Corporate Jokes
46 corporate jokes and hilarious corporate puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about corporate that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Do you have what it takes to make it in the corporate world? Find out with our roundup of the best corporate jokes to make you laugh away the corporate blues. From corporate finance to corporate governance, these jokes can liven up any corporate office, executive meeting, or corporate trainer meeting. Get ready to chuckle your way through corporate America and its revenues while you learn valuable lessons on corporate life.
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Funniest Corporate Short Jokes
Short corporate jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The corporate humour may include short corporation jokes also.
- I have an irrational fear of large intricate corporate buildings. You could say I have a complex complex complex.
- What do American police have in common with American Congress? They only serve and protect corporate interests.
- camouflage training Drill Sergeant: "I DID NOT SEE YOU AT camouflage TRAINING THIS MORNING CORPORAL!!!!"
Corporal: "Thank you sir." - What are the two biggest lies when working for a large corporation? "Hello. I'm from the head office and I'm here to help you"
"Welcome. We're glad to have you" - Medieval Minstrels were the first victims of EA's corporate greed They could only access their instruments by opening Lute Boxes
- Whats the difference between the government and corporations One controls politics, the other is the government
- Trading gold for a good consulting / corporate or office joke... Guys, it's been a long day, I need a laugh and I've got three months of gold to give away. Help me out?
- I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, covered in cream, and purchased from a large multinational corporation with a history of exploitation
- Long John Silver's is the perfect representation of corporate greed. Nearly everything that company does is selfish.
- I know for a fact corporations are trying to put chips in our bodies Lay's and Ruffles are buy one get one free at the grocery store
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Corporate One Liners
Which corporate one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with corporate? I can suggest the ones about company and industrial.
- I won't believe corporations are people Until Texas executes one.
- What are the three branches of the government? Military, Corporate, and Hollywood
- Who has killed more indians than John Wayne? Union Carbide Corporation
- What did the sergeant say to the corporal? I need to see your privates.
- Why does EA keep winning Worst Corporation In America? Because Ubisoft is French.
- Do Sergeants believe in Corporal punishment... Or is that a Private matter ?
- Why are corporations and mosques so similar? They both only care about the prophet
- I'm not sure I like Duluth Trading Company's corporate policies. They have room to grow.
- A gaggle of geese, a brood of hens, what do you call a group of turkeys? A corporation.
- What hotel did Blockbuster rent for their corporate retreats? Hotel Rewind-a.
- Paradox Corporation just opened. They're doing everything they can to go out of business.
- corporations freed the slaves down from half price
- What's the most dangerous thing in the corporate ocean? The Loan Shark
- Our corporate travel agency booked me a flight on United I got reservations.
- Why couldn't the ghost possess anyone? The struggle was corporeal.
Corporate Office Jokes
Here is a list of funny corporate office jokes and even better corporate office puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- If I work as a janitor at an office, does that mean that every time I change a lightbulb I climb the corporate ladder?
- Why do corporations hire female Equality Officers? Because there cheaper.
Corporate Lawyer Jokes
Here is a list of funny corporate lawyer jokes and even better corporate lawyer puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Q: How many corporate attorneys does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Who knows, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant. - I wonder if the lawyer of Mr. Armstrong, the ex-Tour de France winner, ever worked for a big corporation or if he was strictly a Free Lancer.
Corporate America Jokes
Here is a list of funny corporate america jokes and even better corporate america puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do the United Street Dopeboyz of America and United Airlines have in common? They both throw hooks when they "corporate thuggin"
Corporate Finance Jokes
Here is a list of funny corporate finance jokes and even better corporate finance puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why are Pandas so good at Corporate finance? Coz they are all about P and A
Gather Around for Heartwarming Corporate Jokes and Uplifting Humor
What funny jokes about corporate you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean executive jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make corporate pranks.
At a corporate party…
The director of HR stood up and said If anyone has any comments or anything they'd like to say please come up to the microphone
An employee stood up and walked over. He picked up the microphone and pointed it directly at the speakers. A loud obnoxious noise screeched out and filled the room. Everyone covered their ears as he held it there. He then turned it away and handed it back to the HR director. To which the HR director said…
Thank you for your feedback.
An actual joke that was told by Jews during World War II
An SS man says to a Jew in a concentration camp: "You are to be killed today, but I will give you a chance. One of my eyes is a glass eye. If you can guess which one it is, I will give you your life."
The Jew looks at the SS man and says, "The left one, Herr Corporal."
"That is correct. How did you recognize it?"
"Because it looks so human."
A man joins a big corporate empire as a trainee.
On his very first day of work, he dials the pantry and shouts into the phone, "Get me a coffee, quickly!"The voice from the other side responded, "You fool you've dialed the wrong extension! Do you know who you're talking to, dumbo?""No," replied the trainee."It's the CEO of the company, you fool!"The trainee shouts back, "And do you know who YOU are talking to, you fool?!""No," replied the CEO indignantly."Good!" replied the trainee, and slams down the phone.
Mr. Smith, the president of a large corporation...
One day Mr. Smith, the president of a large corporation, called his vice-president, Dave, into his office and said, "We're making some cutbacks, so either Jack or Barbara will have to be laid off." Dave looked at Mr. Smith and said, "Barbara is my best worker, but Jack has a wife and three kids. I don't know whom to fire."
The next morning Dave waited for his employees to arrive. Barbara was the first to come in, so Dave said, "Barbara, I've got a problem. You see, I've got to lay you or j**... and I don't know what to do?" Barbara replied, "Well, you'd better j**.... I've got a headache."
A young soldier was making his first parachute jump.
The corporal explained the procedure "You count to ten and pull the first ripcord. If the c**... doesn't open, pull the second. That should do it. Then, after you land, there'll be a truck waiting to pick you up."
The soldier checked his gear, called out the customary "Geronimo! " and jumped out of the plane. He counted to ten and pulled the ripcord. The c**... failed to open. He pulled the second ripcord and the c**... still didn't open. As he plummeted downward, he said, "I'll bet that g**... truck won't be there either."
A corporal needed to use the pay phone but didn't have change.
He saw a private mopping the floor nearby and asked, "Soldier, do you have change for a dollar?" The private replied, "Sure, hang on." The corporal gave him an icy stare and yelled, "That's no way to address your superior! Straighten up and let's try that again! Private, do you have change for a dollar?"
The private stood at attention and boomed, "NO SIR!"
An aspiring writer once said, I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!
He now writes error messages for the Microsoft Corporation.
The Corporate Ladder
A recent study in USA have found an interesting relationship between a man social status and the sport he watches
1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL
2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employee is BOWLING
3. The sport of choice for front line workers is American FOOTBALL
4. The sport of choice for supervisors is BASEBALL
5. The sport of Choice for middle management is TENNIS
6. the sport of Choice for corporate Officers is GOLF
CONCLUSION: The Higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your b**... become
A joke about eggs
An egg soldier is on a battlefield, trying to make contact with the egg commander.
"Sir, can you hear me?"
"Yes but there's a large amount of static on your end."
"Just as I thought."
"What do you mean, corporal?"
"Our communications have been scrambled."
Many ravens are called a congress...
Owls are a parliament, eagles are a convocation and crows are a m**....
Does this mean that a group of vultures are a corporation?
Corporate Story
At a meeting, the Boss told a joke.
Everyone on the team laughed except o**....
The Boss asked him, 'Didn't you understand my joke?'
The guy replied, 'Oh I understood it, but I resigned this morning.'
What's the difference between s**... and a corporation?
In s**... the person on top does most of the work
