to have s**... with the mermaid."
"That doesn't sound too bad," says the bartender. "Then what happened?"
"Well," sighs the man, "mermaids can't have s**..., so I asked her if I could just have a little head... ."
Me: Why did the elephant paint his toenails red?
Them: Why?
Me: To hide in the strawberry patch
Them: ……..
Me: have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch?
Them: no?
Me: then I guess it works
Cue applause.
My girlfriend has the weirdest way of ending the conversation with me...
She always says, "I wanted to tell you something.." and I take my cue to leave.