The Best 18 Craps Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Craps jokes. There are some craps betting jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these craps aces puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Craps Jokes and Puns

A beautiful blonde walks up to a craps table...

She bets ten thousand on one roll of the dice. She says, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel luckier when I'm nude."

She strips down and rolls the dice. When she sees the dice she jumps for joy screaming "I won! I won!" She hugs the dealers, takes her winnings and leaves.

Finally, one of the dealers asks, "What did she roll?" The other says, "I thought you were watching!"

It goes to show: Not all blondes are dumb, but men will always be men.

The Bet

Two casino dealers are at the craps table when a cute blonde comes over and says: "I want to bet $20,000 on a single roll of the dice. But, if you don't mind, I'd I feel much luckier if I were completely nude."

They agree to her unusual request and she strips naked from the neck down, and rolls the dice. Then she screams: "I won! I won!" She starts jumping up and down, hugs each of the dealers, and then picks up her money and her clothes and walks away.

For a minute the two dealers stare at each other. Then the first one says: "What did she roll, anyway?"

The second dealer says: "I don't know. I thought *you* were watching."

Don't be sad...

Don't be sad when a bird craps on your head. Be happy that dogs can't fly.

Craps joke, Don't be sad...

I've just opened a casino for dogs where they can play roulette, poker blackjack etc...

They'll have to go outside for craps though.

If you're concerned about your new partner's sexual history, and you don't want to catch genital warts, imagine you're playing chess, not craps.

So don't roll the dice. Check first, and then mate.

I know this guy who constantly tells jokes about how often he craps his pants

Self-defecating humor

Cousin: "What are you doing in the bathroom?"

Me: "I'm losing my ass in a game of craps!"

Craps joke, Cousin: "What are you doing in the bathroom?"

My friend is addicted to visiting Vegas and watching craps in a casino for hours.

Then one day, security dragged him out of the bathroom

What is it called when a politician craps his pants in a Honda?

Civic doody.

Kids asking for a dog.

I'll walk it. I'll feed it and if it craps in the yard, I'll flick it over the fence onto the neighbours lawn.

Why is Coolio always able to play craps?

He's got a gangsta's pair a dice.

You can explore craps poker reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean craps blackjack dad jokes. There are also craps puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

I wanted win some money playing Craps at the casino

But no dice.

Where does every craps player want to go when they die?


What did Coldplay say when they were asked to run a craps table?

"We need a pair of... pair of... pair of dice."

I'm a graphic designer for an online casino

I do a lot of arts & craps.

What is Scotty Pippen's favorite Vegas game?


Craps joke, What is Scotty Pippen's favorite Vegas game?

You'll never get rich playing craps.

It's just a fool's pair o' dice.

What do you call it when a dog craps on your rug?

Carpet bombing.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the craps bingo jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working craps dice piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes