The Best 75 Crows Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Crows jokes. There are some crows hawks jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these crows crow puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Crows Jokes and Puns
Did you know that a group of crows is called a murder?
Well, technically it's only a murder if there's probable caws.
Did you hear about the guy who killed a group of catholic crows?
It was Mass murder
A little known fact...
Before the crowbar was invented, most crows drank at home.
A joke for the cerebral...What do you call it when a bunch of crows agree to meet later?
Premeditated murder.
What do you call a group of politically similar crows?
A cawcus
Jokes/Puns!
1. What kind of birds always stick together? VEL CROWS.
2. What is a spider's favorite thing to do? SURF THE WEB.
3. What goes around the cow but never moves? THE FENCE.
4. Why didn't cheddar cheese want to hang out with bleu cheese? BECAUSE HE HAD A MOLDY PERSONALITY.
5. Why do fish swim in schools? BECAUSE THEY CANT WALK IN SCHOOLS.
6. How do you catch a unique rabbit? YOU NIQUE UP ON IT.
Why do you never see crows as road kill?
Because when a car comes by they yell: Caw Caw Caw!
The difference between a crow and a raven.
A biologist was asked to finally determine whether crows and ravens are really two different birds. This has been a matter of some conjecture for quite some time. Given only a cursory glance, these birds appear to be one and the same. The biologist spent considerable time watching the birds in their habitat and logging hours of observations. Their beaks were the same, their feet and their bodies showed no variable difference. But, at last, a breakthrough. The long feathers at the tip of a birds wings, the pinion feathers, provided the conclusion that ravens and crows differ. A raven has four pinion feathers and a crow has five pinion feathers. So........................... The difference between ravens and crows is a matter of a pinion.
What do you call a flock of crows who are resisting the urge to sin?
*A tempted murder*
A Psychiatrist is sitting in his office...
When his secretary comes in and says "Sir, there's a man here to see you who thinks he's a flock of crows. If you ask me we should just send him to the loony bin and be done with it."
And the psychiatrist replied "Doris! Are you asking me to commit a murder!?"
Many ravens are called a congress...
Owls are a parliament, eagles are a convocation and crows are a murder.
Does this mean that a group of vultures are a corporation?
You can explore crows buzzards reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean crows cah dad jokes. There are also crows puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
The difference between birds
A new study from a renowned bird journal found the difference between crows and ravens.
Apparently, aside from size, their wings are made differently. The common crow has six pinions per wing, while the raven has only five.
The conclusion: It is only a difference of a pinion.
What do you call two crows sitting in a tree?
Attempted murder
Two crows are loitering in the park; why did they get arrested?
Attempted murder.
Why do crows never get hit by cars?
Because their buddies warn them -- caw, caw, caw!!
A man tried to keep two crows illegally as pets!
He was arrested for attempted murder.
What do you call a group of chickens dressed up like crows?
A murder most fowl.
(I'll see myself out...)
A group of crows killed an innocent person
It really was a murder scene
If you call a group of lions a pride, and a group of crows a murder; what do you call a group of pedophiles?
The British Parliament
A group of naturalists found hundreds of dead crows near highways. They began investigating.
They brought an Ornithologist in, who discovered that 90% had been killed by trucks. After some study, they figured out that it was because the crows could say "Caw!" but not "Truck!"
I called the cops about a murder on my front lawn and they just hung up.
They said that couldn't do anything about crows and to stop calling.
Why was the policeman sent to talk to a bunch of crows?
Because someone said there was a "murder".
Two crows are in jail. What are they in for?
Attempted Murder
What kind of crows stick together?
velcrows
I witnessed a murder in the park last night and called 911
They told me to stop calling and leave the crows alone.
Two crows were sitting on a bench...
They were arrested for attempted murder.
What do you call ravens trying to marry crows.
Conspiracy to commit murder.
I saw a murder today
It was awesome. There must've been 50 crows in it.
What do you call a group of crows dressed as geese?
A murder most fowl
Did you hear about the flock of crows that were sprayed with sewage?
It was a murder most foul.
What's the difference between a crow and a raven?
All birds have tail feathers that help them fly called pinions. Crows have 3 pinions and ravens have 4. The difference is just a matter of a pinion.
A group of crows framed my friend, ultimately leading to his death
I swear I'll find the murder who criminalized him!
How come crows never get hit by cars?
Their buddies are up in the trees yelling caaaawr caaawr caaawr.
What is the difference between a raven and a crow??
Well, ravens and crows both have large feathers on their wings called 'pinions'. Ravens have 4 pinions on each wing while crows only have 3.
So if you think about it, it's just a matter of a pinion
Crows make black babies. Doves make white babies. What makes no babies?
Swallows.
A woman is looking at herself in the mirror
"Ugh I look so old! My skin is sagging, my hair is turning gray, I've got crows feet..."
Her husband says, "well, at least your eyesight is intact."
A herd of cattle... A murder of crows...
...a migraine of children...
What do you call a group of crows who see food?
A tempted murder.
I'll see myself out now.
What does your future and a group of crows have in common?
A murder
I nearly ran over a couple of crows with my car today.
It was almost a murder.
Did you hear about the doctor who sent a group of crows to a mental health institution?
He committed a murder.
It's only a murder of crows...
... if there's probable caws.
What do you call 2 Crows sat on a branch?
attempted murder.
My friend hated crows so much that he wanted to kill them. One time, I caught him staring intensely at a group of crows...
You could see the murder in his eyes.
Boston's dead crows
On interstate I-95 running from Boston to New Hampshire they had a problem with crows being hit by vehicles. They were being killed by the hundreds. They hired a professor from MIT to figure out why so many crows were being hit. He discovered that when crows land to feed, they leave one crow in the tree to watch for danger. They found out that the Boston crows could say caw caw but they couldn't say truck truck .
I called the police to report a murder in my front yard but they refused to respond
They said if I really wanted the crows gone I'd have to do it myself
I tried to get a group of crows together but they wouldn't cooperate.
It was an attempted murder.
If a group of crows is a murder...
...then a group of crows spaced evenly between two margins is a justified murder.
A group of crows is called a murder of crows....
A group of crows aligned evenly to both margins is justified murder.
I saw a murder once
I've never seen so many crows at one time!
i told the police that there was a murder of crows on my front lawn but nobody came.
So much for lawn order.
What do you call a flock of crows eyeing a cake?
A tempted murder.
My Chinese neighbour said he's just opened a crows shop.
Speaking slowly, I said "you mean a *clothes* shop?"
He says, "No, a crows shop - come in and have a rook."
A group of crows is called a murder, a group of cows is called a herd. What do you call a group of lesbians?
...a lick.
What's the difference between a rooster and a nymphomaniac?
The rooster crows : **"Cock-a-doodle-doo"**
The nymphomaniac goes :**"Any-Cock-will-dooo"**
I heard two crows got arrested
The charge was attempted murder
My roommate got in trouble with the police because he had two crows in our apartment as pets.
The cops arrested him for attempted murder.
What do you call a plan to kill a bunch of crows that are hanging around on a gravestone?
A plot to murder a murder plot's murder.
It's COVID-19, not CORVID-19. A corvid is of the crow family. 19 crows are not gathering to kill you...
But if they are... its a murder.
In a society of crows,
All unsolved crimes are murder mysteries.
Before the crowbar was invented...
Most crows drank at home
If you see a bunch of big black birds
Don't automatically assume it's a murder of crows.
You can't have a murder without probable caws.
How do the crows in Texas greet each other?
Yee-caw
Did you hear why those two crows went to jail?
Attempted murder.
Before the crowbar was invented
Most crows didn't drink.
I whisper my sins to crows
So my parents can't hear me confess to a murder
I saw a murder on my way home today.
I don't know what was happening but all of a sudden there were hundreds of crows.
Three crows planned a meeting and only two of them showed up
They were charged for attempted murder
What do you call a group of 10 chickens and 5 crows
A murder most fowl
A group of crows is called a murder. What do you call a group of Karens??
A migraine.
What do you call two crows?
Attempted murder.
Before crowbars were invented......
...most crows drank at home by themselves.
Why are flights with crows often delayed?
Because they bring a lot of extra carrion luggage.
What do you call a bunch of crows trying to organize a gang?
Attempted murder
A bunch of crows live in our neighborhood so I am constantly making jokes about "(attempted) murder."
It's not that funny anymore and it's driving my wife insane, but I'm just setting up a big laugh for when the judge reads the charges against her.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the crows bird jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working crows caw piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.