Crawled Jokes
36 crawled jokes and hilarious crawled puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about crawled that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Crawled Short Jokes
Short crawled jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The crawled humour may include short crawls jokes also.
- Last week, My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her Wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back.
- So I broke up with my handicapped girlfriend and stole her wheelchair.. But guess who came crawling back!!?!
- The last time my wife and I had a fight it ended up with her literally crawling to me on her hands and knees. She said "Get out from under that bed and fight like a man!"
- My girlfriend broke up with me cause I stole her wheelchair But I knew she'd come crawling back to me.
- My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair. It's ok though, she always comes crawling back.
- My girlfriend broke up with me for stealing her wheelchair But I'm not bothered, I know she'll come crawling back any day now
- I just killed a massive spider crawling across the floor with my shoe. I don't really care how big the spider is, no one steals my shoe.
- Two drunks are crawling on the railroad. One says "I'm tired of climbing this ladder, when's our floor already?"
"No worries, I see an elevator coming." - When I was a kid I was terrified of earwigs because I thought they were bugs that crawled into your ears. So you can imagine my reaction when I heard about cockroaches.
- I just killed a huge spider crawling along the floor with my shoe... I don't care how big a spider is, no-one steals my shoe...
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Crawled One Liners
Which crawled one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with crawled? I can suggest the ones about crept and crawling baby.
- My girlfriend broke up with me so I took her wheelchair Guess who came crawling back
- A spider just crawled into my keyboard. It's okay, I have it under Ctrl.
- I knew she'd come crawling to me.. I mean, I DID steal her wheelchair
- A spider crawled into my keyboard earlier. It's okay, I've got him under Ctrl.
- I knew you'd come crawling back the minute I stole your wheelchair
- So a spider just crawled onto my keyboard But don't worry I think it's under ctrl.
- A spider crawled on my computer Don't worry, it's under ctrl
- So a magician on a cruise night has a show every night... NOTSONINJA
- What was FDR's favorite room in the White House? The Crawl Space
- How do you get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand down.
- My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
- That's the last time I do a pub crawl with an amputee. He really couldn't hold his drink.
- Mu girlfriend cheated on me, So I took her wheelchair. Guess who came back crawling
- I took my girlfriends wheelchair away... Guess who came crawling back?
- I stole my girlfriends wheelchair. I knew she would be crawling back for me.
Heartwarming Crawled Jokes that Make You Laugh
What funny jokes about crawled you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean creep jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make crawled pranks.
FRESH HARAMBE OF BELL AIR....
In west Cincinnati I was born and raised on the zoo grounds is where I spent most of my days,Chillin out hangin out acting all cool, eating bananas out by the pool When a mom and her kid, they were up to no good, crawled over the fence into my neighborhood,I got in one little fight and my zoo keeper got scared, heard a gunshot just before I stopped breathing air.......
The Dying Man and the Cookies
An old man was on his death bed and had less than a day to live. As he lay there reflecting on his life, he smelled his favorite cookies in the kitchen. So using his last bit of will and effort, he dragged himself out of bed and crawled to the kitchen for a cookie. He sat down at the table and reached for one when his wife popped his hand with a wooden spoon: "Don't touch it! Those are for your f**...!"
A worm munches himself into the center of a cucumber.
He keeps eating the delicious cucumber center when all of a sudden he feels himself lifted into the sky and t**... into a jar. He peaks out of the cucumber to see a bunch of other cucumbers. All of a sudden he sees liquid being poured inside the jar.
He crawled back inside his cucumber grave where he thought to himself "I'm really in a pickle this time."
Two astronauts went to the moon
When they crawled out of their spaceship, it was a sight to behold. In the distance, there was a teepee and a Native American sitting near a fire. They approached the native and one of them said, Hello! We're from planet Earth! The native, with a scared look, says, Oh god, not again.
I was taking care of my friend's snake while he was on vacation, but somehow it crawled into our freezer and died...
I asked my wife, "What should I tell him?"
She said, "Just give it to him straight."
The final cookie
A man near death smelled his wife baking his favorite cookies down stairs. He decided if he was going to go he would have one last cookie before he went. He dragged his mostly useless body down the stairs and crawled to the counter where he knew the cookies were on the cooling rack. As he reached for a final treat his wife smacked him on the hand with a wooden spoon and said, "Those are for your f**... guests".
An old man was visiting his daughter and grandson
During the visit, the grandson crawled up into his lap and said "Grandpa, can you make a noise like a frog?"
"Why sure!" the man said & offered several croaking ribbit sounds.
Delighted, the boy jumped down and ran over to a nearby closet, working hard to remove a suitcase from the back.
"Now why do you need that all of a sudden?" the grandfather asked.
And the boy replied "Because Mama says we can go to Disney World when you croak!"
A man visits a h**.... As they are getting undressed, the man seems in awe of her lady bits. Watsamatta, hun? You ain't seen wonnadees since you crawled out of one?
No...it's just that I've never seen one I could crawl back into.
The cashmere sweater story
A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "Last night my wife crawled into bed with me and told me she'd do anything for a new cashmere sweater," the guy says. "So I asked, 'Anything?' nudge nudge wink wink, and she replied "ANYTHING!'" "Wow!" the bartender replies. "What did you do?" "I told her to learn how to knit."
A spider just crawled on your face.
I can see defeat in your eyes.
That turtle just crawled out of the sea you see!
I guess you could say it's a see-turtle!
I thought a bug crawled into my ear, but the doctor couldn't find anything.
I guess it was all in my head.
How did the baby pin the wrestler down?
It crawled onto his back and refused to move.
The snake slithers into the store, the lizard crawled into the store...
And the crocodile caiman
Why rabbit crawled into the hole?
He lives there, filthy mind.
