Crazy Jokes

153 crazy jokes and hilarious crazy puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about crazy that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Tired of hearing the same old jokes? Get ready to hear something totally different with these crazy jokes! These joke are sure to make you laugh and may even have you scratching your head trying to figure out if it was meant to be funny or crazy! With a mix of madman, mad, and even some sane jokes, you're sure to find something that's unique and funny.

Best Short Crazy Jokes

Short crazy jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The crazy humour may include short insane jokes also.

  1. I, for one, support these crazy killers dressing up like clowns. It was a lot harder to see them coming when they were dressing like cops.
  2. What's four inches long, two inches wide, and drives women crazy? An empty toilet paper roll.
  3. That rabbi's gone crazy! He's been running around a circumcising all kinds of lettuce... and that's just the tip of the iceberg.
  4. Called my wife on her cell to warn her about this crazy driver on the news who's speeding down the highway in the wrong direction. She replied: I know! There's like hundreds of them!
  5. My therapist said I could book 10 sessions in advance for £6000 She must think I'm crazy!!
  6. It's crazy how sexist the postal service is. I guess that's natural with such a mail dominated industry.
  7. I used to hang out with a guy who crossbred insects... But I got sick of his crazy ant ticks.
  8. What's the difference between a cult and a religion? In a cult, there's always at least one person at the top who's completely crazy, or who knows it's all a scam...
    In a religion, that guy's dead!
  9. is it crazy how saying sentences backwards . . . . . .create backwards sentences saying how crazy it is?
  10. Grandma yells across the room: "Billy, what's the name of that german guy who drives me crazy?" "It's Alzheimer, grandma".

Quick Jump To

Crazy joke, Grandma yells across the room: "Billy, what's the name of that german guy who drives me crazy?"

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about crazy can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of crazy puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Crazy One Liners

Which crazy one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with crazy? I can suggest the ones about strange and craziest.

  1. Crazy ex-girlfriends are like a box of chocolate They'll kill your dog
  2. I had this crazy dream where I was virtually weightless I was like 0mg
  3. There's something crazy I really want to try in bed.. Getting 8 hours of sleep
  4. What kind of trails does a crazy person travel? Psychopaths. (I hate myself)
  5. How does a crazy person walk through the forest? He takes the psychopath.
  6. A crazy ex is like a box of chocolates If you're not careful, they'll kill your dog.
  7. Whats 6 inches long, 2 inches wide, and drives women crazy? A $100 dollar bill.
  8. People say horse girls are crazy… …but I've always found them rather stable.
  9. Some people say I am crazy Lucky for me, only I can hear them
  10. My roommate thinks i'm crazy Jokes on him i don't have a roommate.
  11. Hey I just met you, And this is crazy,
    I have Alzheimer's,
    Hey I just met you.
  12. A chemist froze himself at-273C Everyone said he was crazy. But he was 0K
  13. Man I really hate calculus. It just derives me crazy
  14. A chemist froze himself at -273.15°C. Everyone said he was crazy.. ..But he was 0K
  15. How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the pyschopath

Crazy People Jokes

Here is a list of funny crazy people jokes and even better crazy people puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Did you hear about the party thief? I mean I've seen some crazy people at parties, but this guy definitely takes the cake.
  • Apparently people are getting paid now to mention products in their social media posts That's as crazy as the discounts at Dave's furniture Emporium.
  • I heard people are getting paid to mention companies and do product placement in their Reddit posts! That's almost as crazy as the discounts at Jez's Furniture Emporium. Sale this weekend
  • How did the crazy people find their way out of the woods? They followed the psycho path.
  • Easter this year is April Fools Day Just remember that so you don't fall for any crazy stories like people coming back from the dead.
  • How do crazy people get across the woods? They use the psycho-paths
  • People sometimes ask me if I'm crazy... But the voices in my head always tell me to say no.
  • People say I'm crazy, but I regularly see my therapist... It's a shame that she died years ago.
  • Did you know people are getting paid to mention products in their Facebook statuses? That's as crazy as the discounts at Dave's Furniture Emporium…
  • They say calling people crazy is like being racist now. All those people I bit at the mall ought to be ashamed of themselves.

