Cross The Road Jokes
168 cross the road jokes and hilarious cross the road puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cross the road that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Cross The Road Short Jokes
Short cross the road jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The cross the road humour may include short cross the street jokes also.
- One day I changed a lightbulb, crossed the road, and walked into a bar. Then I realized my whole life was a joke.
- Why did the pig cross the road? Because the chicken told him to teargas protestors for a photo-op
- Why did the EA executive cross the road? Buy the DLC to find out!
Alternate ending available if you purchase the season pass! - Why did the ghost cross the road? To come back from the other side.
- Why did the PowerPoint presentation cross the road? To get to the other slide
- Ok my 4 year old came up with this one, not sure he really understands how clever it is though... Why did the Dragon Cross the Road? He wanted to eat some chicken.
- Why did the turkey cross the road? To prove it wasn't chicken.
- Why did the tornado cross the road? To get the road to the other side.
- Why did EA games management cross the road If you wanna find out, please buy the Punchline dlc for 49.99$ or have a chance to get it from a loot box for 2.99$ each
- why did my wife cross the road? To go back into the first clothes shop we went into two hours ago.
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Cross The Road One Liners
Which cross the road one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with cross the road? I can suggest the ones about crossing the road and crossing the street.
- Why did the console player cross the road? To render the buildings on the other side.
- Why did the chicken cross the road? Because of a rotten banana or whatever.
- Why did the chicken cross the road? To take a photo in front of a church.
- Why did Bill Barr gas protestors? So the chicken could cross the road
- Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape Kim Jong Un's long range missiles.
- Why the crab cross the road? It didn't, it used the sidewalk.
- Why did the vegan cross the road? To tell someone he was a vegan.
- Why did princess Diana cross the road She wasn't wearing her seatbelt
- Why did Goku cross the road? Find out next time on Dragonball Z!
- Why did the plant-based chicken cross the road? Idk, it's beyond meat.
- Why did Paul Walker cross the road? Because he wasn't wearing a seat belt.
- Why did the double agent cross the road? Because he never really was on your side.
- Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.
- Why Did the mother in law cross the road? She thought it was a boundary.
- I grilled a chicken for 2 hours. It still wouldn't tell me why it crossed the road.
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road Jokes
Here is a list of funny why did the chicken cross the road jokes and even better why did the chicken cross the road puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the accordion player.
- Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the other chickens weren't wearing masks
- Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was a chicken
- Why did the chicken cross the road? To find people who care about its cake day.
- Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to show the other chickens that it had guts. (Courtesy of my daughter)
- Why did the chicken cross the road? To push Jake off a cliff.... he really hates Jake.
as told by my 6 year old who hates a kid named Jake. - What do you call a chicken who crosses the road, rolls in the mud, and then crosses back again? A dirty double-crosser.
- Why did the rooster cross the road? He saw a sign that said "Chicken strips for a buck"!
- Why did the voodoo chicken cross the road? To get to his friends on the other side.
- Why did the chicken cross the road? For some fowl reason, probably.
Chicken Cross The Road Jokes
Here is a list of funny chicken cross the road jokes and even better chicken cross the road puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why did the chicken cross the road? The road betrayed it first.
- Why did the chicken cross the road with a secret document? Who needs to know?
- Why did the Texan chicken cross the road? To prove to the armadillo that it could be done.
- Why did the chicken cross the road?
Me:I don't know why?
6: He didnt, he got hit by a truck! - Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by car!
A joke from my 5 year old! - Why did the chicken cross the road? The road was inanimate and couldn't cross the chicken.
- Why did the chicken cross the road? He was feeling cooped up.
In so sorry, I know its lame, but I heard it at work and had to share... - Why did the chicken cross the road? To show the possum it could be done...
- I saw Usain Bolt sprinting around the track shouting, "Why did the chicken cross the road!?" It was a running joke.
- Why did the chicken cross the road? To bock traffic.
(A kid I work with told this to me with the biggest grin on their face, I had a laugh and felt the need to share this.)
Why Did The Turkey Cross The Road Jokes
Here is a list of funny why did the turkey cross the road jokes and even better why did the turkey cross the road puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Q: Why did the fat turkey cross the road?
A: To get hit by my car. - Why did the turkey cross the road? Because he's in my belly and he has to go where ever I go from now on...
- Why did the turkey cross the road? It was the chicken’s day off!
- Why did the turkey cross the road? Because it had a gobble cups of coffee.
- Why did the turkey cross the road? To get some Morepork
- why did the Turkey cross the road? It was feeling a little bit cooped up
- Why did the turkey cross the road Her didn't want to end up near the sides.
PS, happy thanksgiving - Why did the turkey cross the road? To get away from Bill Cosby
Why Did The Cow Cross The Road Jokes
Here is a list of funny why did the cow cross the road jokes and even better why did the cow cross the road puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why did the cow cross the road? To get to her Women's Rights meeting
- Why did the cow cross the road To get to the udder side
- Told this joke when I was three Me: "Why did the cow cross the road?"
Parent: "Wh-"
Me: "Moo!" - Why did the cows cross the road? They wanted to go to the mooo....vies
- Why did the cow cross the road? To pick you up from school
- Why did cow cross the road? Because grass is always greener on the other side.
- Q: why did the cow cross the road?
A: So he could pass the milkyway. - Why did the cow cross the road? To get to her comedy special
- Why Did The Cow Cross The Road?
- What did the cow say when it crossed the road. Not moo but neigh
Giggle-Inducing Cross The Road Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends
What funny jokes about cross the road you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean cross road jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make cross the road pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the dog cross the road, roll in the dirt, and cross the road again?
Because he's a dirty, double-crossing son of a b*t**....
*edit* And a such GOOD one, yes he IS!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Me: Why?
Him: To get to the s**... persons house.
Me: *voluntary laugh as older cousin*
Him: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
Him: It's the chicken!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My 10 y/o son told me this.
Him: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Me: Why?
Him: To find the idiot.
Him: Knock knock
Me: Who's there?
Him: The chicken...
I saw it coming with the knock knock joke but it made me laugh.
Two men are walking down the street
When they see 3 guys across the road beating up an older woman. Fred turns to George and says
"Hey, isn't that your mother in law over there?"
"So it is." replies George
"Well aren't you going to help?!" Fred asked.
"Nah," George replied, "I think 3 should be enough"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My cute younger brother's contribution.
Brother: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Me: Don't know, why?
Brother: To go to the ugly guy's house.
Me: Huh??
Brother: Knock, knock.
Me: Who's there?
Brother: The chicken.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Q:Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To visit his friend the d**....
M: Knock knock
Y: Who's there
M: Your friend the chicken!
[My 7yo told me this one and caught me off guard...]
The guessing game
Tired of constant blonde jokes, a blonde dyes her hair brown.
She then goes for a drive in the country and sees a shepherd herding his sheep across the road.
\- "Hey, shepherd, if I guess how many sheep are here, can I keep one?"
The shepherd is puzzled but agrees. She blurts out "352!"
He is stunned but keeps his word and allows her to pick a sheep.
\- "I'll take this one," she says proudly. "It's the cutest!"
\- "Hey lady," says the shepherd, "if I guess your real hair color, can I have my dog back?"
Tired of constant blonde jokes, a blonde dyes her hair brown. She then goes for a drive in the country and sees a shepherd herding his sheep across the road.
"Hey, shepherd, if I guess how many sheep are here, can I keep one?"
The shepherd is puzzled but agrees. She blurts out "352!"
He is stunned but keeps his word and allows her to pick a sheep.
"I'll take this one," she says proudly. "It's the cutest!"
"Hey lady," says the shepherd, "If I guess your real hair color, can I have my dog back?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did Kelly Clarkson cross the road?
Because of you.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the dummies house.
Knock knock... Who's there?
A chicken.
My 6 year old nephew's favorite joke. Tells it every chance he gets.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
This is My "classic" joke
A Catholic Priest, a Rabbi, and an Atheist walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Oh g**..., no! We don't like jokes in here and if you guys are a part of one, you're gonna have to leave right now!" So the catholic priest, rabbi, and atheist leave the bar and a chicken walks in. The bartender says, "OH COME ON! We don't serve CHICKENS in here!" The chicken says, "Do you know somewhere that does?" The bartender says, "Yeah.." The chicken asks, "Well, where is it?" The bartender says, "It's across the road."
Why did the ghost cross the road?
Because it was a poultrygeist.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I found myself in a pub in Cork, Ireland.
A group of American tourists came in.
One of the Americans said, in a loud voice, "I hear you Irish think you're great drinkers. I bet $5,000 that no one here can drink 20 pints of Guinness in 30 minutes."
The bar was silent, but the American noticed one Irishman leaving. No one took up the bet.
40 minutes later, the Irishman who left returned and said, "Hey y**..., is yer bet still on?"
"Sure" said the American, "20 pints in 30 minutes for a bet of $5,000 ."
"Grand, " replied the Irishman, "so pour the pints and start the clock."
It was very close but the last drop was consumed with 2 seconds to spare.
OK y**..., pay up." said the Irishman.
"I'm happy to pay, here's your money" said the American. "But tell me, when I first offered the wager, I saw you leave. Where did you go?'
