The Best 43 Critic Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Critic jokes. There are some critic filmmaker jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these critic impersonations puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Critic Jokes and Puns

A young artist exhibits his work for the first time...

.. and a well known art critic is in attendance.

The critic says to the young artist, "would you like my opinion on your work?"

"Yes, " says the artist.

"It's worthless," says the critic

The artist replies, "I know, but tell me anyway."

Why is everyone criticising EA?

I've only ever known EA as an excellent video game company and pioneer of the early home computer games industry. EA has always had my enjoyment as their primary concern and their community involvement is phenomenal.

($50 has been deposited into your Paypal account, remember to delete this part of the message before posting it).

Why did the movie critic give the movie he received on a burned disc a 3.14/5?

Because it was pi-rated.

Why did the wine critic get kicked off the nudist beach?

Because he was wandering around with a semillon.

(best when read out loud)

jokes about critic

How much did the critic tip the waitor?

two cents


ARTIST: I'd like your opinion on my painting.

CRITIC: It's worthless.

ARTIST: I know, but I'd like it anyway.

What did the music critic say about the Russian opera?

"Godunov."

Critic joke, What did the music critic say about the Russian opera?

Critics say Botox is too expensive...

...but I spoke to fifty people who just paid for the treatment, and none of them looked surprised.

Before criticising anyone, walk a mile in their shoes

because when you do you are a mile away and have their shoes..

Why did the film critic protest the new children's cemetery?

He's not a fan of juvenile plots.

What happened to the muslim critic?

He blew everything out of proportion!

You can explore critic commentator reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean critic benefactor dad jokes. There are also critic puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


So what do you do for a living? Im in organ trafficking. Fu** ! Dont you have a heart?

Was that a critic or an order?

When you criticize a person, walk a mile in his shoes...

then you'll be a mile away and in his shoes.

A critic goes to an art gallery and finds the artist of the pieces there.

Critic: "Would you like to know what I think of your art?"
Artist: "Oh, yes please"
Critic: "It's useless"
Artist: "I know, but I would still like to hear it. "

Before you criticise a person try walking a mile in their shoes.

Then, when you criticise that person again, you'll be a mile away AND have their shoes.

The pessimist only sees darkness into the tunnel...

The optimist sees the light at the end of the tunnel

The realist sees a light approaching into the tunnel

The train driver sees 3 arseholes walking over the railway

Critic joke, The pessimist only sees darkness into the tunnel...

A struggling artist gets his first painting in to an art gallery

A struggling artist gets his first painting in to an art gallery. An art critic approaches him:

-Would you like to hear my professional opinion on your painting?

-Sure.

-It's pretty much worthless.

-I don't mind, you can tell me anyway.

Before you criticize a gunman you should walk a mile in his shoes.

That way you'll be out of range and he'll be barefoot.

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes.

That way when you do criticize them, you're a mile away and also have their shoes.


A food critic was a farm-to-table restaurant

He flagged down the waiter and asked him how they prepared their chicken.
The waiter replied, "Nothing special. We just tell 'em they're gonna die."

What did the food critic say after trying the Wookiee?

That was a bit Chewie

Why is everyone criticising Aji Pai?

I've only ever known Aji Pai as an American attorney as the Chairman of United States FCC who makes the best decisions. Aji Pai has always had my enjoyment as their primary concern and their community involvement is phenomenal.

($50 has been deposited into your Paypal account, remember to delete this part of the message before posting it).

Everyone criticizes Putin's Russia...

But look at Putin's America!

What do you call a sheep with no parents who is a harsh critic?

A lamb-bastard.

What do the critically acclaimed Schindler's List and the famous children's movie Chicken Run have in common?

The tagline Escape or die frying .

What did the critics say about Stallone's superhero movie?

It was DREDDful.

Critic joke, What did the critics say about Stallone's superhero movie?

Critics are comparing Aquaman to Black Panther

At first glance, the movies do appear similar. They both feature ancient sci-fi utopias hidden from the rest of the world. In each movie, theres a fight for the throne in order to stop a war. However, they are ignoring one major difference: the characters in Aquaman can swim.

What the food critic say after eating Shrek?

"He was just meaty ogre"

What do you call someone who writes reviews on construction businesses?

A constructive critic.


If you do MDMA you should seriously consider a career as a movie critic.

They're always raving.

The restaurant critic wrote that the appetizer was unexceptional

It was par for the course

A critic reads what the local newspapers say about him

The papers say that everything he says seems to contradict itself. Baffled and deeply offended by this, the critic loudly proclaimed:

"My rage is indescribable!"

An artist takes his work to a gallery for the first time.

A well-known art critic happens to be there and spots the painting. He walks over to the young artist.

"Excuse me, would you like my opinion of your painting?"

"Sure," replied the artist.

"Frankly, it's completely worthless."

"I know, but tell it to me anyway."

A critical care doc, an ICU nurse and a field epidemiologist walk into a bar,

Just kidding, no they don't.

goddamnit


The art critic

A young painter is exhibiting his work for the first time, and a famous art critic is in attendance.

The critic has a look around and then finds the artist, saying to him: "Do you want my opinion on your art?"

The artist of course says "yes"

The critic replies "it's worthless"

"I know. But tell me anyway."

She criticized my apartment...

...so I knocked her flat.

Why was the food critic fired?

They didn't reference their sauces

99 critical bugs in the code... 99 critical bugs. Track one down, patch it when found...

100 critical bugs in the code.

Before you criticize a person, walk a mile in his shoes

And then when you do criticize that person, you'll be a mile away and have his shoes.

Never criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes.

That way, when you criticize them, you'll be a mile away, and you'll have their shoes.

What do you get when you cross a mafioso with a postmodern literary critic?

You get a guy who'll make you an offer you can't understand!

Trump, walking and arguing with a critic, stops a random person in the street to ask their opinion on the matter at hand.

Trump: Sir, maybe you can settle something for us; what do YOU think of how I performed as president of the United States?

Random Guy: Monumental

Trump: Thank you sir, you've been very helpful!

(To the Critic) See?! What did I tell you?

Critic: uhhhhh...that guy was Jamaican.

What is the difference between a critic and a puppy?

With time, training and patience, it is possible to make a puppy stop whining.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the critic khans puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working critic arnie piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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