Cougar Woman Jokes
10 cougar woman jokes and hilarious cougar woman puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cougar woman that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Share These Cougar Woman Jokes With Friends
Cougar Woman Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good cougar woman joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
So my parents were "debating" at the dinner table the other night
Mom: Cougar is the term used to describe an older woman who desires young men. I'm seeing a double standard here. Why isn't there a term for an older man who desires young women? What is he called?
Dad: Smart.
Itchipussy
A cougar had just finished purchasing groceries. The clerk asks if she would like any help out. The woman, seeing the bag boy was an attractive young man, she says she would. In the parking lot she sees her chance to make a move, and does:
Woman: (whispers) Hey cutie, I've got an itchipussy.
Bag boy: Look lady, all these Japanese cars look alike to me, you'll have to point it out.
An older woman who dates younger men is called a cougar. What do you call an older man who dates younger women?
Rich.
When a women dates a younger man she's called a cougar, when a man dates a younger woman he is called
Defendant.
If an older woman who goes after a younger man is called a cougar, what is an older man going after a younger girl called?
A Tyga
I was doing some research yesterday about the Dunning-Cougar effect.
It seems the more someone knows about a topic, the less likely they are to claim they know that much. Conversely, the less someone knows, the more likely they'll try to use that information to pick up an older woman in a bar.
If a "cougar" is an older woman who is into younger men, what do you call an older woman who is into younger women?
my face popped a vessel during this
I was at work today, just pricing a huge shipment of tools. This random customer comes up to me, he says Hello. I reply with a kind gesture. He then proceeds with this:
Customer "Do you know what a cougar is?"
Me "yep"
Customer "So, you know that there are two kinds?"
I giggled a bit and answered,
Me "Yes"
Customer "do you know what a tiger is?"
I figured he was implying the tiger to be like a cougar(as in an older woman seeking young men) but i wasn't sure.
Me "i don't think so, what is it?"
Customer "Its a cougar with stretch marks!"
I started to laugh pretty hard. Was so taken off guard by his answer that I dropped the manure fork on my boots.
Me "Good show! You my good man, are my favourite for today."
He smiled and I gave him a discount on all his items.
All men are l**...
An old Marine Pilot sat down at the Starbucks, still wearing his old USMC flight suit and leather jacket and ordered a cup of coffee.
As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the pilot and asked, 'Are you a real pilot?'
He replied, 'Well, I've spent my whole life flying planes, first Stearmans, then the early Grummans... flew a Wildcat and Corsair in WWII, and later in the Korean conflict, Banshees and Cougars. I've taught more than 260 people to fly and given rides to hundreds, so I guess I am a pilot, and you, what are you?
She said, 'I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about n**... women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about n**... women. When I shower, I think about n**... women. When I watch TV, I think about n**... women. It seems everything makes me think of n**... women.'
The two sat sipping in silence.
A little while later, a young man sat down on the other side of the old pilot and asked: "are you a real pilot?"
He replied, 'I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian.'
a woman...
who likes younger men is a cougar, a man that likes younger boys is a Nittany Lion
Share These Cougar Woman Jokes With Friends