Creepy Jokes
88 creepy jokes and hilarious creepy puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about creepy that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Are you looking for the perfect way to surprise your friends and family this Halloween? Look no further! This article has a variety of creepy jokes that are sure to make everyone laugh, from creepy clowns and dolls to freaky old men and creepy crawly critters. Get ready for some unforgettable laughs with these awesome and Uncanny jokes!
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Funniest Creepy Short Jokes
Short creepy jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The creepy humour may include short scary jokes also.
- If I'm reading their lips correctly, my neighbors are arguing about some creepy guy next door.
- I used to love building sandcastles with my grandma But my parent's eventually found it creepy and glued the urn shut
- A guy and a girl are walking through the woods when the girl says, boy, these woods sure are creepy!! The guy replies.. tell me about it, I gotta walk out of here alone!
- Given infinite time, a million monkeys with a million typewriters will eventually become a very creepy room filled with an equal count of typewriters and monkey skeletons
- I walked into a Victoria's Secret a man and came out a knight. From this day forward I shall be known as Sir- please leave you're being creepy.
- I find it creepy when my wife gives me those sad puppy dog eyes It makes me wonder what she did the rest of the dog.
- If I'm good at lip reading correctly... Then my neighbours are calling the police about some creepy guy staring at them through the window next door.
- I was seeing this h**... about twice a week. But last week she saw me and closes her blinds now.
- My gf said she was being spyed on by a creepy guy she dont know I've started choosing better hiding spots.
- I've been training my dog to alert me when he smells people who follow a creepy pseudo-religious leader who makes them believe that their salvation lies in giving him money. It's sniffacult work.
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Creepy One Liners
Which creepy one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with creepy? I can suggest the ones about weird and spooky.
- There's iPod, iMac, iPhone... and Apple watch, because iWatch sounds way too creepy.
- They were going to make an iWatch for kids but iWatch Kids sounds a bit creepy.
- Why did the creepy hipster get arrested? because he was following people before instagram
- If Bill Cosby is America's dad... Does that make him Canada's creepy uncle?
- My dog has a creepy obsession with trees All he ever does is talk about their skin
- Why are forests so creepy? Because the trees are all shady.
- Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven is a super creepy movie.
- How do creepy songwriters get paid? Per verse
- Why was the haunted mansion self conscious? Because it got a lot of creepy stairs.
FML. - What do you call spooky Italian music? Creepy pasta.
- Geraldine went on a blind date with a really creepy guy It was intimiDating
- You know what's scary? That creepy psycho killer behind you
- We all have the creepy friend If your group doesn't seem to have one, its you
- If you ever see a creepy clown... Go for the juggler
- What does a creepy pokemon do while you're in the shower? Pikachu
Creepy Clown Jokes
Here is a list of funny creepy clown jokes and even better creepy clown puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why are we seeing the creepy clowns all over the country? Being in many states and seen on all types of media is how they run for president.
Creepy Uncle Jokes
Here is a list of funny creepy uncle jokes and even better creepy uncle puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My creepy uncle constantly watches me, and he keeps telling me what I can and can't do. His name is Sam.
- Did you hear about the Transformers creepy uncle? Gropetemis Prime.
Creepy Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about creepy you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean nasty jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make creepy pranks.
A woman is walking through the woods at night with a serial killer.
She says to her companion, "Man, this forest is really creepy at night. I wish we weren't out here."
He replies, "You think you have it bad? I have to walk home alone!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two men in a park.
A creepy guy walks up to another man in a park.
Creepy guy leans close to the man and whispers "do you have any n**... photos of your wife?"
The man angrily says "certainly not".
Creepy guy says "would you like to buy some?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Joke from Les Bonnes Femmes
Man: Whats the difference between a frying pan and a chamber p**...?
Woman: I don't know
Man: Then I would hate to eat your place!
Man laughs uncontrollably in a creepy way, perhaps foreshadowing the upcoming r**... scene.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So it's perfectly acceptable to dress up as a s**... cat on Halloween...
...but do it any other time of the year and suddenly you're that creepy guy at church?
viscoelasticity is a bit creepy
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a disabled p**...?
A creepy crawler
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Double standards are not fair!
When miley cirus gets n**... and licks hammers its beautiful and artistic, but when I do it its weird, creepy and I get a life time ban from Ikea.
I have such bad luck getting a girl to come over...
I watched the video from "The Ring" and the creepy chick called seven days later and said something came up and she couldn't make it.
Variants for running.
Variants for running:-
1. Hot girl in front of you.
2. Creepy guy behind you.
(If 1 applies to you, you're probably 2)
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call your creepy Jewish neighbor?