Crazy Wife Jokes

Here is a list of funny crazy wife jokes and even better crazy wife puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • When my girlfriend says, "Unlock your phone. I need to check something." I just look at her crazy. I don't even let my wife do that.
  • My wife said it was "crazy and impossible" when I told her I wanted to make a car out of spaghetti... You should have seen her face as I drove pasta!
  • divorce Wife to husband: I want a divorce. You always tell me I am fat.
    Husband: Dont be crazy. What about our child ?
    Wife: What ? What child ?
    Husband: So you are not pregnant ??
  • I asked my wife what she wanted for Christmas. "Something that buzzes and is guaranteed to drive me crazy" she replied.
    So I bought her a pet mosquito.
  • If my wife thinks I'm obsessed with programming, she's crazy. Endif
  • My wife is on a tropical food diet and the house if full of the stuff... It's enough to make a mango crazy.
  • I don't mind that my wife thinks I'm crazy. I mind that I have to hear it from our dog.
  • My wife told me I was crazy for trying to fix our car using spaghetti. The look on her face when I drove pasta.
  • My wife thought I was crazy when I suggested a car made out of spaghetti You should've seen her face when I was driving pasta!
  • If you think your wife is crazy now... Wait until you divorce her.

Crazy Girl Jokes

Here is a list of funny crazy girl jokes and even better crazy girl puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Why do so many guys have crazy girlfriend stories but no girls have crazy boyfriend stories? Because all girls with crazy boyfriend stories are dead.
  • What do Italian girls drive? They drive a-me crazy
  • Girl: So, how many times a day do you shave? Man: Well, about 15-20 times every day.
    Girl: My god, are you some kind of crazy?
    Man: No, I'm a barber.
  • How does an Alabama girl know she's in for a crazy night? Her daddy says he wants her in bed by ten.
  • Next time I hit the club, I'm coloring myself head to toe with a permanent marker, and that's all I'll wear. Because every girl's crazy 'bout a Sharpie-dressed man.
  • Crazy girls are like a street vendor's kebab Hot, jucy, and dangerous.
  • Read an article where a girl plans on marrying a tree. That's so crazy but what if he leaves you.
  • People say I'm crazy because I don't enjoy spooning girls I much prefer knifing them.
  • Hey girl are you africa? Because Djibouti is making me crazy
  • A crazy girl just called me a stalker and then blocked me I don't know what her deal is but I'm about to ring her doorbell and find out

Crazy Love Jokes

Here is a list of funny crazy love jokes and even better crazy love puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Auto-correct is so crazy now a days... My mom meant to text me 'I love you' but it auto corrected to 'You're a disappointment.'
  • The song Jungle Love is stuck in my head. It's driving me mad.
    It's making me crazy.
  • What do you call a crazy marsupial that loves fights to the death? Mortal Wombat
  • I love my sisters kids, especially Denice. I'm also crazy about Denephew
  • What do you call a crazy person who loves money? A doughnut
  • Does anyone else love going into psychosis? idk theres just something about it that drives me crazy
  • My girlfriends 2 year old nephew loves trucks. His first word was truck. He points at every truck he sees and talks about trucks in his sleep. I guess you could day he's semi crazy
  • What do crazy cat ladies and car enthusiasts have in common? They love to listen to their babies purr.
  • All I'm saying is there's a reason all the best love songs have the word crazy in them...
Crazy joke

Comical & Quirky Crazy Jokes for a Roaring Good Time

What funny jokes about crazy you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean bizarre jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make crazy prank.

So there's this man with a parrot.

And his parrot swears like a sailor, I mean he's a p**.... He can swear for five minutes straight without repeating himself.
The trouble is that the guy who owns the parrot is a quiet, conservative type, and this bird's foul mouth is driving him crazy.
One day, it gets to be too much, so the guy grabs the bird by the t**..., shakes him really hard, and yells, "QUIT IT!" But this just makes the bird mad and he swears more than ever.
Then the guy gets mad and says, "That's it. I'll get you." and locks the bird in a kitchen cabinet.
This really aggravates the bird and he claws and scratches, and when the guy finally lets him out, the bird cuts loose with a stream of invective that would make a veteran sailor blush.
At that point, the guy is so mad that he throws the bird into the freezer.
For the first few seconds, there is a terrible din. The bird kicks and claws and thrashes. Then it suddenly goes very quiet.
At first the guy just waits, but then he starts to think that the bird may be hurt. After a couple of minutes of silence, he's so worried that he opens up the freezer door.
The bird calmly climbs onto the man's outstretched arm and says, "Awfully sorry about the trouble I gave you. I'll do my best to improve my vocabulary from now on."
The man is astounded. He can't understand the transformation that has come over the parrot.
Then the parrot says, "By the way, what did the chicken do?"

