Criticism Jokes
52 criticism jokes and hilarious criticism puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about criticism that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
From Presley to transsexuals, criticism jokes have been a part of comedy for many years. This article examines how criticism jokes are used in comedy, from the perspective of constructive criticism to self-criticism. Learn the difference between sincere criticism jokes and sarcasm, and explore why humor is the best way to tackle the issue of criticism.
Quick Jump To
- Short Criticism Jokes
- Criticism One Liners
- Self Criticism Jokes
- Constructive Criticism Jokes
- More Criticism Jokes
Funniest Criticism Short Jokes
Short criticism jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The criticism humour may include short criticize jokes also.
- I brought my girlfriend home to meet my family. They criticized everything she did, mocked her heritage and gave her a psychiatric disorder.
I guess I shouldn't have insisted on the royal treatment. - Well, you won't get called a racist for criticizing the President anymore... ...you'll just get called a racist for supporting him.
- Have you guys heard about the new restaurant on the moon? Early critics say the food is good, but there's no atmosphere.
- Dr: "Mr Smith, your wife is comfortable." Husband: "I thought she was in a coma and critical condition."
Dr: "She is, the nurses are using her as a beanbag." - Doctor: "Your wife is in hospital!"... Me: "...How is she?"
Doctor: "I'm afraid she's critical".
Me: "Oh, you get used to that...". - ARTIST: I'd like your opinion on my painting. CRITIC: It's worthless.
ARTIST: I know, but I'd like it anyway. - Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. Then you're already a mile away and you have their shoes.
- Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you do criticize them, you're a mile away and also have their shoes.
- Critics say botox is too expensive... ...but I spoke to fifty people who just paid for the treatment, and none of them looked surprised.
- As a feminist who's fairly critical of her own movement, this made me laugh: Q: How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: That's not funny.
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Criticism One Liners
Which criticism one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with criticism? I can suggest the ones about critical thinking and controversy.
- What did the food critic say after tasting the Body of Christ? Very savioury.
- Chuck Norris was shot today The bullet is in critical condition
- The r in Gary Oldman … Is the most critical letter in the history of Google searches.
- Stastistics are like bikinis. What they reveal is interesting; what they hide is critical
- A movie about janitors impressed critics. Later that year the movie swept the Oscars.
- Maglev train hits 310mph in Japan. Critics say it has barely left the ground.
- What did the food critic say after trying the Wookiee? That was a bit Chewie
- Why was the food critic fired? They didn't reference their sauces
- How do you express criticism of Israel in America? \[redacted\]
- What do you call a gathering of judgmental Catholics? Critical Mass.
- She criticized my apartment... ...so I knocked her flat.
- How much did the critic tip the waitor? two cents
- Everyone criticizes Putin's Russia... But look at Putin's America!
- What do you call a piece of old farm equipment that's always criticizing you? Detractor.
- What's the opposite of critical thinking? Critical theory.
Self Criticism Jokes
Here is a list of funny self criticism jokes and even better self criticism puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- She tells me I'm unbelievably self-critical. I really hate that part of myself.
- If I could change two hundred things about myself... Being self-critical would probably be one.
- What do you call a self-righteous hippo? Hippo-critical
Constructive Criticism Jokes
Here is a list of funny constructive criticism jokes and even better constructive criticism puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My boss came over today to tell me how I built my house wrong. I'm not good with taking constructive criticism.
- What do you call someone who writes reviews on construction businesses? A constructive critic.
- How do you improve a building? Constructive criticism! Sorry, not sorry!
- Can you take constructive criticism well? No, no you cannot.
- How do frogs become toads? h**....
Amusing Criticism Jokes to Make You Laugh with Friends
What funny jokes about criticism you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean commentary jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make criticism pranks.
A young artist exhibits his work for the first time...
.. and a well known art critic is in attendance.
The critic says to the young artist, "would you like my opinion on your work?"
"Yes, " says the artist.
"It's worthless," says the critic
The artist replies, "I know, but tell me anyway."
I found my son hanging from a rope in his bedroom.
On the floor was a note saying, "I can't stand the critism anymore."
I quickly cut him down, gave him CPR and he started to breathe.
As he lay in my arms I saw his eyes slowly open and I said, "That's not how you spell criticism."
A man is drinking in a bar when a nun harasses him about drinking.
In self-defense the man says, Who told you that drinking is bad?
Nun : "Mother Superior told me."
Man : "So, have you ever tried it?"
Nun : "No, I haven't ever taken a drink of hard liquor."
Man : "Well, don't criticize me if you haven't tried it. I'll tell you what if you try it and don't like it, I'll give up drinking for life."
Nun : "Okay but bring it in a tea cup. I don't want people thinking I'm drinking."
The man goes up to the bartender and says, Bring me a couple of shots of v**... but bring one of them in a tea cup.
The bartender looked at the man and said, Is that nun in here again?
A struggling artist gets his first painting in to an art gallery
A struggling artist gets his first painting in to an art gallery. An art critic approaches him:
-Would you like to hear my professional opinion on your painting?
-Sure.
-It's pretty much worthless.
-I don't mind, you can tell me anyway.
All these people are so quick to criticize Melania Trump for wanting to take on cyber bullying when that's something her husband has a problem with
But no one criticized Laura Bush for wanting to teach kids how to read
The pessimist only sees darkness into the tunnel...
The optimist sees the light at the end of the tunnel
The realist sees a light approaching into the tunnel
The train driver sees 3 arseholes walking over the railway
My buddy tells me he doesn't take criticism too well.
I told him he should really work on that.
Trump, walking and arguing with a critic, stops a random person in the street to ask their opinion on the matter at hand.
Trump: Sir, maybe you can settle something for us; what do YOU think of how I performed as president of the United States?
Random Guy: Monumental
Trump: Thank you sir, you've been very helpful!
(To the Critic) See?! What did I tell you?
Critic: uhhhhh...that guy was Jamaican.
Rita found her husband hanging in his bedroom one morning with a note on his bed reading I can't take the critism anymore.
She quickly cut the rope, brought him down and managed to revive him.
As her husband lay in her arms and slowly opened his eyes, she said emotionally my dear…that's NOT how you spell criticism!
99 critical bugs in the code... 99 critical bugs. Track one down, patch it when found...
100 critical bugs in the code.
Movies are too violent
A lot of Critics have been saying that movies now days are way too violent.
To test this theory I took a nine year old boy to go see Gladiator, and he cried the whole movie.
Now it may be because he didn't know who I was.
Always helpful...
Before I criticize a man, I walk a mile in his shoes. That way, if he gets angry, he's a mile away and barefoot.
A critic goes to an art gallery and finds the artist of the pieces there.
Critic: "Would you like to know what I think of your art?"
Artist: "Oh, yes please"
Critic: "It's useless"
Artist: "I know, but I would still like to hear it. "
Voltaire said To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize.
It's time we rise up against those kids with leukemia
Inner Peace
If you can start the day without caffeine,
If you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,
If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles,
If you can eat the same food every day and be grateful for it,
If you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any time,
If you can take criticism and blame without resentment,
If you can conquer tension without medical help,
If you can relax without alcohol,
If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,
Then You Are Probably The Family Dog!
And you thought I was going to get all spiritual ...
