Craigslist Jokes

Following is our collection of facebook puns and advertise one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Craigslist jokes for adults, dirty ebay jokes and clean merchandise dad gags for kids.

The Best Craigslist Puns

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer.

"I put an ad on Craigslist today trying to sell my pet python," he tells the bartender. "Is it big?" the bartender asks. "It's freakin' huge!" the guy replies. "How many feet?" the bartender asks. "None you idiot," the guy replies. "It's a snake."

I was browsing Craigslist the other day, when I came across someone who wanted to learn how to make macaroni.

Being a master macaroni maker myself, I responded to his offer, and we set up a time and place to meet so I could teach him. When we met up, he took one look at me, and he told me that I didn't look like someone who could even make halfway decent macaroni. "Sir", I assured him, "I promise I'm a master of my Kraft."

I saw an ad on Craigslist "Radio, $1, volume stuck on high."

I thought, "I can't turn that down...


A man placed an ad on his local craigslist: "Wife wanted".

Next day he received a hundred letters.

They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

I just bought a used time machine on craigslist.

They sure don't make them like they're going to anymore.

Why couldn't Pinocchio get a date on craigslist

because everyone wanted "no strings attatched"

I had a date with a six foot, eight inch drag queen I found on Craigslist.

Boy was I disappointed when I discovered he was 6'8

browsing craigslist

Saw a post for a hot water heater for sale. I responded and asked if it worked on cold water as well.

Does Craigslist have friends for sale?

Asking for a friend

Scientists have a new working theory on what happened before the Big Bang.

Your mom put an ad on Craigslist.

I found a cheap prosthetic arm on Craigslist


The police station installed "Safe Spots" for Craigslist sales...

Which is great because I always met in a park under a tree but it always seemed so shady.

Craigslist Personals and Backpage are gone.

Congressional Cockblock

I found a very lucrative deal on the firearms section on Craigslist.

A French MAS36 rifle. Never fired, dropped once.

Last month I unknowingly purchased stolen roofing supplies. I wrote a Craigslist post to alert others...


I ordered a chicken and an egg off Craigslist

The chicken was dead and the egg was cracked

I like my women like I like my cars

Fast, loud, used off craigslist.

Did you hear where they're looking for the new James Bond actor?

In Daniel Craigslist

Do you ever leave a craigslist ad up after you've sold the item just to get that little rush when someone texts you?

Ya me neither.

I saw a post on Craigslist that said: Radios for sale, $1 each, Volume knobs stuck on full.

Turns out he was selling a high volume

I saw a truck for sale on DC Craigslist, it was old and ugly, made terrible noises and got laughed right out of Washington

It was a Christine Blasey Ford

Why don't people sell their soul to God?

He hasn't put up an ad on Craigslist yet.

My Dad went to Craigslist and had this conclusion...

Why is the NSA seeking so many friends that have health insurance and other benefits

Well, there was only one thing I could say when I walked into the wrong motel room answering a Craigslist ad.

Wrong sub

There is an abundance of bargain jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 24 funniest jokes and craigslist puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any reddit witze you can hear about craigslist.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

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