"Well sir", replied the Irishman, "$5,000 is a lot of money to a man like me, so I went to the pub across the road to see if I could do it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Priest, Rabbi and Atheist walk into a bar and each ask for a drink
The bartender, saying nothing and looking disdained, points to a sign clearly labelled: **NO JOKES SERVED HERE**
Without a fight the Priest, Rabbi and Atheist leave the bar, heads hanging.
The next day a chicken walks in and plops down on the barstool.
Wiping the inside of a glass, the bartender approached and asks the chicken Are you part of this joke?
Yeah. the chicken replies.
Again, he points to the sign: **NO JOKES SERVED HERE**
The chicks argues Well then how's a chicken supposed to get his beak wet?
The bartender pointed out the window and said There's another bar across the road.
Why did the man with one hand cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
I'll show myself out.
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?
Because it got stuck in a crack.
(This joke was my daughters suggestion)
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Princess Diana Jokes
What's the difference between Princess Diana and a blade of grass? About six feet.
How is Princess Diana like a mobile phone? Both die in tunnels.
Where does Diana stay when she visits Paris? Any place she can c**....
How is Princess Diana like breaking a bone? Both need a doctor to remove the plaster of paris.
What's the difference between Princess Diana and thirty-nine pennies? It's easier to scrape together thirty-nine pennies.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road? Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt.
What's the difference between Princess Diana an Casper the ghost? Casper can go through walls, Diana can't.
What's the difference between a Mercedes and Princess Diana? A Mercedes will easily reach 40.
What would Di be doing if she were alive today? Scratching at the lid of her coffin.
Yes I am a horrible person wow.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Knock !!!!
My daughter told me this one. I hadn't heard it before.
daughter: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Me: I don't know.
daughter: She was going to visit the d**....
Me: ?
daughter: Knock, knock
Me: Who's there?
daughter: The Chicken
Me: :/
Why did the accordion cross the road? To get to the polka party on the other side.
Why did the water cross the road?
Because it didn't give a dam!
-my 5 year old daughter
Why didn't the number 3 cross the road?
He saw a sign that said no trespassing.
Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side
Why did the accordionist cross the road? To escape from the angry mob of bar patrons.
Why did my abusive father cross the road?
Beats me
Why did the German cross the road?
Because the electronic traffic signal indicated that it was the appropriate time to do so.
My 5 year olds joke
Why did the turtle cross the road
To get to the shell station
Why did the baby chick cross the road on the spring equinox? To say, Cheep cheep, happy spring!
Why did the suicidal guy cross the road?
To get to the other side.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the limp Donkey cross the road ?..ahh forget it
.. sorry for such a lame a**... joke.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the Muslim cross the road?
To get to the bigger crowd
Why did the little girl cross the road?
She wasn't wearing her seatbelt.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
Momentum.
Why did the blind man cross the road?
Because he couldn't hear the Tesla coming
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because it had crippling depression, it was constantly reminded that it's life was worthless to those it was looked down on by. A mere piece of meat, not a living creature, worthy of respect, and dignity. It didn't want to live in a constant state of fear and depression, knowing that it's only purpose in life would be death. So it escaped the farm, and took off to the highway... it saw the lights, and though the creature feared death, it was relieved to be free from the fear that plagued it.
So in short... to get to the other side.
Why did the politician cross the road?
Because he said he wouldn't
Why did the athiest refuse to cross the road?
He didn't believe in the other side.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the brother cross the road?
Because his sister f**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the chicken cross the road? (Courtesy of my 5 year old)
Because chickens are s**...!
Why did Mike Tyson cross the road?
To get to the other thide
Why did Chuck Norris cross the Road?
Well, the road wasn't going to cross Chuck Norris.
Why did the flock of geese cross the road?
Because they were afraid to fly United.
Why did the duck cross the road?
Waiter:"I don't know and I don't care, how exactly do you plan to pay for the meal you just bought Mr.Chicken?"
Chicken:"Just put it on my bill."
Waiter:"You don't have a bill..."
Chicken:"No bill? oh you shouldn't have, I'll see myself out!"
Why did the whale cross the road?
Because there was a tsunami.
Why didn't the one handed man cross the road?
Because the second hand store was closed.
Why did the grape cross the road?
No raisin.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Tried to cash in on this kid joke thing. My daughter is a disappointment.
Why did the skeleton cross the road? He didn't because he doesn't have skin and he just fell apart.
Why did the ChatGPT cross the road? To get to the other side of the conversation.
Why did the angry Jedi cross the road?
To get to the Dark Side.
Happy May 4th
My 9 year old daughter's joke
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
He didn't have the guts.
Why'd it take so long for the two legged cat to cross the road?
It had two paws