Diddler on the roof.
FUN AT THE PARK
Ordinarily, staring is creepy. But if you spread your attention across many individuals, then it's just people watching.
What is it about tall creepy louisiana swamp dwellers that makes them naturally glow?
Their bayou loomin' essence
Were you on Baywatch?
Cause I've been watching you... bae..
More of a creepy line.
Why is Santa so creepy?
He's always stocking you.
If you play a Coldplay song backwards, you'll hear a lot of creepy, Satanic chanting in Latin
But if you play a coldplay song the normal way, you'll hear something much worse. A Coldplay song.
She said yes !
even though I only asked her if I wasn't too creepy for her
One time, the parents went out to dinner.
The sitter called and asked if she could cover the creepy clown statue in the kid's room.
The dad said: "Get out of the house. Call the police. We don't have a clown statue!"
By the time police arrived the scene, they found they did have a clown statue and the dad had alzheimer's.
I was stalked for hours by a creepy dude who kept following me everywhere and drawing pictures of me
He was really sketching me out.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Mary walked into HR
Mary: I need to file a s**... harassment against Jim.
HR: why what did he do?
M: on Monday he walked up behind me in the kitchen and sniffed my hair. Saying I smelled good.
On Tuesday he did it again but that time he got closer.
And then today he dug his nose into my hair for at lease 10 seconds and said I smell sooo good
HR: well that is creepy, but that is really not him s**... harassment. Just invading person space.
M: you know Jim is a midget right!
HR: ohhhhhh
I was talking to my creepy coworker
I told him "I like my women like I like my coffee, strong and sweet." He said "Hmm. I like mine like I like my salad." "Well dressed?" I asked him.
"No. Chopped."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a creepy old guy who hangs out at malls, and has s**... with under age teens?
In Alabama, your Honor, but soon it will be "Senator".
What do witches eat?
Creepy pasta
What do creepy men and spiders have in common?
They both have sticky hands after being on the web for awhile.
Haunted castle
A young American tourist went on a guided tour of a creepy old castle in England. "How did you enjoy it?" The guide asked when it was over.
"It was great," the tourist replied, "but I was afraid I was going to see a ghost in some of those dark passageways."
"No need to worry," said the guide "I've never seen a ghost in all the time I've been here."
"How long is that?" the tourist asked.
"Oh, about 300 years."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
what do you call a creepy therapist ?
the r**...
I worked in one of those creepy ice cream vans over memorial day weekend, and I must say, they really do work. I raked in the Benjamins.
Also got a couple Jacobs and Timothys as well.
I can't stand it when people don't say what they mean. For example, some people call me "creepy." When what they are trying to say is, "You are ugly and awkward."
I told my girlfriend to stop pretending to be 13 because it's creepy and pointless
She'll be thirteen next month anyways
Did you hear the urban legend about the creepy ghost that appears when you use artificial sweetener?
He's called Splendaman.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call it when an incel threatens to kill himself when someone doesn't respond to his desperate and creepy messages?
Fake noose.
What's the difference between French people and their breakfasts?
One's creepy and the other is a crepe.
What do Santa and my creepy neighbor Chad have in common?
They both see me when I'm sleeping
What do you call a creepy manipulative group's place where boys pee out in the open?
Cultural.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
"b**...".
Because "almost underage" sounds a bit creepy.
Dance like no one's watching!
Just be careful of the creepy guy in the corner with the video camera who hasn't moved all night who wants the make you famous on YouTube.
I left a present for my crush today, and she had me arrested!
When her cat does it, it's adorable, but apparently it's "creepy" when I leave a dead bird on her doorstep.
Resurrecting my laptop from sleep mode.
Are you gonna turn on for me?
Also me: Dude that's creepy.
Want to know another creepy coincidence?
Jack the Ripper, Vlad the Impaler, and Winnie the Pooh all share the same middle name. Stay safe, my friends!
I was driving with my dad when we passed a cemetery. My dad goes in a low, dark, creepy voice, "I know something about this cemetery that you don't. And I was like what is it? He continued, "The people living in this town can't be buried here. I was really confused so I asked why?
He rasped, "Cuz they're still alive!"
A dark turn
Two criminals are taking a walk deep in the woods one dark night.
Boy, it sure is creepy out here, says the first outlaw.
How do you think I feel? asks his companion. I have to walk back alone.
I like creepypasta.
My favorite flavor is Fettuccine Afraido.
Elsa was complaining to her friend about a boy from their class.
He's pretty creepy. He knows so many dirty songs! , she said.
And he sings them around you? , her friend asked.
No, but he whistles them.