A n**... guy walks into a psychiatrist's office...

"You gotta help me, doc," he tells the psychiatrist, "I think I'm going crazy!"
The psychiatrist looks him over and replies. "Well, I can clearly see your nuts."

A Brazilian people killed.

One day a man is sitting next to a blond woman who is reading the newspaper.
She is visibly upset while reading a particular article. He can't help but look over and see what she's reading. He sees the headline
"s**... b**... kill two Brazilian men on bus".
He understands why she is upset now, so he strikes up a conversation with her.
She confesses "I have seen these before, but this is getting crazy. I mean, two Brazilian men killed? How many is in a Brazilian again?"

Husband comes home and says:

Husband comes home and says:
- Honey, I invited a friend to have dinner with us today.
Screaming she replies:
- What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I did not buy any groceries, the dishes are dirty and I'm not in the mood to cook anything special.
- I know.
- So why did you invited him?
- Because the poor guy is thinking about getting married.

My grandpa's favorite joke

A man runs into a psychiatrist's office exclaiming that he has gone crazy. The psychiatrist asks this random fellow why he thinks he is crazy, to which the man retorts, "I've been wearing cellophane underwear for the past week!" The psychiatrist, in slight disbelief, asks the man to prove it. The man swiftly pulls down his trousers to reveal that he was wearing home-made cellophane underwear. After a moment of examination, the psychiatrist exclaims, "I can clearly see you're nuts!"

Hey grandson, what's the name of that german man who makes me go crazy?

Alzheimer, grandma, Alzheimer...

Water p**...

When my three-year-old son opened the birthday gift from his grandmother, he discovered a water p**.... He squealed with delight and headed for the nearest sink.
I was not so pleased. I turned to Mom and said, ''I'm surprised at you. Don't you remember how we used to drive you crazy with water guns?''
Mom smiled and replied, ''Yes dear - I remember very well...''

That half man, half horse...

Did you hear about the half man, half horse causing a ruckus downtown last night? He was k**... over trash cans, yelling at people, just going crazy. The cops finally showed up, calmed him down, and asked "Why are you doing this?" Apparently he wanted to be the centaur of attention.

May I have a piece of gum?

Two gay guys are in a large passenger plane flying across the Pacific. In the middle of the flight, one turns and tells his partner: "Let's have s**.... Right here and now." His partner says: "Are you crazy? In front of all these people?" The first gay guy says: "Don't worry. They're all asleep. Here, see for yourself." He leans out into the aisle and yells: "Excuse me, can anybody let me have a piece of gum?" There's no answer or any kind of interest. His partner is convinced and they have s**... right then and there.
The plane lands and as the passengers are disembarking there is a stewardess by the exit asking everyone if they had a good flight. One man says, "The flight was fine but I have a horrible headache". The stewardess says: "Oh you poor thing, why didn't you ask for some aspirin?" And the man says: "Are you kidding? I saw what happened to that poor guy who asked for a piece of gum."

A wife is at home watching the news.

On the TV she sees footage of a crazy man driving the wrong way on the freeway. She realizes her husband takes the same path home from work. She immediately calls him and warns him of the danger. She says, "Be careful! There's a crazy man driving on the wrong side of the freeway!"
The husband replies, "One!? There's hundreds of them!"

Need a Break!

I urgently needed a few days off work, but, I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave. I thought that I would do something crazy. So I hung upside-down on the ceiling and made funny noises. My co-worker asked me what I was doing. I told him that I was pretending to be a light bulb so that the Boss might think I was 'Crazy' and give me a few days off.
A few minutes later the boss came into the office and asked, "What in the name of good GOD are you doing?"
I told him I was a light bulb.
He said, "You are clearly stressed out. Go home and recuperate for a couple of days."
I jumped down and walked out of the office....
When my co-worker followed me, the Boss asked him, "And where do you think you're going?"
He replied, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark!"

I tickled my little brothers foot this morning. And my mom went crazy about it.

Something about "Waiting until he's born".

they asked a 100year old grandpa why were all the women still crazy about him?

grandpa said nothing! just gently licked his eyebrow

A guy is standing in Times Square hitting two sticks together

A police man walks up to him, thinking he is crazy, and asks "what in the world are you doing?"
The man replies "I'm keeping the mountain lions away!"
The police man says "there's not a mountain lion within 1000 miles of here!"
The man grins "I know I'm doing a pretty good job, aren't I?"

