The Best 58 Create Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Create jokes. There are some create devise jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these create induce puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Create Jokes and Puns

Without anyone's help, I created mints that each weigh 1/16 of a pound...

I make my own announcemints now.

Jesus likes to drink wine.

As we all know, Jesus liked to drink wine. One day, however, he got tired of wine. He said unto John and Thomas, "Go, and fetch me some ingredients so that I may create another kind of drink." And so they went to the market, and John asked Thomas "So, what should we get Him?" Thomas responds, "The rice, for Christ's sake."

An artist is commissioned to create a painting to celebrate Soviet-Polish relations...

to be entitled 'Lenin in Poland'.
Around a month later the artist unveils his painting to a crowd of Soviet dignitaries, and it is greeted by gasps of disgust
The painting depicts Lenin's wife in bed with Leonid Trotsky
One of the assembled guests asks 'But where is Lenin?'
To which the artist replied, 'Lenin's in Poland'

Create joke, An artist is commissioned to create a painting to celebrate Soviet-Polish relations...

Moses, Jesus and Mohammed were selecting their followers...

Moses looks at all the women from whom to create his chosen people, picks out all of the smart ones and tells them to follow him. Jesus' turn comes, he looks at the remaining group, picks all of the most beautiful ones and tells them to follow him. Mohammed takes a look at the remaining group, sighs and says "cover yourself up"

Not the best joke, but i did make it up myself.

Q: Why can you not hook two CD-ROM drives together to create a CD Writer?

A: Because two ROMs don't make a Write.


Why should you never let a panda into a chemistry lab?

Because it will create pandamonium

Why is your mother like the universe?

They both create gravity waves when they bang.

Create joke, Why is your mother like the universe?

I created a new word today.

Plagiarism.

CREATE PASSWORD -

"123Bob".

Password must contain no names, be complex and have over 50 characters.

"GameOfThrones"

Password accepted.

A New Movie - Stephen Spielberg

Stephen Speilberg has just recently decided to create a new action movie about the greatest composers on Earth. His creates his cast and asks them 'Who do you want to be' ...

Bruce Willis says to him 'I ll play Beethoven, i've always fancied myself as a bit of a genius'

Liam Neeson then pipes up saying 'Im going to be Mozart, i find his music very relaxing and very baroque'

Lastly Arnold Schwarzenegger says 'Ill be Bach'

Who created the first diswasher?

God, and her name was Eve.

You can explore create develop reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean create build dad jokes. There are also create puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Why did God create Adam before he created Eve?

So no one would tell him how to make Adam.

Why did God create man first?

To give him a chance to speak...

is it crazy how saying sentences backwards . . .

. . .create backwards sentences saying how crazy it is?

As a Marxist I could never play CoD,

because I refuse to create a class.

So God creates Adam...

...and soon after he notices that Adam is lonely.

God says "Do not fear, my child. For I will create a partner to accompany you and man from this time forth. She will be known, as a woman."

God continues "She will be obedient, loyal, passionate and nurturing."

Adam hesitates..

"What is this gonna cost me?" Adam asks.

God responds "An arm and a leg."

Adam retorts "What can I get for a rib?"

Create joke, So God creates Adam...

The workers at the inn aren't very friendly...

they create a hostel environment.

About 4,000 years ago:

God: I shall create a great plague and every living thing on Earth will die!

Fish: *Winks at God and slips him a $20 note*

God: Correction, I shall create a great flood!

I created an Erectile Dysfunction support group once,

But it flopped,
Nobody came


How to make a charity

1. find someone in need
2. Create an organization and donate all revenue to said someone
3. ???
4. nonprofit

How do you create a hipster?

Give a homeless guy an iPhone.

What do Magic Johnson, Charlie Sheen and roughly 250,000 children in Africa have in common?

A continuing chance to create a better tomorrow.

You **sick** bastards.

What do new iPhones and Donald Trump have in common?

Both cost more than they're worth and create the illusion of superiority without ever delivering.

A Catholic Priest told this joke at a Wedding.

Adam woke up in the Garden of Eden. After a while of wandering around he became sad. God came to him and asked "Adam, why are you sad? I have created this amazing garden for you." Adam replies, "Why does every other being have mate and I do not?" God replies " Very well I will create for you a perfect mate. But it will cost you an arm and a leg." Adam thinks for a bit and then replies "What can I get for a rib?"

So, little jonny came back from the church...

and asked his mom: "Mom, is god man or a woman".

Mom didn't want to spoil his mind so she said: "Both."

Little jonny went to his room and thought for sometime.

He came back and asked her: "Mom, is god black or white".

Again, the mom didn't want any controversy so she said: "Both."

Jonny again went back to his room and thought for sometime.

Then he came back and asked: "Mom, is god a straight or gay?"

Again, mom didn't want to create any controversy, so again she said: "Both."

This time jonny went to his room and thought really hard.

He came back and said: "Mom I finally figured it out. michael jackson is god"

If you hear a supernatural voice in your head telling you to destroy statues of the Ten Commandments, you might be mentally ill.

But if the voice tells you to create them instead, you might be Moses.

An old Soviet joke..

