Ctrl Jokes

Humoristic puns and funny pick up lines



EDIT*: Looks like my CTRL key is broken

A spider crawled into my keyboard earlier.

It's okay, I've got him under Ctrl.

Why did Steve Jobs eat all the cookies?

Mac users have no CTRL

I smashed up my keyboard and couldnt find the last key

I lost Ctrl

So a spider just crawled onto my keyboard

But don't worry I think it's under ctrl.

I ground up my ctrl key and gift wrapped it. The card reads:

This is ground ctrl.
TO: Major Tom

(Merry Christmas David Bowie!)

I have three kids named Ctrl, Alt, and Del.

When they mess up, I hit them all at once.

My internet addiction is so bad...

Its alt of ctrl.

I made this up today. How do you print something when you've really got to go to the toilet?

You ctrl p.

Chuck Norris jokes

When Chuck Norris' code throws exceptions, it's across the room.

Chuck Norris' keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key, because nothing controls Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris can delete the recycling bin.

Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people. And then the grenade exploded.

When Chuck Norris goes into a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off.

Feel free to add more. Shamelessly stolen from the internet.



Edit*: sorry it seems as the CTRL button on my keyboard isn't working



Whoops, lost ctrl.


This was originally a tech support tale but I thought it was funny enough to turn into a joke.

>Speaking to a Canadian: "Hit Ctrl+A."

>Canadian: "Okay, I hit Ctrl, eh? And nothing happened, eh?"

What is Poseidon's favourite shortcut?

ctrl + C

What were Stephen Hawking's last words?

Ctrl + Alt + Del

Teaching my father computer shortcuts

Father: " Son, I just don't understand some of these things, I want to ctrl D but when I do I end of pasting everything?"
My response "No dad, that's ctrl V"
Mother responds " Well he couldn't ctrl his D in my V 15 years ago either!"

How to gain Karma

ctrl + c

ctrl + v



EDIT*: Looks like my CTRL key is broken

My laptop is missing a key.

I lost ctrl.

Ctrl + V


I can't see an end, I have no control and I don't think there's any escape - I don't even have a home anymore...

At least Ctrl C and V still work



Edit; My ctrl button must be broken

Q: What's an emo's favorite key combo?

A: Ctrl + X

What are the funniest ctrl jokes of all time?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking about Ctrl? Well, here are the best Ctrl puns to laugh out loud. Crazy and funny Ctrl pick up lines to share with friends.


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