The Best 20 Countdown Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Countdown jokes. There are some countdown metre jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these countdown requirements puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Countdown Jokes and Puns

The Millenium Falcon is taking off...

Han Solo asks C3PO to give him a countdown, and C3PO says..


Han interrupts him and asks what the heck he's doing.

C3 says "You told me to never tell you the odds"

First I got a tattoo on my cervical that said "5".

Next, I got one on my thoracic that said "4"

Then, I got one on my lumbar that said "3"

After that, I got one on my Sacrum that said 2"

And now, I'm getting one on my Coccyx that says "1"

It's the spinal countdown.

Today is the final countdown...


Countdown joke, Today is the final countdown...

What do you call Dracula's retarded cousin?


This was a joke I heard on TV some time ago ... Thought it was worth a share.

A Mexican magician tells a crowd he's going to disappear on the count of three...

He begins the countdown. "Uno, dos..." then, poof! He disappeared without a tres.

My friend asked me if I wanted to watch Countdown with them

"What's that?", I replied, "Dracula's retarded brother?"

What do you sing when you kill Dracula's last clone?

"It's the final countdown"

Countdown joke, What do you sing when you kill Dracula's last clone?

Roy Moore missed the New Years Eve countdown.

He's demanding a recount.

Tomorrow will be the final countdown...



is Dracula's retarded brother.

The band Europe is rereleasing their greatest hits on records.

It's the vinyl countdown.

You can explore countdown polak reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean countdown finale dad jokes. There are also countdown puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Apparently the Brexit is inspiring other countries to hold their own referenda, and could lead to the breakup of the EU.

Could this be The Final Countdown for Europe?

A Mexican magician was performing a magic show

He said that he will vanish by the count of 3. So he started the countdown



And then he vanished without a tres

Career counsellor: "Why did you flop during the interview at Houston Space Centre?" Billy: "I failed the countdown bit." "What did you say?"

"Countdown 1...2...3...4...

I heard the band Europe wrote a song about the days leading to the end-of-semester exams.

It was the finals countdown.


With the decline of newspapers worldwide, staff in-house have been referring to the obituaries

as the Subscriber Countdown

Countdown joke, With the decline of newspapers worldwide, staff in-house have been referring to the obituaries

Why was the New Years countdown this year longer than the rest?

Because it is 20 19, 18, 17, 16...

I never want to go to the New Years Countdown ever again!

I just got out of prison for Assault. I got really nervous because an Arab was next to me counting down from 10. So I punched him...

How many countdown contestants does it take to change a blibulght?

Why do old fashioned races start with a countdown from a bikini model?

It's the thot that counts

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the countdown clock jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working countdown clockwork piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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