Crossword Puzzles Jokes
46 crossword puzzles jokes and hilarious crossword puzzles puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about crossword puzzles that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Crossword Puzzles Short Jokes
Short crossword puzzles jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The crossword puzzles humour may include short crossword puzzle jokes also.
- Why is Jesus never able to finish more than half of a crossword puzzle? He always gets stuck on across.
- A cyclops was doing a crossword puzzle and asked his wife, "Hun, how do you spell Hawaii?" Biting her lip, she replied, "I think you need 2 'i's."
- The inventor of the crossword puzzle moved into my neighbourhood. He lives five streets down and two houses across.
- My dad's answer to everything is alcohol. He doesn't drink, it's just that he's really bad at crossword puzzles.
- I'm making my own Crossword Puzzle but I'm struggling to think up a clue for 3 down, 'Armageddon'. Ah well, it's not the end of the world.
- I believe pencils are superior to pens, especially for filling out crossword puzzles. Does that make me erasist?
- A Wrong Answer While doing a crossword puzzle, I asked for my husband's help.
"The word is eight letters long and starts with m, and the clue is 'tiresome sameness.'"
"Monogamy," he answered - Did you hear about the crossword puzzle enthusiast who recently died? He was buried 4 down and six across.
- Why do ghosts like to haunt pubs? For the boos!
*^i'm ^^so ^^^sorry*
This was actually in a crossword puzzle I did recently. - I told my wife to quit thinking outside the box. So she bought a new refrigerator and did a crossword puzzle inside the carton.
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Crossword Puzzles One Liners
Which crossword puzzles one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with crossword puzzles? I can suggest the ones about crossword and crossword clue.
- Why is Jesus bad at crossword puzzles? He always gets stuck on 2 Across.
- What is God's favorite puzzle? Crosswords.
- The inventor of the crossword puzzle lives near me. Street's three across and two down.
- How did the priest finish the crossword puzzle? He got 2 across.
- If you see someone doing a crossword puzzle Whisper in their ear, 7 up is lemonade.
- Can anyone help me with my Easter crossword puzzle? 2 across "where they nailed Jesus"?
- Why shouldn't you bug anyone working on puzzles? You'll probably end up with crosswords
Crossword Puzzles Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about crossword puzzles you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean jigsaw puzzle jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make crossword puzzles pranks.
Johny went to the butchery, because he wanted to buy a little brain, so he has asked the saleswoman: "have you got a little brain?"
The saleswoman has said: "yes, we have."
Johny has asked her: "and is the little brain still fresh?"
The saleswoman has said: "yes, yesterday he has successfully solved the crossword puzzles."
Crossword Puzzle Pope
A businessman is getting on a flight when he hears from another passenger that the Pope is going to be on the flight.
"WOW, great!" he thinks, being a devout Christian, "What a good place to be today."
Just before the aircraft doors are closed the Pope enters the plane and sits next to him.
I am surely blessed the man thinks. Here I am, a good Catholic on a flight with the Pope sitting next to me.
The plane takes off and after a few minutes the passengers take off their seat belts.
The man looks sideways and sees the Pope reaching into his bag to take out a crossword book. Marvelous, he thinks, not only am I blessed with the Pope next to me but he does crosswords and so do I. He notices that the Pope is working his way through the puzzle, and that the Pope is tapping his pencil, thinking.
The Pope turns to him and says, "I usually don't talk to anyone on flights, but I wonder if you can help me?"
"Anything, your Eminence ... What is it?"
"Do you know a four letter word that ends in 'u-n-t' that means something associated with women?"
The man feels uncomfortable. He thinks and thinks. Finally he says, "The only word I can think of is aunt."
The Pope looks at him and asks, "Do you have an eraser?"
A man was sitting next to the Pope on an airplane.
The Pope was doing a crossword puzzle. Suddenly, the Pope turns to the man and asks, "My son, do you know a four letter word referring to a woman?"
The man, having just gotten out of a terrible relationship, could easily think of one, but he knew the Pope wouldn't appreciate it. Instead, he says, "Father, the word you are looking for is 'aunt'."
"Ah," said the Pope. "I don't suppose you have an eraser?"
James Thurber's crossword puzzle.
Laid up in the hospital, James Thurber passed the time doing crossword puzzles.
One day he asked a nurse, What seven-letter word has three u's in it?
She said, I don't know, but it must be unusual.
A man is sitting on a plane next to the pope...
The pope was working on a crossword puzzle and the man saw that one of the problems was a four letter word for female that ended in "unt".
The man wanted to help the pope, but really didn't want to say the answer. Finally, after thinking and thinking, the man tells the pope "aunt". The pope thanks the man and erases his answer.
Mental Hospital [2]
One morning, a nurse was tasked to check on some their patients' progress and will send recommendations for release based on their improvement. She visited the recreation room where there were 4 patients.
**Patient One** was reading the bible. Complimented the patient and puts a check on the name.
**Patient Two** was working on a crossword puzzle, almost done. Check.
**Patient Three** was playing chess, keeping tabs of his moves, challenging himself. Check.
She comes to **Patient Four**, who was standing on the table, repeatedly shouting *"I AM THE SUN! I AM THE LIGHT!"*. The nurse asks the patient to step down from the table or else she'll have the guards take him away back to his room.
As soon as Patient Four steps down, the other three patients suddenly stopped what they were doing, went on their way and bid everyone in the room *"Goodnight!"*
So the Pope is doing a crossword puzzle when a Bishop walks in.
"What is a four letter word for a woman that ends in -unt?" the Pope asks. The Bishop thinks for a minute, afraid to say such a word to the holiest of men. Then a miracle comes to him. "A-unt?" he suggests. "Yes, that fits better, got an eraser?"
Priest does a crossword puzzle
A gentleman sits next to a priest on an airplane. He sees the priest doing a crossword puzzle.
Time passes and the priest says, "Excuse me, sir, but do you know a four letter word that describes a woman and ends in 'u-n-t'?"
The gentleman thinks about this and finally says, "I believe the word you're looking for is 'aunt.'"
The priest replies, "Oh, you're right. That fits, too. Would you happen to have an eraser?"
A guy on a train is sitting next to a nun who is doing a crossword puzzle.
The nun is stuck on a clue that doesn't fit with some other answers that she's already written down. She asks the man for help.
"Let's backtrack, and double check that your other answers are right. That usually helps me," he says.
"Good idea," the nun says. "How about this one: A four-letter word, ending in 'U-N-T,' and the clue is 'Something you would call a woman.'"
"Aunt?" The man says.
"Oh, right..." the nun says. "Say, do you have an eraser?"
Four across...
Two men are sat completing a crossword puzzle on a train, sat across from them is a Priest. The first man starts to scratch his head, and he asks the man across from him:
"A word, four across, ending with unt..."
The other man asks him:
"Well, what's the clue?"
He replies:
"It just says 'a woman,' that's all."
"Aunt?"
"Ah, yes it is!"
The man looks down, nodding in agreement. Across the carriage a feeble voice, the Priest.
"Can I borrow an eraser?"
Why is McGregor a crossword puzzle boxer?
You enter the ring vertical and leave horizontal!
The Pope and one of the Cardinals were sitting around doing crossword puzzles.
The Pope says, "Can you think of a four-letter word meaning 'woman' that ends with the letters, U-N-T?"
The Cardinal thinks for a moment. "Why yes, father. That would be 'AUNT'"
The Pope laughs, "YES! Of course! ...ha ha ha..." (pause) "Got an eraser?"
What did the dad say when his daughter asked for help with a crossword puzzle?
"That's not my across to bear."
A man boards a plane and, to his surprise, finds the pope in the seat next to him...
Shortly after takeoff, the pope opens the newspaper and starts working on the crossword puzzle. Almost immediately the pope turns to the man and says, Execuse me, do you know a four-letter word that ends in 'unt' and refers to a woman?
Just one word leapt to mind, an extremely v**... one. The man thinks to himself, I can't suggest *that* word to the pope. There must be another word . . .
Then it hits him. He turns to the pope and says, I think the word you're looking for is 'aunt.'
Of course! Exclaims the pope. I don't suppose you have an eraser?
Two men are solving a crossword puzzle.
- Is it a women's s**... o**...?
Do you write the answer horizontally or vertically?
- Horizontally.
- Write: mouth!
I had to turn to Google for help with a crossword puzzle.
I had to turn to Google for help with a crossword puzzle. The clue was "Dishonestly gaining a advantage," eight letters.
I immediately felt bad for looking it up, that was cheating.
A gentleman is preparing to board a plane when he hears that the Pope is on the same flight.
Imagine his surprise when the Pope sits down in the seat next to him.
Shortly after take-off, the Pope starts a crossword puzzle. Almost immediately, the Pope turns to the gentleman and says, Excuse me, but would you know a four letter word ending in 'u-n-t' that refers to a woman?
Oh my god! the man thought. I can't tell the Pope that. There must be another word. The gentleman thinks for quite a while, then it hits him. Turning to the Pope, the gentleman says, I think the word you're looking for is 'Aunt'.
Oh, of course! the Pope exclaims. Do you have an eraser?
This is a good joke to play on others. Pretend you're trying to solve a crossword puzzle- and say aloud "Postman -blank-. Any ideas?"
They'll likely say something like "Postman Pat" to which you reply- "no that doesn't fit.".
Then- if they're not completely thick- they should ask "How many letters?" and you tell 'em "A SACKFUL!"
Then they'll leave in disgust.
What do clowns fill their cars with?
Laughing gas!
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This has probably been made before, but I just thought of it after my mom, while doing her crossword puzzle, said aloud "fuel for a funny car" and I suggested laughing gas. It wasn't the right answer, unfortunately.
Two men are sitting next to one another on a plane...
The o**... is doing a crossword puzzle and is growing increasingly agitated.
Need any help? , says the guy on the aisle.
Thanks. I need a four letter word for a female, ending in 'unt' .
Aunt?
Wow! Thanks!
No problem. Anything else?
Um... you wouldn't happen to have an eraser, would you?
Crossword
The Pope is doing a crossword puzzle at the Vatican. He turns to the Cardinal and asks, What is a word for a woman that ends in 'u-n-t'?
The Cardinal says, Aunt.
The Pope says, Got an eraser?
I was doing the crossword puzzle at breakfast and asked my wife for some help.
I asked, "What's a word used to express a lack of understanding?"
She said "Huh?"
I said, "What's a word used to express a lack of understanding?"
She said "Huh?"
I tried one more time, "What's a word used to express a lack of understanding?"
For some reason, she got up and stormed out of the kitchen. So now I'm in trouble and I still haven't finished my puzzle. Not a great start to the day...