Crystals Jokes

Following is our collection of temperature puns and crystal one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Crystals jokes for adults, dirty igloo jokes and clean sky dad gags for kids.

The Best Crystals Puns

People have been using crystals and essential oils to protect themselves from covid.

Their corpses smell great and look very fashionable.

A bunch of rocks go to a bar...

The bartender sees them as they come towards him to order drinks, and notices that they are have crystals inside them.

'Where y'all from?' the bartender asks

One of the rocks steps up. 'We're from the local quarry a few blocks away.'

The bartender raises his eyebrows.

'Sorry, we don't serve mine ores.'

You guys just buy into anything big pharma tells you don't you?

You guys just buy into anything big pharma tells you don't you? i'll have you know my son was diagnosed with the measles so I placed various crystals around his bed while he slept to promote the proper aura for healing.

He's dead now but at least he's not autistic

Does silicon make pretty crystals

Of quartz it does

I like my coffee like my women.

Someone secretly replaced my woman with Folger's Crystals. I can't tell the difference.

So I heard this word problem from grade school.....

If you have five crystals, and billy takes four crystals, and sally gives you two crystals, how many crystals do you have?

It was then that I realized the kids were all doing crystal math.

What do you call someone who believes crystals have energy?


Why are bismuth crystals rainbow?

Because they're Bi.

How would you calculate the mass of crystals

using crystal maths

There is an abundance of snowflakes jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 9 funniest jokes and crystals puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any crystal meth witze you can hear about crystals.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes