Cramps Jokes
34 cramps jokes and hilarious cramps puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cramps that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Experience period cramps and pain? Brighten up your day with these jokes about period cramps, indigestion, and other menstrual issues. Get some much needed relief and make your friends laugh.
Funniest Cramps Short Jokes
Short cramps jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The cramps humour may include short pains jokes also.
- My girlfriend said to me the other day, "Why did God give women periods with cramp pains, and men nothing?" I laughed and replied, "Don't be silly, he gave us women."
- I ate an expired can of alphabet soup... Now I have severe cramps in my vowels and I've been in-consonant all day
- An Oxygen molecule go sees a doctor "Doc, Im suffering from terrible cramps" says the Oxygen Molecule.
"That's an easy fix," says the doctor, "Just eat some Potassium and you'll be OK!" - Dicksuckers Cramp Guy 1: "You know what this face is?"
*Holds mouth open in an O*
Guy 2: "No, what?"
Guy 1: "Dicksuckers Cramp, get it?"
Guy 2: "Yeah"
Guy 1: "How often?" - A quick conversation between a man and his Bene Gesserit girlfriend, who was going through menstrual cramps. "What's in the box?"
"Pain." - Despite the fact that whenever I eat any products with wheat in I get stomach cramps, I still regularly enjoy consuming it. You could say that I'm a gluten for pun-ishment.
- I've been playing my lute for 7 hours and my fingers are sore and stiff I have minstrel cramps.
- My Pollish grandma was telling me about one of the worst periods of her life She called it the concentration cramp
- (Misogynist Joke #4) - My girlfriend complains about how painful her period cramps are... I reminded her that's her fault for being a woman.
- I played my lute for 9 hours straight today and it's affected the joints in my hands. I think I have minstrel cramps.
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Cramps One Liners
Which cramps one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with cramps? I can suggest the ones about stomach pains and contractions.
- Why don't Jewish girls study on their period? Concentration Cramps
- You are the human version of period cramps.
- What do you get when you play the Lute for too long? Minstrel cramps!
- What hurts more than a breakup? Muscle cramps.
- I finally found away to avoid cramps. Stay far away from women.
- I'm uncomfortable with abortion. It gives me cramps.
- What red, really painful, and sings? John Menstrual Cramp.
- How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only 2 but it's a bit cramped
- Why was the fungi so cramped Because there was not mushroom.
- Why do women get menstrual cramps? Because they deserve them!
- What book did Anne Frank write after running 10 miles? Mein Cramp.
- What do you get when your medieval court singers are off key? Minstrel cramps.
- Mrs Claus hospitalised with severe cramps. Heavy Christmas period to blame.
- What do singers get during their periods? Minstrel cramps.
- Women complaining about menstrual cramps... ...are simply o**... acting.
Period Cramps Jokes
Here is a list of funny period cramps jokes and even better period cramps puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- (Misogyny Joke) My girlfriend was complaining about having "painful period cramps" I told her it was her fault for being a woman.
ha - My friend was on her period and said she wishes I got her cramps I said I would be cramping her style
Delightful Fun Cramps Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What funny jokes about cramps you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean back ache jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make cramps pranks.
A woman goes to the doctors complaining of stomach cramps...
She gets sent off for some test and comes back a week later.
"Well, I hope you're ready for endless sleepless nights of crying and changing dirty diapers!" the doc says.
"Wow, you mean I'm pregnant?" the woman replies thrilled.
"No, you've got bowel cancer."
A woman sees her doctor about ongoing abdominal pain and cramps.
She's nervous during the examination, fearing that she may be pregnant. The doctor brings back her test results and says, "It looks like you'll have to get used to changing diapers from now on."
"Oh my god, I'm pregnant?" she asks, nearly in tears. "Am I pregnant?"
The doctor replies, "No, you have bowel cancer."
Have you ever had a leg cramp ruin s**...?
I'm sitting on the chair when my cramps up and I Yelp so loud that my wife and her boyfriend stop having s**.... They look at me and say "how long have you been there?" And I say "The whole time! I'm the one making this video."
The blind date
A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. After a few drinks he approaches the bartender, "Hey, maybe you can help me out. I've just got hit with horrible heart burn, gas and stomach cramps, but I can't leave to get anything because I'm supposed to meet my blind date here in 15 minutes and I don't want her to think I stood her up. Have you got anything?" "No, I feel fine," the bartender replies.
Just had a strange phone survey
They asked:
* How's the knee feeling?
* Do you prefer shorts or long pants?
* Do you ever get cramps in your calf area?
I interrupted and said, Hey, this is weird. Why are you asking such strange questions?
The surveyor laughed and said, I'm just polling your leg.
