Crosseyed Jokes
56 crosseyed jokes and hilarious crosseyed puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about crosseyed that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Crosseyed jokes are the best! If you're looking for a good laugh, then look no further than this hilarious collection of crosseyed jokes. From clever puns to silly one-liners, these jokes are sure to get you chuckling. So go ahead and cross your eyes, because these crosseyed jokes are guaranteed to make you smile.
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Funniest Crosseyed Short Jokes
Short crosseyed jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The crosseyed humour may include short lazy eye jokes also.
- My cross-eyed wife and I just got a divorce.... We didn't see eye to eye. I also found out she was seeing someone on the side.
- I had to break up with my cross-eyed girlfriend... Apparently, she was seeing someone else on the side.
- I used to date a cross-eyed girl. I stopped when I found out she was seeing someone on the side.
- I broke up with my cross-eyed girlfriend today Turns out she was seeing someone on the side
- I broke up with my cross-eyed girlfriend. We weren't seeing eye-to-eye and she was seeing some dude on the side.
- You guys hear about the insecure cross-eyed teacher?? Apparently he couldn't control his pupils
- I used to date this cross-eyed chick We didn't last. We did not see eye-to-eye.
It's OK though. She was seeing someone on the side anyway. - I dated a cross-eyed girl once, but it didn't end well. Turned out she was seeing other people.
- My cross-eyed friend was just diagnosed with depression. I'm not surprised - he never looks forward to anything.
- I've been dating a cross-eyed woman for 3 months now. But I don't think it's gonna last. We just don't see eye to eye.
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Crosseyed One Liners
Which crosseyed one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with crosseyed? I can suggest the ones about eyed and heavy.
- There was a cross-eyed teacher who got fired Because she couldnt control her pupils.
- I had to break up with my cross-eyed girlfriend today. She was seeing other people.
- Why did the cross-eyed teacher get fired? She didn't have control of her pupils
- The cross-eyed teacher at school got fired today. He couldn't control his pupils.
- Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher? She couldn't control her pupils.
- I used to date a girl who was cross-eyed... She was seeing someone else.
- Did you hear about the cross-eyed circumciser? He got the sack.
- Breaking News!! Cross-Eyed circumsiser gets the sack.
- Why was the cross-eyed teacher fired? Because they couldn't control their pupils.
- Never date cross-eyed people They're usually seeing someone on the side
- Did you hear about the cross-eyed carpenter? He *literally* can't even.
- A cross-eyed teacher Got fired because he couldn't control his pupils
- Pick up lines for cross-eyed people When you're in the room both my eyes are on you
- Me and my cross-eyed wife got a divorce. We just couldn't see eye to eye.
- Why was the teacher cross-eyed? She couldn't control her pupils
Charming Humor Crosseyed Jokes with Loads of Fun
What funny jokes about crosseyed you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean teeth jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make crosseyed pranks.
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet...
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. 'My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?' 'Okay,' says the vet. 'Let's have a look at him.' So he picks up the dog examines his eyes and checks his teeth. Finally he says, 'I'm going to have to put him down.' 'What? Because he's cross-eyed?' asks the man. 'No,' replies the vet. 'Because he's really, really heavy.'
Being cross-eyed has made it difficult for me to stay in monogamous relationships
Sometimes when I'm seeing a girl I can't help but also see someone else on the side
I thought my dog looked a little cross-eyed...
I took my dog to the vet, as I noticed his eyes were strangely crossed. When I got to the office, I told the vet the problem with my dog. He picked up my dog and stared into his eyes for a while. Then he spoke up "I'm going to have to put your dog down." he said. "What? Just because he's cross-eyed?" I exclaimed. "No." the vet said "Because he's heavy!"
a man takes his crossed-eyed bull dog to the vet..
The vet examines him, looks in his eyes, ears, mouth.
he picks up the dog and checks his legs and belly. finally, the vet says "i'm gonna have to put him down"
"because he's cross-eyed?" asks the man
"no, because he's really heavy."
I had a terrible cross-eyed teacher in primary schoool
She could never keep her pupils under control.
Ladies and gentlemen
Ladies and gentlemen, hobos and tramps
Crosseyed mosquitos and bowlegged ants
I've come to tell you a lie that is true.
One fine day in the middle of the night
Two dead boys rose up to fight.
Back to back they faced each other
Pulled out knives and shot each other.
Two deaf policemen heard the noise
And ran to save the two dead boys.
If you don't believe this lie is true
Go ask the blind man, he saw it too.
Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who got fired?
She couldn't keep her pupils straight
A man takes his Rottweiller to the vet.
'My dog is cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?' 'Well,' said the vet, 'let's have a look at him'.
So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then he checks his teeth. Finally, he says, 'I'm going to have to put him down.' 'What? Because he's cross-eyed?' 'No, because he's really heavy'.
Two Jewish men are standing in the bathroom and peeing in adjacent urinals
the one to the right finishes doing his business, turns around, and says to his neighbor, Tell me, did Mohel Rabinovich do your bris [i.e. circumcision]? Yes, the other guy responds, how did you know?!!! Well, Rabinovich is a little cross-eyed and you are peeing on my shoes!
Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job?
She couldn't control her pupils.
Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher that got killed by her students?
She couldn't control her pupils.
The cross-eyed judge looked at the 3 defendants
How do you plead? he asked the first man. Not guilty, said the second. I wasn't talking to you, said the judge. I didn't say a word, said the third.
I broke off my relationship with my cross-eyed girlfriend
She was seeing someone on the side
A friend of mine broke up with his cross-eyed Girl Friend...
They just weren't seeing eye to eye, and I heard she was seeing someone on the side.
Have you heard about the cross-eyed teacher?
He has a lot of trouble controlling his pupils.
Poor dog….
A man takes his rottweiler to the vet.
"Can you have a look at him he says,
I think he's cross-eyed"
So the vet picks up the dog
and examines him.
"I'm going to have to put him
down," says the vet.
"Why, just because he's cross eyed?"
"No, says the vet, "because he's heavy!"
A cross-eyed dog
A man takes his dog to the vet.
'My dog is cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?'
'Well,' said the vet, 'let's have a look at him'.
So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then he checks his teeth. et.c.
Finally, he says, 'I'm going to put him down.'
'What!? Because he's cross-eyed?'
'No, because he's really heavy'.
Harry is dating a cross-eyed girl
He walks into the bar and the bartender says, "Hey, Harry, you still going out with that cute cross-eyed girl?"
Harry says, "No. I found out she was seeing other guys on the side."
My advice: You should never date a cross-eyed girl.
I guarantee she'll be seeing someone else.
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet…
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet.
Sick
"Can you have a look at him," he says,
"I think he's cross-eyed".
So the vet picks up the dog and examines him.
"I'm going to have to put him down," says the vet.
"Why, just because he's cross eyed?"
"No," says the vet, "because he's heavy!"