Why did the crazy mexican c**... a train?

He had loco motives...
I'll show myself out

What is worse than blacking out after a crazy night and losing money?

Blacking out and gaining money.

A boy offers a girl $100 in exchange for s**...

"Sure, why not" replies the girl.
"And what about $10?" the boy asks.
"Are you crazy? What do you think I am?"
"I already know what you are, now we're just discussing the price."

Two kids camping in the backyard

Two kids are camping in their backyard, it's gotten pretty late and neither of them have watches.
"What time do you think it is?" One of them asks the other.
"Just make a ton of noise" says the other.
The first kid gets confused and decides to do it anyways. After a few seconds of screaming a light turn on in another yard and a neighbour yells "YOU CRAZY KIDS IT'S 2 IN THE MORNING!!"

A doctor checks on two roommates in an insane asylum...

He walks into their room to find one man hanging upside down from the ceiling fan by his feet. The other man sits below him, putting together wooden blocks.
The doctor asks, "How are you two doing?"
The man on the floor says, "Oh, I'm building a castle. Don't mind that guy up there, he's okay but a little crazy, thinks he's a lightbulb."
"Well, let's get him down before he hurts himself."
The sitting man stares back in shock. "And work in the *dark*?!"

Two factory workers are talking.

Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off."
The man replies, "And how would you do that?"
The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling.
The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?"
The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb."
The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off."
The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?"
The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."

A ship is sailing through the sea...

passing by a small island and watches a man screaming and shouting.
A passenger asks the captain:
- Who is he?
- We don't know, he gets crazy every year we pass here.

It's crazy how everyone sleeps differently.

I sleep on my side, my roommate sleeps on his back, and my ex sleeps with everyone.

Crazy man has s**... with machine at laundromat and evades police

Nut screws washer and bolts

A man is sued and goes to court...

A man is sued for calling a lady a cow during a heated exchange at work. The man is asked by the judge to pay a small fine to the madam which he does immediately. Just before leaving the courtroom, the man and the judge have the following conversation:
"Your honor, may I ask you a question?"
"By all means sir"
"If i were to call a cow a madam, would I still have to pay a fine?"
"Of course not, that's crazy"
"Thank you your honor"
The man then turns to the woman and says:
"Have a good day madam"
And proceeds to walk out of tthe courtroom
(My dad just told me this in Serbian and it sounded better but this sort of works. Hope you get some gags!)

Now that Donald Trump will be President, I really hope he builds the wall.

We need to keep all those crazy Americans contained.

Thought all these voices in my head meant I was crazy, but one of them is a therapist.

And he says I'm fine.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office wearing saran wrap pants.

Man: Doctor, I think I'm crazy.
Psychiatrist: Well I can clearly see your nuts.

- Doctor, I want to live very old

- Do you drink?
- Never, only water.
- You smoke?
- Oh no, my body is a temple
- Do you have crazy nights out dancing while doing c**... and coming back home to have unprotected s**... with multiple partners?
- Never, I'm single and abstinent.
- I see. So could you explain me exactly why you want to live old?

A man goes to Japan on business and hires a p**....

He doesn't speak any Japanese and she barely speaks any English. While they are going at it she yells out, "Gama Su! Gama Su!" Knowing that she has been satisfied he goes to bed.
The next day he plays golf and one of his associates gets a hole in one. Everyone goes crazy, so to enjoy in the excitement he yells, "Gama Su! Gama Su!"
Everybody goes silent and one of his Japanese associates says, "What do you mean wrong hole?"

There were two friends drinking and one says to the other

I have a trumpet that tells the hour.
"The hour?" the friend asks.
Yes, yes look.... he grabs the trumpet and opens the window and starts to play it like crazy when all of a sudden you can hear...
"You $#@% it's 3 in the morning"

I've decided to freeze myself down to -273.15 degrees Celsius.

My friends all think I'm crazy, but I'll be 0K.

I went to the psychiatrist, and he says "You're crazy".

I tell him I want a second opinion. He says, 'Okay, you're ugly too!"

They say that coconut water is good for hair.

Now, I understand why my p**... are growing like crazy recently.

Two crazy people are by the pool in an asylum...

One of them falls in, the other quickly jumps in and saves him.
The doctor later meets the saviour and says "we've assessed your situation and believe you're qualified to leave the asylum based on your rational deeds. However I regret to inform you that the man you saved hung himself in the same night".
The man smiles and confidently says "oh he didn't, I hung him to dry him up!"

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I told him I wanted another opinion..

He said fine, you're ugly too
-Rodney Dangerfield

3 friends are sharing one bed in a motel room

As they're waking up in the morning, the friend on the left says, "Man, I had the best dream last night that I was getting a h**...!" The friend on the right says, "That's crazy! I had the exact same dream!" Then the friend in the middle says, "Really?! I had a dream I was skiing".

What was the news headline when a crazy man s**... assaulted two laundry women and ran away?


I tickled my little brother's foot

I tickled my little brother's foot yesterday and my mom went crazy and said,

"Wait until he is born"

I bought shoes from a drug dealer today...

I dont know what he laced them with but i have been tripping like crazy

Mom#1- That's it. I'm done. I'm selling the kid on eBay

Mom#2- Don't be crazy. You made him. That does on Etsy
Happy Mother's Day everyone!

The cops in my town are looking for a crazy man. He was last seen having s**... with a laundry machine.

Nut screws washer and bolts.

A homeless vagabond approaches a woman, who is about to commit s**... from by throwing her self from the rooftop.

Vagabond says
- excuse me, lady. I know you are very depressed. But you know... eh... I've never been with a woman, can you sleep with me, your going to kill your self anyway...
Woman replies
-what, are you crazy!
To what he answers
-fine, I'll wait downstairs!

Guy A calls guy B

Guy A tells guy B, "I bet you I can get us the day off at work tommorow," so Guy A tells him that plan.l
The next day guy A goes to work and goes on the roof
The boss walks in and asks him what he's doing, guy A says "I'm a light bulb!"
The boss tells him that he's been working too hard and has gone crazy and tells him to go home
Guy B follows guy A out but the boss stops and says, "what are you doing?"
Guy B says, "I can't work in the dark!"

I saw a guy at the flower store. He was trying to pick the perfect bouquet for his wife. He said It's crazy how much money you gotta spend on something that's just going to die.

I said I know... And you gotta buy them flowers...

I'm a 5G installation engineer and people are constantly accusing me with bizarre conspiracy theories, such as how 5G is giving them headaches, or killing their s**.... I think they are completely crazy.

4G must've fried their brains.

I tickled my little sister's foot this morning and my mum went crazy about it...

..something about waiting until she was born

Six t**... women

Sounds crazy dozen t**...?

What's the difference between a banana and bananas?

One is just a banana and the other is crazy.
As told to me by my 10 year son.

What did the psychiatrist say to the n**... man?

I used to think you were crazy, but now I see your nuts.

How do you drive President Trump crazy?

Tell him you placed evidence of voter fraud in the corner of his office.

A doctor has an appointment

A doctor has an appointment with 3 of his crazy patient to see if they are doing any better.
He asks the first one: "3 times 4 ?"
Wrong. Disappointed, he asks the second one the same thing: "3 times 4 ?"
Wrong again, he asks the same thing to the third one: "3 times 4?"
The third one immediately answers "12".
The doctor is surprised that the last one got it right: "Wow, how did you get to that answer?"
"It was easy", says the last one. "I divided 1484 by wednesday".

Two cows are standing in a field

The first cow says to the second have you heard about this mad cow disease? It makes cows go crazy and then they die .
The second cow replies good thing I'm a helicopter

The #1 cause for accidents in Georgia is deer.

Which is crazy to me since they can't drive.

Dated a gold digger once.

I date this girl once, she was a solid 10. She was smoking hot, and crazy in bed. Things went south though, she claimed I lied about how much money I had.
And I was like my exact words where, that I has worth between 40 and 75 million dollars .
So what if it was only $2,165. It is still between $40- $75,000,000.

A man and a woman are talking in the office.

The man says: "I'm so tired from working, I wish I could get a day off."
The woman replies: "Don't worry, I have a way of doing that. Just watch me."
The woman proceeds to hang from a pipe.
Suddenly, the boss walks in a says: "What in the world are you doing?"
The woman replies: "I'm a light bulb."
The boss then says: "You must've gone crazy from all that working, you can take the day off."
The woman leaves. The man follows.
The boss asks the man: "Where are you going?"
The man then replies: "I'm going home. I can't work in the dark."

Offering corpses for free isnt just a sign that someone might be crazy

It's a dead giveaway

Crazy joke, Offering corpses for free isnt just a sign that someone might be crazy

jokes about crazy

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these crazy jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.