The Best 22 Count Cows Jokes

Following is our collection of funniest Count Cows jokes. There are some count cows jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these count cows puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny Count Cows Jokes and Puns

A cowboy thought he had 100 cows but when he counted them there were only 97

So he rounded them up.

A farmer was counting his cows....

A farmer was counting his cows and initially only counted 196, but when he rounded them up he had 200.

How does a farmer count his cows??

with a Cowculator!!

I have ADHD and have troubles getting to sleep. Doctor recommended counting sheep...

1 sheep. 2 sheep. 3 sheep. Cow. Duck. Horse. *Old MacDonald had a farm* and bingo was his name-o!

A Farmer and his cows

A farmer counted his Cows before taking them to auction and counted 196 of them. But when he rounded them up, he had 200.


A series of cow jokes

Q: What do you call a sleeping cow?
A: A bull-dozer
Q: How does a farmer count his cows?
A: With a cowculator
Q: Why do cows wear bells?
A: Because their horns don't work
Q: Why don't cows have money?
A: The farmers milk them dry
Q: What's a grumpy cow called?
A: Moooody

So a farmer went out into his field and counted 48 cows

But When His dog rounded them up there were 50.

How do you count cows?

With a COW CULATOR

Sorry, I'll shut up now.

Guy #1 I've never been good at counting cows.

Guy #2: Let me count .... hmmm .... 1341.

Guy #1: Wow! That is impressive. How did you do that?

Guy #2: Easy. I just count the legs and divide by 4.

A farmer was worried when he counted only 196 cows...

...but when he rounded them up, much to his relief, he had 200.

2 strangers are sitting on a train.

As they pass a cow field. One man says to the other, "What a nice field, man having 143 cows must be a lot of work"

The other man, astonished, replies "Wow, I happen to own that field and how did you know there were exactly 143 cows?"

The man replied "Easy, I counted the legs and divided by 4!"

You can explore count cows reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean count cows dad jokes. There are also count cows puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Q: How do you count cows?
A: With a cowculator.

An insecure farmer didn't know how many cows he owned...

...so he counted them all, and came to the total of 196 cows. He asked a neighbouring farmer for a second opinion. She came up with a total of 200 cows.

Perplexed by this, the man counted again, and once again came up with 196 cows. He once again asked his neighbour to count them. Again, she reached 200 cows. When he asked her how they were getting different numbers, she said

"I rounded them up."

How does a farmer count his cows?

With a COWculator...

But, what if they all have babies?

Then he MOOtiplies them!

Man, I'm really milking these puns for more than they're worth...

A farmer counted 196 cows in the pasture.

But he rounded them up and had 200.

As kids on a farm we had to round up the cows.

I'd count eleven and just say there were a dozen.

How do you count cows?

You use a cow-culator.

Or you round them up.

Or any other method the commenters want.

Can't remember this joke 100% about a farmer counting his cows.

It has something to do with counting the heads of all his cattle and then I think it ends in a really dry punch line. Any help?

EDIT* got it thanks to /u/noncharacteristic

"A farmer in the field with his cows counted 196 of them, but when he rounded them up he had 200."

How do farmers count their cattle?

With a *cow*culator


a cowboy

A cowboy in the field with his cows counted 96 of them, but when he rounded them up he had 100.

Q: How do you count cows?
A: With a cowculator.

A farmer counted his cows...

There was a total of 196 but when he rounded them up he got 200.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the count cows jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working count cows piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes