Corvette Jokes
30 corvette jokes and hilarious corvette puns to laugh out loud. Read vehicle jokes about corvette that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Fun and humorous corvette jokes for all car lovers and owners of the iconic roadster. Who says Cadillacs and Mustangs have all the jokes? Check out these corvette jokes that'll surely whip your smiles into overdrive.
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Funniest Corvette Short Jokes
Short corvette jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The corvette humour may include short sports car jokes also.
- Best math teacher ever! Mr. Johnson never makes us do any work, so all 25 of us are pitching in $6.17 to get him that cool new $50,000 Corvette he wants. Thanks Mr. Johnson!
- Why did the unvaccinated one year-old try to buy a Corvette? Don't we all do that during a midlife crisis?
- What is the definition of bitter sweet? Your Mother in law driving off a cliff in your brand new Corvette.
- So what would you call a veterinary doctor riding a Corvette in the rain? A vet, in the wet, in the 'Vette.
- What's the fastest branch of the military? The Marines. When they retire, they're corvettes.
- What's the difference between a Corvette and a pile of... What's the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead h**...?
I don't have a Corvette in my garage...
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Corvette One Liners
Which corvette one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with corvette? I can suggest the ones about race car and ford car.
- What do you call a Corvette following a Camaro at high speeds? Chevy Chase.
- Did you know that there was a corvette known for exploding? It was the C4
- Why did the birthing coach buy a red Corvette? She was having a midwife crisis.
- What do you call a retired Marine in a Chevy sports car? A Corps vet in a Corvette.
- What do sports cars wear to look thinner? A Corvette
- How did the Corvette driver want to be buried? Two inches lower.
- Did you hear about the proctologists collectible Corvettes? He wrecked em'.
Fun-Filled Corvette Jokes to Boost Your Mood
What funny jokes about corvette you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean cheetah jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make corvette pranks.
The police vs the senior citizen
A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mp...h, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this," and pulled over to await the trooper's arrival. Pulling in behind him, the trooper walked up to the Corvette, looked at his watch, and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a reason for speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."
The old gentleman paused. Then he said, "Years ago, my wife
ran off with a State trooper. I thought you were bringing her back."
"Have a good day, sir," replied the trooper
We have everything!
Two schoolboys are talking to each other. One of them says that after school ends, he'll have to go shopping with his parents, because they need to buy some things.
The other boy says: "And I don't, because now we have everything we need".
The first one asks him: "How do you know"?
He answers: "Because yesterday Dad came home in a Corvette convertible, and Mom said *"g**..., Chris, that's the last thing we needed!"*
I saw my boss pull up in a brand new corvette
I said "wow that's a really nice car, boss!" He told me "thanks, and just remember you keep working hard every day and I'll be able to buy a second one!"
A snail decides to buy a car...
There's this snail. All his life, all he's ever wanted was a little red corvette, convertible, with a b**... "S" painted on the hood. He saves and saves and finally buys his life-long dream. He pulls out of the dealership and his driving down the street, proud as can be. Two guys, waiting at a crosswalk, spot the snail in his new car, and one says to the other, "hey man, look at that S car go!!!"
Man in Restaurant Sees Extremely Attractive Woman Sitting Alone...
so he decides to send her a nice bottle of wine. The waiter brings it and the lady looks at the bottle for a moment and sends a message back to the man.
It reads: 'For me to accept this bottle of wine you must have a Mercedes in your garage, a few million dollars in your bank, and seven inches in your pants.'
He reads the message, laughs, and sends back one of his own: 'Just send it back. I have a Ferrari, Mercedes, and a Corvette. I have twenty million in the bank and a house in Aspen, LA, and Miami.
But I will NEVER cut three inches off for any woman.'
The science teacher stood in the front of the class and said, "Children, if you could have one raw material in the world, what would it be?"
Little Stevie raised his hand and said "I would want gold, because gold is worth a lot of money and I could buy a Corvette." The teacher nodded, and then she called on little Susie.
Little Susie said, "I would want platinum because platinum is worth more than gold and I could buy a Porsche." The teacher smiled, and then she called on Little Johnny.
Little Johnny stood up and said, "I would want silicone." The teacher said, "Silicone? Why silicone, Little Johnny?" "Because my mom has two bags of the stuff and you should
see all the sports cars outside our house!"
You've had a bad day but...
The parachute company says you'll get a full refund.
The flesh eating virus barely touched your other arm.
Imagine what would have happened if your ex-wife had a *good* lawyer.
The fertility drugs worked 4 times better than expected.
The insurance company said they will pay the full book value of $455 for your 1966 Corvette.
At least the operation was partially successful.
Don't worry about who the real father is, your son's chances of getting a full scholarship just increased significantly!
And what starting salary are you looking for?
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asked a young Engineer fresh out of MIT, "And what starting salary were you looking for?"
The Engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package."
The interviewer enquires, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years say, a red Corvette?"
The Engineer sits up straight and says, "Wow! Are you kidding?"
And the interviewer replies, "Yeah, but you started it."
Job interview
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asked a young Engineer fresh out of MIT, "And what starting salary were you looking for?"
The Engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package."
The interviewer enquires, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years say, a red Corvette?"
The Engineer sits up straight and says, "Wow! Are you kidding?"
And the interviewer replies, "Yeah, but you started it."
Engineer searching for a job
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asks a young engineer fresh out of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, "And what starting salary are you looking for?" The engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer inquires, "Well, what would you say to a package of five weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every two years, say, a red Corvette?" The engineer sits up straight and says, "Wow! Are you kidding?" The interviewer replies, "Yeah, but you started it."
"Wow! Are you kidding?"
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asks a young engineer fresh out of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, "And what starting salary are you looking for?" The engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer inquires, "Well, what would you say to a package of five weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every two years, say, a red Corvette?" The engineer sits up straight and says, "Wow! Are you kidding?" The interviewer replies, "Yeah, but you started it."
Are you kidding?
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Person asked a young Engineer fresh out of MIT, "And what starting salary were you looking for?"
The Engineer said, "In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package."
The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5 weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, a company matching retirement fund for 50% of your salary, and a company car leased every 2 years -- say, a red Corvette?"
The Engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?"
And the interviewer replied, "Yeah, but you started it."
