Crispy Jokes

Following is our collection of fried puns and juicy one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Crispy jokes for adults, dirty tempura jokes and clean crust dad gags for kids.

The Best Crispy Puns

What's the difference between Kim jong un and dominoes ?

Dominoes can deliver a crispy Hawaiian in less than 30 minutes

The Bacon tree

Two Mexican brothers are lost in the desert.
They're hungry and thirsty, and have been walking for miles on end.
Suddenly, Jose yells at his brother. "Brother! Do you smell that? It smells like bacon!"
He rushes ahead, and sure enough, over the next dune, he sees it. A bacon tree. Glorious strips of crispy bacon, glistening in the sun, waiting to be eaten.
Jose runs head long at the tree, just as his brother climbs the dune behind him. Suddenly two machine guns pop out of the bacon tree and cut him down!
He turns to his brother, and with his last breath he yells out
"Brother! Is not a Bacon Tree!"
"Is..."
"Is a..."
"Is a Hambush..."

Two mexicans are stranded in the desert for days....

... and they're at death's door....

They stumble on, hoping for salvation in the form of an oasis or something, they suddenly spy through the heat haze a tree off in the distance.

As they get closer, they can see that the tree is draped with strip after strip of bacon. There's smoked bacon, crispy bacon, life-giving juicy nearly- raw bacon, all sorts.

"Hey, Pepe" says the first hombre. "ees a bacon tree!!! We're saved!!!"

"You're right, amigo!" says Pepe.

So Pepe goes on ahead and runs up to the tree salivating at the prospect of food. But as he gets to within five feet of the tree there's the sound of machine gun fire, and he is shot down in a hail of bullets.

His friend quickly drops down on the sand, and calls across to the dying Pepe. "Pepe!! Pepe!! Que pasa hombre?"

With his dying breath Pepe calls out.... "Ugh, run,amigo, run!! ees not a Bacon Tree".......

"ees... a.... Hambush"

I'm not old. I woke up, I lifted my arms, I moved my knees, I turned my neck. Everything made the same noise: Crrrrrraaaaaaccccckkkk!

So I've come to the conclusion that I'm not old, I'm crispy!

What's the difference between an old crab and a Korean in the oven?

Ones a crusty crestacean and the others a crispy crust Asian


What do you call a citizen of Hiroshima?

A rice crispy

What to you call a rice crispy treat with a musical career and multiple sexual assault cases?

A wrapped cereal serial rapist rapper.

'Cracker' is racist.

They should be called Crispy Baked Squares.

Why haven't they cremated Colonel Sanders yet?

They haven't decided on regular or extra crispy.

What's black and crispy, and hangs from a chandelier?

An amateur electrician

What do you call a Japanese burn victim

A rice crispy


If your joints pop, snap, and crack when you move your not old...

Your just crispy. 😉

What is Thanos's favorite cereal?

Rice Crispy Treats.

There is an abundance of pasty jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 13 funniest jokes and crispy puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any biscuits witze you can hear about crispy.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes