The Best 13 Contribute Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Contribute jokes. There are some contribute help jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these contribute contribution puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Contribute Jokes and Puns

My wife said she wanted just one child of each gender

I told her "how about just one boy and one girl? I don't want to contribute to overpopulation."

4 million of these people enter our country every year. They are uneducated, unskilled, and contribute nothing. They are a burden to honest, hardworking Americans and our government is doing nothing to stop them, not to mention they're dirty and they smell bad. THEY DON'T EVEN SPEAK ENGLISH!!

I really hate babies.

Army Wargames

During an Army war game, a commanding officer's jeep got stuck in the mud. The C.O. saw some men lounging around nearby and asked them to help him get unstuck.

"Sorry sir, "said one of the loafers, "but we've been classified dead and the umpire said we couldn't contribute in any way."

The officer turned to his driver and said, "Go drag a couple of those dead bodies over here and throw them under the wheels to give us some traction."

They helped.

Contribute joke, Army Wargames

The thinner you are, the less you contribute to pollution.

Because less waist.

A Republican and a scientist were together during the last moments of the Titanic...

The scientist said "In a hundred years that giant iceberg would melt and contribute in the rising of the sea level."

Then the Republican said "If we're sinking, why are we a hundred feet up in the air?"

A boy tells his father, "I can't wait until I contribute to society!"

Father: "So you don't want to be a part of it?"

Two old friends run into each other at a bar

Two old friends run into each other at a bar. The one friend says to the other "Nice to see you, you're looking really good. Have you lost weight?" "Yeah I have, actually." says the other friend. The first friend asks, "How did you manage to get so fit?" The friend replies "Well, I'd like to contribute it to a good diet and exercise...but the Judge claims it's from excessive drinking and evading the police."

Contribute joke, Two old friends run into each other at a bar

Why do Pirates always end up retiring early?

Because from a young age they were taught to contribute to theirΒ  ARRRR-ARRRR-SP

What do Polar Bears contribute to the local newspaper?

The Arcticles.

If everyone contributes a small amount of their income...

Together we can pool the resources to defeat socialism.

My wife wanted a child of each gender

I said no thanks, i don't want to contribute to overpopulation

You can explore contribute overpopulation reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean contribute partake dad jokes. There are also contribute puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Yo Momma jokes. Please contribute.

Your mom is a lumberjack
Your mom is a linebacker
Your mom shaves her chin stubble

I wanted to tell the Girl Scout, "Your cookies contribute to US obesity."

But what came out was, "Two Samoas, please."

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the contribute possess jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working contribute relations piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes