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Count Dracula Jokes

65 count dracula jokes and hilarious count dracula puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about count dracula that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Count Dracula Short Jokes

Short count dracula jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The count dracula humour may include short vlad impaler jokes also.

  1. I just got a job in a factory making plastic dracula There are only two of us on the production line, so I have to make every second count
  2. I was working in a factory making plastic Draculas for Halloween. There was only 2 of us on the production line so I had to make every second count
  3. For Halloween I've got a job making plastic Draculas There's only two of us working here so I have to make every second count.
  4. I work on a two-person assembly line of Dracula toys... I've got to make every second count
  5. I think there are nine vampires coming to my dinner party. Oh, wait... I forgot to Count Dracula.
  6. I work in a factory that makes Dracula figurines. However, there are only 2 employees so I have to make every second count.
  7. I work in a toy factory where dracula dolls are produced... I only have one colleague at the production line so I have to make every second count.
  8. My brother and I started a business manufacturing Dracula toys I have to make every second Count
  9. Did you know Dracula had a brother who feasted on pancakes? His name was Count Spatula
    (Tried this out on my kids the other day. It went horrifically bad)
  10. Count Dracula returned a mirror to my shop yesterday He said it wasn't faulty, he just couldn't see himself using it.

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Count Dracula One Liners

Which count dracula one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with count dracula? I can suggest the ones about vlad the impaler and dr who.

  1. What did Trump say when Dracula ran away with his things? STOP THE COUNT!
  2. Did you know vampires aren't real? Unless you Count Dracula.
  3. Are Monsters good at math? Not unless you Count Dracula.
    Happy Spooktober everyone.
  4. I was trying to remember all the vampires I know. But I forgot to Count Dracula.
  5. What do Dracula's girlfriend and a boxer have in common? They both go down for the Count
  6. Vampires aren't even a real thing. Unless you Count Dracula
  7. Why did Count Dracula fail art class? He could only draw blood.
  8. Are monsters good at math? No, unless you Count Dracula
  9. How many teeth does Dracula have? I don't know. I didn't get close enough to Count.
  10. How many monsters can do basic math? All of them, unless you count Dracula
  11. How many vampires does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It depends if you Count Dracula.
  12. Vampires aren't real? Unless, you Count Dracula.
  13. You do realize that Vampires aren't real... Unless you Count Dracula.
  14. What do you call it when a boxer gives Dracula a BJ? Going down for the count
  15. I saw a vampire for sale at half price in the shop It was a dis-count Dracula

Count Dracula Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about count dracula you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean vampire bat jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make count dracula pranks.

If a wizard was knocked out by Dracula in a fight what would he be?
Out for the count!

Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.

Recently I heard about a vampire that was so mathematically challenged that he couldn't count Dracula!

Dracula

Why is Dracula's favorite subject in school Math? Because he likes to Count.

Collection of dog Jokes

what do you call batman's dog? a Bat Terrier
What do you call sleeping puppies? Hush Puppies
what do you call a magic dog? A; a labra-cadabra-brador
what do you call count draculas dog? a blood hound
why is it called a litter of puppies? because theyll trash the place
Previously posted by me:what do you call a litter of puppies who've been out in the snow? Slush Puppies
What do you call a dog with no legs? it doesn't matter they're not coming
Whats the coolest dog? A pup-sicle
What do dogs have that no other animal has? Puppy Dogs

Count Dracula survived on the blood of 18 year old virgins for Millennia...

He died last year.

What did the cashier say after handing down a w**... of currency to Dracula?

"Count Dracula."

Count Dracula walks into a bar...

and asks the bar man for a cup of boiling water. The bar man quickly returns with the water as requested, and puts it on the bar in front of Dracula. Curious, the bar man says to Dracula "Forgive me, but I thought you vampires only drank blood, what do you want the hot water for?" Dracula takes a used t**... from his cloak pocket. "For making tea, of course" replies Dracula.

Dracula & Frankenstein are in the heavyweight championship. Who wins?

Dracula. Frankenstein went down for the count.

What is Dracula's girlfriend called when she gives him head?

Down for the count!

Why did Dracula fail math?

He forgot how to Count.

I got into a fist fight with a Dracula fan over who's the best vampire.

He put up a good fight until I caught him with a mean hook to the temple.
He was down for The Count.

I just opened an action figure factory

It's a pretty small operation right now, just me and my buddy Frank and we're only making one kind of Dracula action figure. We really need to get things off the ground so I have to make every second Count.

What's it called when Dracula lists numbers?

A Count

What do you call Dracula's special needs brother?

Count Down

Why does Dracula like sending out checks?

Idk, I guess it's just a count thing.

Party p**...

Why isn't Count Dracula invited to more parties?
Because he's a pain in the neck!

What do you call a s**... vampire?

Can't count Dracula

I work at a factory that makes plastic Dracula figures...

However, there's only two of us running the factory line, so I have to make every second count.

Most vampires s**... at maths

unless you Count Dracula

I tried to make a comprehensive list of all the vampires in classical literature.

But I forgot to Count Dracula.

I had to knock a goose unconscious to collect his feathers for Dracula's pillow.

Now he's down for the Count.

Halloween joke

What do Dracula's girlfriend and a bad boxer have in common?
They both go down for the count!

A friend of mine worked at a production line for a toy factory, producing Dracula dolls. Shortly before Halloween, demand was high, but he only had one colleague.

So he had to make every second Count.

I just lost a boxing match in Transylvania

I was working for Dracula part time and had to run an errand half way through. Referee said I was apparently out for the Count.