Cosmetic Surgery Jokes
12 cosmetic surgery jokes and hilarious cosmetic surgery puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cosmetic surgery that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Cosmetic Surgery Short Jokes
Short cosmetic surgery jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The cosmetic surgery humour may include short plastic surgery jokes also.
- Cosmetic surgery used to be such a sensitive subject. But now when you make jokes about botox, nobody lifts an eyebrow.
- There's a new cosmetic surgery that makes you look like an Eskimo. You might wanna look Inuit.
- I'm not saying cosmetic surgery cured my depression But it definitely put a smile on my face.
- A person decided to go to a cosmetic surgeon for a face lift and the surgeon said, "You're beautiful just the way you are." "After the surgery, of course."
- A rich friend of mine had lots of cosmetic surgery and even had a number of her organs repositioned. Still, her heart's in the right place.
- Cosmetic surgery used to be such a t**... subject. Now when you talk about botox no one raises an eyebrow
- Cosmetic surgery used to be a t**... subject... Now you can talk about Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.
- Cosmetic surgery used to be a pretty t**... subject Now you mention botox, and nobody raises an eyebrow.
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Cosmetic Surgery One Liners
Which cosmetic surgery one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with cosmetic surgery? I can suggest the ones about cosmetic and plastic surgeon.
- If anyone knows how to correct cosmetic surgery that's gone horribly wrong? I'm all ears.
Ridiculous Cosmetic Surgery Jokes to Spark Fun and Laughter
What funny jokes about cosmetic surgery you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean breast surgery jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make cosmetic surgery pranks.
Surgery
After her fifth child, Jane decided that she should have some cosmetic surgery "down below" to restore herself to her former youthful glory because her gammon was dangling a bit too low and looked like a ripped out fireplace. Time and childbirth had taken its toll and she reckoned that, with five children now being the limit, she'd tidy things with a n**... here and a tuck there so it looked more like a piggy bank slot rather than a badly packed kebab.
Following the operation she awoke from her anaesthetic to find three roses at the end of the bed.
"Who are these from?" she asked the nurse, "They're very nice but I'm a bit confused as to why I've received them". "Well" said the nurse, "The first is from the surgeon - the operation went so well and you were such a model patient that he wanted to say thanks".
"Ah, that's really nice" said Jane.
"The second is from your husband - he's delighted the operation was such a success that he can't wait to get you home. Apparently it'll be the first time he's touched the sides for years and he's very excited!".
"Brilliant!" said Jane." "And the third?".
"That's from Eric in the burns unit" said the nurse..............he just wanted to say thanks for his new ears."
A man was in a terrible accident...
and his 'manhood' was mangled and torn from his body. His doctor assured him that modern medicine could give him back his manhood, but that his insurance wouldn't cover the surgery since it was considered cosmetic. The doctor said the cost would be $3,500 for 'small, $6,500 for 'medium, and $14,000 for 'large.'
The man was sure he would want a medium or large, but the doctor urged him to talk it over with his wife before he made any decision. The man called his wife on the phone and explained their options. The doctor came back into the room, and found the man looking dejected.
'Well, what have the two of you decided?' asked the doctor.
'She'd rather remodel the kitchen.'