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Correction Jokes

41 correction jokes and hilarious correction puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about correction that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Find some hilarious jokes about correction officers! Read about the yummy snacks the officer refused to give back and the 'watchtower' that made for a great getaway. Laugh about their creative use of their supply closet!

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Funniest Correction Short Jokes

Short correction jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The correction humour may include short correctness jokes also.

  1. I called two girls hipsters and got slapped. Apparently the correct term is "conjoined twins".
  2. I got fired from my job because I kept asking my customers whether they would prefer Smoking or Non-smoking . Apparently the correct terms are Cremation and Burial .
  3. I angered two people by calling them hipsters... Apparently the correct term is conjoined twins.
  4. My friend gets really upset when I call him a flat-Earther He says the correct term is bulldozer operator.
  5. I hate how politically correct the world is these days, you can't even say black paint You have to say
    Leroy, please paint that wall
  6. Fun fact: "sugar" is the only word in the English language where "su-" makes a "sh" sound. . . At least, I'm pretty sure that's correct.
  7. Me: The earth isn't flat! fiat earther: correct
    me: huh?
    fiat earther: it's the shape of an Italian car
    me: what?
    fiat earther: you read my name wrong didn't you?
  8. 62% of Kentuckians pronounce their state capital "Loo-uh-vul", while 38% say "Loo-ee-ville". Unfortunately, the correct answer is Frankfort.
  9. 4th of July, The only time of the year Americans say the day and month in the correct order.
  10. My daughter said she needed adult supervision I told her she'd have to find someone else because I wear corrective lenses

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Correction One Liners

Which correction one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with correction? I can suggest the ones about correct spelling and spelling mistake.

  1. Fun fact: You can't breathe correctly while smiling Just kidding, I made you smile :)
  2. Teacher: What is 117 + 3? Johny: 5!
    Teacher: Correct..
  3. The inventor of auto-correct has died his funnel is tomato
  4. We'll we'll we'll If it isn't auto correct.
  5. I admit I was wrong about how good my chiropractor is. I stand corrected.
  6. What's the correct way to pronounce nihilism? Doesn't matter.
  7. I didn't think my doctor could fix my bowed legs. I stand corrected.
  8. Auto-correct walks into a bar... And the batman says, 'why the log fence?'
  9. I'm giving up alcohol for a month!!! Correction: I'm giving up! Alcohol for a month!!
  10. The only way to spell incorrectly correctly Is to spell it incorrectly.
  11. I used to hate chiropractors until I went to see one for my back Now I stand corrected
  12. "I stand corrected" Says the man wearing orthopedic shoes
  13. I used to think chiropractic adjustments didn't work. I stand corrected
  14. I thought chiropractors were a waste of money But I stand corrected.
  15. I bought a 5 gallon drum of correction fluid the other day. Big mistake.

Correction Officer Jokes

Here is a list of funny correction officer jokes and even better correction officer puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • how many corrections officers does it take to throw an inmate down the stairs? none he fell
  • "It's really difficult, my partner is constantly in and out of prison." "Babe, that's a terrible way to tell people I'm a Corrections Officer."
  • A man walks in to the doctor's office with a banana in his ear… the doctor says, You're not eating correctly.
  • A police officer pulled me over. "Hello, there!" I said.
    He said, "Sir, I'm almost certain I can smell alcohol on your breath. About 95%"
    I said, "Correction, whiskey is about 40%"
  • My girlfriend asked me to choose between her and the office. Which episode do you think I should watch today?

    Correction: Ex-girlfriend\*
  • Microsoft Office doesn't correct Chuck Norris.
    Chuck Norris correct Microsoft Office.
  • What did the cat say to the correctional officer? Let MEOWWWWWOUT!!
  • A cop pulls over a s**... The cop looks at him and asks "How high are you?" to which the s**... replies "No officer, the correct way to say it is Hi how are you."
Correction joke, A cop pulls over a s**...

Loads of Fun with Charming Humor Correction Jokes

What funny jokes about correction you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean correctly jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make correction pranks.

By legalizing Cannabis and same-s**... marriage we finally interpreted the bible correctly:

**"A man who lays with another man should be s**...."** [Leviticus 20:13 esv]
Edit1: a typo
Edit2: thanks for the gold humorous stranger!

Trump should not have said "s**...-hole countries".

The correct term is "t**...-world countries".

A woman visits her husband in prison

Before leaving, she tells a correction officer:
"You shouldn't make my husband work like that. He's exhausted!"
The officer laughs, saying:
"Are you kidding? He just eats and sleeps and stays in his own cell!"
"b**...! He just told me he's been digging a tunnel for months!"

A teacher told the students, "The person who answers my next question correctly gets to leave class early."

A teacher told the students, "The person who answers my next question correctly gets to leave class early."
Suddenly, a pen came flying across to room, practically hitting the teacher in the face.
"Who threw that?!" the teacher shouted angrily.
"Me!" piped up a voice from the back of the classroom. "Can I leave now?"

After s**... with my new girlfriend last night she snuggled up next to me and said, "You are definitely the biggest I've ever had."

Apparently "ditto" wasn't the correct response.
Thanks for the updates friends, I just don't know how people get those yellowish stars and would really like to learn.
[edit] Thank you for the gold kind stranger.

A blonde woman visits her husband in prison.

Before leaving, she tells a correction officer: You shouldn't make my husband work like that. He's exhausted!
The officer laughs and says, Are you kidding? He just eats and sleeps and stays in his cell!
The wife replies: Bullsht! He just told me he's been digging a tunnel for months!

Maybe replacement theory is correct.

Even neo-n**...'s are being replaced by black people.

A woman sues a man for defamation of character, charging that he called her a pig.

The man is found guilty and made to pay damages. After the trial, he asks the judge, Does this mean that I can no longer call Ms. Harding a pig?
The judge says, That is correct.
And does it mean that I can't call a pig Ms. Harding?
No, says the judge, you are free to call a pig Ms. Harding. There is no crime in that.
The man looks Ms. Harding in the eye and says, Good afternoon, Ms. Harding.

A new law

Two guys walk into a bar and order lunch. "What brings you guys in today?" the bartender asks. "I guess you haven't heard yet. The mayor passed a law yesterday to try to help out local restaurants during Covid-19. All adult males are required to go and eat lunch out with their best male friends at least once a week," one of the guys answers the bartender. "Well it's not a law really," the other guy corrects him. "It's more of a mandate."

Correction joke, A new law