Crocs Jokes

Following is our collection of boots puns and sandal one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Crocs jokes for adults, dirty sneaker jokes and clean loafers dad gags for kids.

The Best Crocs Puns

I dont believe in hitting my children as punishment

So i send them to school wearing crocs and anime shirts and let other kids beat them instead

did you hear about the Ethiopian who fell into the crocodile pit?

he ate 6 crocs before they could pull him out.

Someone once told me that wearing crocs is like getting a BJ from a guy

Might feel good an all, but once you look down you realize...... Your gay

What do Crocs and getting a bj by a dude have in common?

They both feel fantastic till you look down and realize you're gay.

I bent down in a bar.

"Excuse me," said the girl next to me. "Are you looking up my skirt?"

I said, "No, no I'm tying my shoelace."

She said, "You're wearing Crocs."


If you arrive fashionably late in crocs...

you're just late.

If I had a penny for every time a woman called me sexy...

I wouldn't be able to afford another pair of Crocs.

I hate crocs

They're super uncomfortable. Especially when you're riding on their back.

A couple of unemployed tough guys see a pair of crocodile shoes in a store window.

The one turns to the other and says, "Look at that price tag! I tell you there's money to be made there!"

So they spend the next 4 weeks in Florida hunting crocs. They kill several, eventually running out of bullets and resorting to a knife at first, then their bare hands.

The first one turns to the other and says, "I'll tell you what, if this next croc we see doesn't have shoes on I quit."

Why does Jesus wear Crocs?

Because they're holy.

What does Elvis wear on his feet when he can't find his Blue Suede Shoes?

His Jailhouse Crocs


Why do Crocs not go to heaven?

Because they have no soles.

What did the crocs say to the shoelace

You trippin

What did the Florida boy have on his feet?

Crocs

A man arrived to a party fashionably late in Crocs.

He was just late.

Wearing crocs is pretty similar to being blown by a dude.

Feels pretty nice, then you look down and realize how gay it is.

Why do crocs have a strap on the back of them?

So they stay on during sex.

How do I get my Crocs to stop squeaking?

My sanity is beginning to slip...

Wearing Crocs is like getting a BJ from a dude

They both feel great until you look down.


Sharks Crocs and Jags are now applying at UA

UA seems to think beating punching and dragging are old. They want to deal out a real bite in treating the customers.

Wearing crocs is like being sucked off by a man

Feels great until you look down and realise you're gay

What do crocs and getting a blow job from a guy have it common?

It feels good at the time until you look down and realize you're gay.

Why do crocs have holes in them?

So your dignity can drain out.

Crocs aren't something you want on your feet.

The shoes suck too.

If you can't say anything nice to somebody

give them a chance to change out of their Crocs first.

How do you know for sure that a farmer means business?

He puts his Crocs on.

Disney Donates $1 Million to Orlando Shooting Victims

the resulting rise in demand for Crocs may devour the competition

I said to the shoe salesman

- I'd like to return these shoes... They've got holes in them!

Shoe Salesman - Hmmmm yes, that certainly seems to be the Crocs of the matter.

peopel buy it from their crocs so

do you buy it from the croc store?

There is an abundance of socks jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 29 funniest jokes and crocs puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any vans witze you can hear about crocs.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

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