An artist is commissioned to create a painting celebrating Soviet–Polish friendship, to be called "Lenin in Poland." When the painting is unveiled at the Kremlin, there is a gasp from the invited guests; the painting depicts Nadezhda Krupskaya (Lenin's wife) naked in bed with Leon Trotsky. One guest asks, "But this is a travesty! Where is Lenin?" To which the painter replies, "Lenin is in Poland."

Barbies create unrealistic expectations of women

No woman's head reattaches THAT easily in my experience

Did you hear about the baby boy born without eyelids?

Fortunately, doctors were able to use his foreskin to create functional eyelids. While an overall success, the surgery did leave him a little cock-eyed.

McDonald's tried to create a beef version of the McRib, but failed.

Hopefully, they learned from their McSteaks.

Antivaxxers should create social media accounts for their children

They'll go viral in no time.

Why did Zuckerberg create Facebook?

He couldn't pass the captcha for Myspace.

During the annual cavemen conference ...

Greg : so I kept rubbing this rock against another rock until it became very thin and now I can cut vegetables,meat using this . I call this "The Knife" .

Chief Gogo : wow , I thought no-one can beat Gorg's invention of using wheat flour and water to create a new food called "bread" but yours is a worthy contender

Greg " that's not it ,chief "

And then places a piece of bread on the stone and takes the knife in his hand

" What I'm about to do will blow your mind " .

One day I'll create a cure for blindness

You'll see.

A man exclaims, "I would die to fulfill my quest.. to create the perfect grain blend. I would make..

..the ultimate sack of rice."

Why did God create Adam before Eve?

He didn't want any advice on how to do it

I created a new word.

I call it, "Plaigiarism"

I believe that it is time for all the world's countries to come together and create one universal currency

I mean it's just common cents

I've created a writing software to rival Microsoft.

It's their Word against mine.

I created a fetish exercise program, but I don't know how to end it.

We are still working out the kinks.

I created a wormhole, but it doesn't work.

Now it's just something to a-void.

Why it's impossible for skeletons to create a Choir

They don't have the organs.

My dad said It was Daniel Gabriel Fahrenheit and Anders Celsius to create the terms used for thermometer scales

I replied: Don't you think it's egocentric to name everything after yourself?
He said: well, to be fair they both worked hard for their degrees!

LG created a new proprietary Bluetooth technology and protestors are now rallying against the the IEEE 802.15.1 Bluetooth standard

Manufacturers have quickly adopted to LG's new protocol, as they are afraid of not supporting the LGBT.

After God created Adam, Adam came to God and said, You created all the animals and each one has a mate, but I'm alone. Can you create me one also?

God replied, Well Adam, I can create a mate for you. It will be the crown of my creation, someone who will serve you, and your every need and desire. The most beautiful and loving creature. She will take care of you always , and give you all the respect that is deserving of you. The only thing is, it will cost you an arm and a leg.

Adam thought for a second and said, What do you got for a rib?

God was handing out talents one morning

To some, He gave the power to create life. The angels around Him were in awe as crops flourished and population soared. To others, he gave fine skills and artistry. His angelic entourage marveled at intricate needlework, tapestry, and sculpture.

God stooped down low and found a man waiting in the darkness, just before dawn. He gave him the power to sprinkle water on the grass as the sun rose. The angels were confused. "You gave amazing abilities to all others. Can this one really care for himself with such a small talent?"

God simply replied, "He will learn to make dew."

A lettuce farm was busted by the FDA on suspicion of combining plant and human DNA to create a new protein hybrid.

When they dug up the grounds the found human romaines.

A man lost at sea is found on an island 20 years later.

The sailors that find him are surprised to see three large buildings on the island. They ask the man why he built the buildings. "This first building is my house" he says. "I was able to set up a crude aqueduct to create some form of indoor plumbing". The sailors are impressed and ask about the second building. "This second building is my church" he says "I am a Christian and my faith is very important to me". The sailors nod in understanding and ask about the third building. "Oh, that one" the man says. "That's the church I USED to go to".

I created a poll to see if people preferred pillows stuffed with bird feathers or pillows stuffed with synthetic material.

Synthetic material didn't win. Too many down votes.

A good speech should be like a woman's skirt;

long enough to cover the subject and short enough to create interest.

Why do vampires never create new businesses?

They're afraid of the stakeholders

(A joke I just made up)

What do you call it when you create a copy of your enemy's toe?

Foe Toe Synthesis

What do you call a scientist who splits atoms to create bubbly beverages?

A nuclear fizzicist.

A year ago,I tried to network around and create a group of guys with similar taste and do activities together.

For some reason, the prosecuting lawyer and media keep mentioning it as a ring.

What is created when you mix Human DNA and Whale DNA

Your mom

In the 1970s, as manager of Baskin Robbins', my mom was tasked to create new flavors related to Richard Nixon...

Her choices, as she told me, were 'ImPeachments & Cream' and 'Watermelon-Gate' (as a sorbet).



Both were denied.

This is actually true.

Every new McDonald's creates 40 new jobs.

20 dentists and 20 heart surgeons.

The Teacher instructed her class to create a sentence with the words; defense, defeat and detail.

Little Lisa, who was normally a very quiet and reclusive child immediately jumped and waved her hand excitedly. Thinking a breakthrough was imminent, she picked Lisa first. Lisa recited; The cat jumped over defense. Defeat went first, detail went last.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the create invent jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working create excel piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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